Blood
by IWishIWasAWeasley
Summary: "The way Tedromeda should be written!" -Reviewer :: Andromeda Black has learnt to accept her status as a member of the Ancient House of Black. However, when she meets the outspoken Hufflepuff, Ted, her perspective on life changes. Includes lots of Andromeda, Ted, Rabastan, and Bellatrix. "Pureblood" Number One. Prequel to "Pure."
1. Chapter 1

_Andromeda  
__Andromeda Black  
__7th Year  
__Slytherin  
__Prefect, Chaser  
__Pureblood_

I'm a Black.

When I say that, people use one of two responses:  
1. Worship the ground I walk on  
2. Run  
Either way, they're scared of me. They think I'll judge them, that I'll condemn them to social outcasts or kill off every member of their extended family if they do anything to displease me. People call me judgemental, when really, they're the ones judging me.  
I'm never given a chance.  
Everyone thinks I'm Bellatrix.

I'll admit, Bella can be intimidating. To others, she's downright scary. She's gotten in plenty trouble for hexing people and causing scenes in the Great Hall if any muggleborns accidentally bump into her. She never gets punished though; Slughorn is as scared of her as anyone else, and our intimidating parents don't add much assistance. So, Bella, Cissy and I typically do whatever we want and no one punishes us; or even questions us for that matter. Narcissa and I would probably abuse our power alot more if it weren't for Bellatrix.

Bellatrix goes out of her way to belittle and humiliate everyone and anyone. She has a temper worse than a blast-ended screwt and will lash out at anyone who displeases her. People in Hogwarts or not, no matter what age, race, gender, build, background and house are scared of her and flee when she arrives. The Slytherins bow to her. As the unofficial queen of our house, she did whatever she wanted and controlled her classmates and housemates with a sharp tongue and and unyeilding wand.  
That's how things were when Bella was still in school.  
She strutted around in her to-tall shoes with her nose in the air, her dark curls flowing, and her wand at her side. She went wherever she wanted, said whatever she wanted, and did whatever she wanted; and no one dared question her in fear of being hexed into oblivion. The only people above her wrath are Narcissa and I. Us, along with our parents, aunts and uncles, are the only people Bellatrix has any respect for. It doesn't matter how pure you claim your blood to be; If you're not a Black, you're not good enough.  
Bellatrix lives without rules. And it scares me.

It scares Narcissa too. We have an unspoken understanding, Cissy and I. Neither one of us know what to do with Bellatrix, so we just let her be. We never voice our fears for our out-of-control sister though, you never know who's listening.  
And that's the thing about the Black sisters; we never trash talk each other. You'll never catch any of us sister if one happens to be missing from the group. We're extremely loyal to one another, us Blacks. Family comes first.

Unless you're Sirius Black, of course.  
But that's another story.

The point is, Cissy and I have witnessed, firsthand what power has done to our big sister. And we're scared to let it happen to us.

* * *

My sister Bellatrix was the queen of Slytherin house in her time, she always loved Cissy and I at her side. When she left, naturally, her title was handed down to me. Because the Blacks always rule the Slytherins. When I leave, the crown will go to Narcissa. When she leaves, it'll go to Regulus (since Sirius is a bit of a prat). Why is this the order, you may ask? Because we're the Blacks. Apparently, that makes one royalty in the eyes of my family and house-mates. And I can deal with that. I can be late for any class (except Transfiguration) be caught in the halls after hours, copy homework, go into any Slytherin dorms, and basically do whatever the crap I want. I try not to overdo it though, I saw what happened to Bellatrix. My sister loved to push boundaries. It was the same when we were kids. When mum said "don't touch the stove, it's hot!" Narcissa and I dutifully obeyed. Narcissa, ever loyal and obedient, would stay on the other side of the kitchen. Myself, curious Andromeda, would walk right up to the stove and study it. I'd feel the heat on my young face, get the picture, and not touch it. Bella, however, had to discover the outcome of touching it. She had to test the consequences. Her fingers were burnt many-a-time, but pushing boundaries was a habit my sister never grew out of. As we got older, she forgot feeling stovetops and fireplaces. Bellas new hobby was to see how many rules she could get away with breaking before she was punished. She typically obeyed our parents, but at school, Bellatrix loved discovering yet another school law that she was above. The only people who ever stand up to her were Narcissa, myself, Professor Dumbledore, and Professor McGonagall.

I like McGonagall. She's fair. She dislikes Bella though, that much is clear. You can say she's not to popular within my house, but those idiots probably deserved it.  
As soon as Bellatrix left, McGonagall seemed to warm up to me, if that's even possible for such a rigid woman. I know she judges me slightly on my name and my house, but I work hard in Transfiguration, and she respects that. In fact, Transfiguration is the only class I really work hard in.

And that's life at Hogwarts for me, Andromeda Black. People think I, as a Black, control everyone. But in a way, they control me. And it's kinda sad.  
I guess it comes from being the little sister of Bellatrix Black. She always decided what us three sisters thought and what we were going to do, always refecting on our families views. And Narcissa and I fell into line behind her and let her take care of it, because that's what Bella did, and it's what she loves. Bella loves power, and it's changing her. It scares me to know that her first source of power was over me and Cissy.  
But Bellatrix is gone now, graduated from Hogwarts. yet my housemates who I supposedly rule still have more influence over me than they should. Here's how it works:

When decisions are made, the boys come up with a plan they find suitable, and then present it to me for approval. I usually agree with them, because that's just me. If they were under the reign of Bella, she'd make the plan and they'd obey or die a painful death.  
I'm exaggerating.  
But you can tell the boys love me more than Bellatrix, because I'm content letting them do the mental labor. I'm usually on board with whatever they do, and they're all happier because of it. I will protest certain parts of their plans though, I'm the only logical mind left in this house. Narcissa tries to please everyone, but I know when something isn't going to work. And my housemates listen to me, because I'm a Black but also because they trust my judgement. So yes, our inner-house government works quite well.


	2. Chapter 2

I don't hate Muggleborns.

_**There!**_ _I said it!_

Now I never have to say it again.

Because Bellatrix might actually hex me.

Now I can get on with my life, because that's the truth; I don't hate Muggleborns. Only Bella does. And she's very vocal about it.  
Narcissa and I, on the other hand, we're just scared of them.

Not that we'd ever admit it.

And it's not that I'm scared that Muggles and Muggleborns have awful diseases like my grandparents say, and I know that muggles wont kill me if I look into their eyes; that's a basilisk. I'm more afraid of what my family and pureblood friends would do if they saw me conversing with a muggleborn. I'd be grounded for forever!  
There's something else I'm afraid of.  
I'm afraid that if I ever got close enough to a mugglebron, I'd discover that my doubts were correct and that they really aren't any different from me.

* * *

Our group is sitting in the common room after supper, the boys fuming.

"Who's the little Weasel who sent dung-bombs with tracking devices on our tails! Huh! It took forever to get rid of that smell!" Antonin Dolohov shouts in rage.  
"Whoever it was, we'll find out! And they'll pay!" Demetrius Nott agreed angrily.  
After supper, some prankster set tracking dung-bombs on our boys. From what I heard, the smell was awful. Funny, it sounds alot like something my little cousin Sirius would do. I smile at the thought.  
Ah, Sirius Black. I'm his favorite cousin, as he constantly likes to remind everyone. He's such a funny kid! How can you not love him! BUT WHY IS HE IN GRYFFINDOR! He wants to annoy his parents, I know. But isn't that too far? He likes taking it too far though, that boy. I'm reminded again of the dung-bombs.  
"Andromeda, why are you smiling?" Thorfinn Rowle asks. Ah, Thorfinn Rowle. He's cute. Ask anyone. Seventh year. He's hot, arrogant, mean and cruel. He loves attention from girls and treats every one of them like dirt, just like every other boy in this house. If they could all board a ship and become vikings with no manners I think they'd be the happiest boys on the planet. I realize I have to answer his question, but I don't want to give Sirius away.  
"You'd like to know, wouldn't you Rowle?" I reply mysteriously. The boy grants me a flirtatious smile and leans back into sofa, an air of arrogance surrounding him.

I look around at out group. We're quite a variety here. The only thing we have in common is our anti-mudblood movement. The boys are all the same with girls though.

Beside Thorfinn sits his best mate, Antonin Dolohov, seventh year. Dolohov never takes life seriously. He's always pranking people, making fun of them, or just having a laugh at the expense of others. His moto is "You only live once!" or "YOLO!" for short. He uses that stupid moto as an excuse for everything. He never studies or even pays attention in class. He's had more than his fair share of detentions. What gets me about Antonin most though, is the way he treats girls. He's an absolute pig! Antonin Dolohov has no respect for girls what-so-ever. He treats every one of them like crap. He'll shag them then tell them that he's had better or call them a skank, and leave. Yet girls flock to him! He doesn't even pretend to be a gentleman like Thorfinn. At least Rowle _tries_ to make you feel special. Dolohov on the other hand, has no respect for anyone or anything. That's a lie. He respects Thorfinn and us Black sisters. He's afraid of Bella, but Cissy and I he usually shows respect.

On Rowle's other side, Demetrius Nott looks a bit lost. He's such an idiot. Definitely not the brightest Lumos charm ever cast. Demetrius just does whatever his fellow seventh years, Thorfinn and Antonin, are doing. His intelligence level is negative twenty. His only redeeming factor is that Nott can follow directions. I will never understand how he gets girls. He takes Rowle and Dolohov's leftovers, I guess.

I scan our circle for the other seventh year boy. I spot him lounging lazily in an armchair opposite mine.

Those armchairs. You see, there are three armchairs flanking the sofas in the slytherin common room. In the past, these armchairs went to the Black Sisters. No exceptions, no questions asked. Narcissa and I still occupy the two chairs that sit side by side. The other chair, however, is up for grabs to anyone. Naturally, it's an unspoken contest to get the chair every time our group uses the common room. Rabastan or Thorfinn usually get it.

It is Rabastan who is currently occupying the chair now. Rabastan Lestrange, seveventh year. Rabastan is my favorite seventh year boy. I consider him a friend more-so than the others. Rabastan is smart, but he's also very sharp, perceptive and quick to catch on to anything. Even so, I still have to point out illogicalities in his grand schemes to prank any Gryffindors. However, he's much sharper than the other boys. Lestrange's other good quality is his habit of actually having one girlfriend at a time and not cheating on her. Not usually. He enjoys a shag as much as the next guy, but he prefers getting it all from one girl. I guess you could say he has class.

Rabastan's current girlfriend is half sleeping lazily in his lap. Patricia Eaton, seventh year, is Rabastan's girlfriend of several months. She's cute as a button with her short blond pixie cut and faint freckles. She's rather petit and super skinny. It always surprises you when you see and angry, sneaky or seductive look on Patricia's face. It just looks un-natural! You expect her to be a goody-two-shoes at first glance! Patricia is anything but. She's also not very good in school. She is, however, excellent in Care of Magical Creatures and Ancient Runes. She's also fluent in Mermish. I suspect she's a fraction Veela, but she'd never admit it. Bellatrix has screamed about it several times, always very publicly, but Patricia always denied it. The rest of us seem content with leaving it at that. Well, except the twins, but they're just jealous.

On the other sofa sits Lara Selwyn, seventh year, her dark hair framing her dark face. She's currently lecturing her little brother, Carlile Selwyn, fourth year, who's sitting at his sisters feet. Beside Carlile is the annoying Parkinson boy. I don't know why we tolerate him. If he annoys me again, I'll show him who he's messing with.

Beside Lara, my own cousin, Evan Rosier, sixth year, is muttering something to his best mate, Lucius Malfoy. Mr. Malfoy.  
I for one, cannot stand him. As a sixth year, Malfoy is a prefect, plays on the quidditch team and is the most arrogant bastard I've ever had to meet. He's so full of himself. He thinks he should be the one sitting in the spare armchair. Pu-lease! Seventh Years need some sort of privileges! The thing is, Lucius is very persuasive. It'd be more trouble than it's worth for me to get him kicked out of our group. And Evan's my cousin. Damnit.

Timur Yaxley, fifth year, is sitting on the arm of the sofa, anxiously watching the door. His two fellow fifth years, Tarmac Crabbe and Vance Goyle are in detention with McGonagall along with the sixth Year Theo Urqheart. I don't envy those three at all.

Finally, on the floor, sits a young greasy boy by the name of Severus Snape. What year is he in? First? Second? I don't remember, but the boy's maturity impresses me greatly. He's smarter than any of the other boys, and more mature than all of them put together! He's the master of the poker face, the prince of self control. I'm not impressed by his lack of interest in everyone and everything, however. He pretends not to care. And I for one, don't understand his friendship with that little ginger mudblood girl in Gryffindor. Everyone else gets mad. He only gets away with it because of me. I mean, she's a muggleborn, and a girl. Yet they're best friends. I see how close they are, and wonder if maybe mudbloods aren't so different from us.

Then I tell myself to stop wondering that.


	3. Chapter 3

Our group is still sitting in the common room, and all is well. And then, I feel it.  
The feeling of deepest loathing.  
I hear a hideous fake giggle.  
Yup, the Trashy Twins have arrived.

Riley and Dawn Casavant are the biggest sleaze-bags in Hogwarts History. They even beat Skeeter! And that's saying something!  
I'm so happy Rita graduated when Bellatrix did, it's so much quieter with Rita Skeeter gone.

The Casavant twins have now reached our group, but Dawn doesn't stop when Riley does. Instead, the second half of the disgusting duo struts over to Antonin and starts snogging him like it's life support. Gross.  
Riley, Sleazy Sister #1, is still surveying our circle, seeing as it's Dawn turn to shag Dolohov. Her makeup-caked eyes rest upon Rabastan too long for my liking, and Patricia seems to agree since she shot Riley the dirtiest look imaginable. Riley finally makes up her mind and sways over to Demetrius the Desperate. Rather than a public snogging session, Riley takes Nott my the arm and they skip off to the dormitories.  
They better be using the boys dorm, because I will give them both detention if I have to walk in on them again.  
Being a prefect does have its perks.

* * *

I'm walking down the corridor towards Charms with Patricia Eaton and Lara Selwyn, gossiping about some skanky Gryffindor who no one likes who's now dating some guy named Finnigan, when the boys arrive.  
Suddenly, Patricia's books are gone. Then she screams.  
Rabastan has grabbed her waist from behind and is now nibbling on her ear affectionately. The prat must've vanished her books! Boys.  
"Oh fine, I'll ditch Charms!" Patricia says, apparently reading her boyfriends mind. Those two scare me sometimes.  
"Besides," the blond continues "The Charms professor is so old, he wont even notice."  
"It's a wonder he can still see!" Agrees Demetrius, who's in a very good mood after his night with Riley. Yuck.

Patricia and Rabastan skip off down the hall, hand in hand, away from the charms class.  
"Hmph. Boyfriends." Lara huffs. Poor Lara.  
Lara dated a boy named Zabini since the summer before sixth year. But he graduated last year. They decided to take a break instead of attempt a long-distance relationship. I know Lara is unhappy about it, even though she hardly complains about it. But Lara and Zabini are both to lazy for long-distance dating. In the meantime, they're both free to shag whomever they want for a year. But I know Lara misses the hand-holding and piggybacks that Zabini gave her. Now she has to watch Patricia have her turn. Boys are a waste of time.

"C'mon you lot. Let's go to Charms. We can't get away with everyone skipping." I say matter-of-factly. And with that, I strut down the hall towards Charms, Lara at my side. The others follow, and don't question me, because that's how things work in Slytherin House.

* * *

I can't decide how I feel about Severus Snapes friendship with that mudblood girl.  
I mean, that boy has no personality. Zip, zero, none. His eyes are forever dark and dead.  
Until he looks at her.  
His eyes light up and almost, dance. He's happy. Truly happy. Just looking at his best friend. I've never seen anyone look at another person that way.  
And that's why I let him be friends with her.  
It's blood treachery, and it's apparently my job to keep my fellow Slytherins in line. but I just can't do it.  
I can't take away someone's happiness.

But the friendship bothers me too.  
She's a mudblood.  
Mudbloods are unintelligent, hostile, filthy partial animals, right?  
I'm exaggerating.  
The thing is, the rest of my family believes it.  
But I've always been Andromeda the curious. I'd be right beside Bella, feeling the hot stove if I weren't so obedient. I have trouble accepting what others say, I like to find things out for myself, explore. But usually, when given a command, I obey. "Mudbloods are bad, do not talk to them." And I obey.

But still, when I see little Severus with that Lily girl, I can't help but wonder.

* * *

I'm watching Snape and his little friend walk away right now. They're happily talking, heading out to the grounds. I feel myself smiling.

I'm still contemplating the unlikely friendship and definitely not paying attention to where I'm going. This proves to be a fatal mistake, as I crash into someone walking the opposite direction from me. Books go flying as out two forms collide. We both fall to the floor, facing each other.  
I don't know what to say. I never run into people, nevermind fall over. I'm a Black. We walk with poise, yet power. Graceful, but authoritative.  
And I'm sitting on the floor with my books scattered around me.  
Thank goodness no one usually comes down this corridor.  
I look at whoever I knocked over. Should I apologize?

I stop.  
I stop breathing.  
HIM!  
I just ran into a mudblood.

I'm sitting here, on the floor, in a deserted corridor, staring at a MUDBLOOD!  
I'm totally dumbstruck!  
This doesn't happen!

Tonks, the 17 year old Hufflepuff sitting in front of me, seems as surprised as I am.  
I mean, I'm the ever-composed Andromeda Black. Yet I've just fallen on the floor in front of him and my books and quills are everywhere. Most people would pay to see this.  
"Oh, umm, I'm sorry." He says.

DID HE JUST SAY SORRY!  
Grandma says Mudbloods eat off the floor and bite each other in greeting because they have no manners. AND HE'S SAYING SORRY!  
If I didn't look shocked before, I'm sure I've made up for it now. Keeping your composer has always been a Black family skill, one that I thought I'd mastered. Yet I can feel my eyes bulging.  
Maybe I should get lessons from Severus?  
FOCUS!

Tonks looks very confused by my reaction. He seems to have recovered, as he stands up. He offers me his hand, to help me up.  
I almost take it, but I'm really scared now. I've never been this close to a mudblood. It's still sinking in that I just TOUCHED one!  
"Um, I, ah, uh, I-um," I stammer as I let myself up, ignoring his hand. He's still giving me a very confused look, yet now it's mixed with- wait- amusement! Does he think this is funny!  
"Scorgify!" I say sharply, in need of a distraction. The various books, parchement and quills zoom into two seperate piles. My stuff and his. The piles are neat and perfect. As always. I'm a neat freak, and a master at cleaning spells. The boy before me looks blown away for a moment, but quickly regains his composure. I know he's impressed. I can knock anyone's socks off. I can feel the smug smile on my face. Tonks smiles despite my smugness. And we share a smile.  
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!

BELLA WOULD HEX ME IF SHE KNEW! ANYONE COULD WALK DOWN THIS HALLWAY AT ANY MOMENT! AND I'M SMILING AT A MUDBLOOD!  
I use an accio charm-non verbally-and my perfect pile of possessions soars into my arms. I scurry away without looking back.


	4. Chapter 4

I'm shaking.

I'm literally shaking.  
I'm sitting on the floor of the prefects bathroom, shaking violently. My books lay forgotten on the floor.

I just met a mudblood.

And there was nothing wrong with him.

I just TOUCHED a mudblood!

And my skin isn't developing a rash or dragon pox.

There was noting wrong with him.

He was a polite, seemingly nice boy with a sense of humour and a quick whit. He had no fangs or foreign diseases.

But most of all, _he didn't judge me._

Mudbloods run when they see me. Some in fear, others will throw me a scornful look on their way out. But not him. Not that Hufflepuff boy. Not Tonks.  
TED! That's his name! He plays Quidditch! And he's a prefect. I just forgot his name.

He offered to help me up.

No one outside of my house would do that.  
They'd probably take a picture of the "Pureblood Princess" and hold it for ransom or else blackmail me with it. Or they'd just make copies of it and laugh about "knocking her off her high horse."

But he offered to help me up.

Maybe I'm right.

Maybe the mudbloods aren't the bad guy.

* * *

I'm sitting at our usual place in the Slytherin common room, pretending to study Transfiguration. I'm actually reliving my first encounter with a mudblood. Still no rashes.  
I knew Great Uncle Lycoris was lying about those rashes.

So here I sit, off in dreamland, reeling in surprise.

"Well well, Andromeda." A cool voice comes from behind me. I jump.  
"Woah now!" It's Rowle. "My my, did I - scare you? Is the great Andromeda Black scared of little old Thorfinn?" he smiles wickedly. He has a nice smile, I'll give him that.  
"Nonsense Rowle," I reply curtly. "You merely startled me. I warn you, it is unwise to sneak up on a Black."  
"That's usually quite true. Today, however, drawing your wand seemed to be the last thing on your mind." he replies suggestively.  
And he's right.  
"I don't need this right now, Rowle." I say unkindly. And it's the truth. I have way too much on my mind right now to tolerate my incompetent housemates.  
"Andromeda, will you stop calling me Rowle? Aren't we passed that stage?" He's acting weird...  
"I don't know what you're referring to Rowle, but first names is usually a sign of respect, is it not?" I ask, looking rather haughty with my eyebrow raised, Bellatrix style.  
"Are you saying you don't respect me?" he asks  
"My respect is something that is earned, not given. And annoying me while I'm attempting to study because I actually want to pass Transfiguration is no way to earn any respect from me." I sound so much like Bellatrix, it scares me. I learn from the best.  
"You've made your point, m'lady." The seventeen year old says. And with that, he strides from the room, leaving me alone in the common room.

Yes, being me has its perks.

* * *

Lunch. Best part of my day. Okay, maybe it ties with Charms class. Charms is so easy, I love it. But lunch is wonderful as well. That's a lie. Lunch sucks. At least the food at lunch is good. Now that I think about it, the food at supper is so much better. The elves seem to slack off at lunch. They save the best for last, for sure. I hate lunch.  
I'll have to make this lunch break quick, anyway. I need to look for my potions book before our next class. I'm not overly worried, though. I could have never bought one and Slughorn wouldn't care. He likes me, not to mention he's terrified of my parents and sister. So I'm not too fussed.

* * *

Lunch was it's usual uneventful boringness with a table full of morons. At least the steak and kidney pie was good. I was still grateful for an excuse to escape.  
I strut down the corridor like I own the place, because in a way I do. We Blacks have a walk all our own. It's sassy yet serious, playful yet professional. We're sexy, but you know we mean business. When we walk, people know not to mess with us.

Despite being lost in my thoughts, I'm very alert. The Black walk does that to you. Plus, I don't want another encounter like the one I had with Thorfinn. Next time, I'll be ready.

That next time came sooner than expected, however. As I continued down the corridor, a hand from behind grabbed my wrist. Being in the middle of a war, I immediately assume the worst. If an order of the Phoenix member has come to take me hostage, I'll be ready to fight.  
I whirl around quickly, a point my wand at the nose of my attacker. Then I register who it is.

Ted Tonks.

WHY WONT THAT MUD-BLOOD LEAVE ME ALONE SO I CAN FORGET ABOUT HIM!

"Would you put that down? I have Quidditch practice later, I'd prefer to have my nose intact for it." The teenage boy says, his eyes crossing to keep track of my raised wand.  
Who does he think he is! I'm rather annoyed now. By his words, the fact that he keeps messing up my head _and_ the fact that he assumes I'll lower my wand. He must not know much about us Blacks.  
"And what makes you think I'll do that, Hufflepuff?" I reply haughtily. He probably thinks I'm a total bitch by now. Let him.  
"Because if you hex me, I'll use your Potions book as a shield. And you don't want your Potions book wrecked." He says back, grinning mischievously. It's a face I've seen on Sirius many times.  
Wait, POTIONS BOOK!  
_"My Potions book!" _I cry._ "You **stole** my Potions book!"  
_Pleeeaaasssseeee don't prove my crazy relatives right that all mudbloods are out to get me!  
"Of course not! I'd never steal from anyone! It got mixed into my pile that day we ran into each other, literally." He replied  
"O-oh." I don't know what to say. He's returning a Slytherins book.  
"Why would you think I stole it?" Tonks asked

_Because you're a mud-blood! All my life, I've been told that you're filthy, evil, scheming, incompetent animals who want to overcome the pure-bloods and take over the world. You all hate me and want to get me and make my life miserable. That's why._ That's what a little voice in the back of my head says. That's the voice of my family. The voice of my aunts, uncles, grandparents, parents, and sister. I always obey that voice. Always. But this time, I ignore the voice. For the first time, I ignore them.

"I just couldn't think of another logical way for you to acquire my book." I replied. I'm surprised by my answer, I mean, where did_ that_ come from! Tonks seems surprised as well. I ponder his expression further.

He knows. He knows what I was thinking. And I know he was expecting it. But Ted Tonks was expecting me to vocalize it. I was expecting me to vocalize it. But I didn't.  
This is all thanks to my not-as-perfect-as-I-thought charm work.

"I guess my charm work isn't perfect after all." I say  
"I guess your charm work isn't perfect after all." he says

At the same time.

Woah.

I don't like this.

I glance at his surprised expression once more before hurrying away with my book.


	5. Chapter 5

"So, we are gathered here to update The List." Antonin Dolohov drawled.

A large group of us are gathered in the Slytherin common room. A fire is burning in the ornate fireplace. Everyone is tired from a full day of school, yet suddenly, we all perk up at the mention of The List.

The List.  
The Blood-Traiter List.

This can't be good.

"The List?" Snape questioned, eyebrow raised.  
"It's a list of names of every blood-traiter in school." I answered lazily.  
The young boys eyes seemed to glaze over, like he was somewhere else. He soon snapped out of it, returning to his usual poker face. He didn't fool me though. That look on his face-it was guilt. He was thinking about that mudblood ginger. I ignore this for the time being.

"Yes, The List. This piece of parchment, visible only to Slytherins, contains the names of every Mudblood-lover in the building. However, I'm afraid it's a touch out of date." Dolohov said  
"Please tell me you guys finally took Arthur Weasley off The List! He's been graduated for how many years now?" Lara spoke up.  
"Yes Lara! He's gone! He's under the Death Eaters watch now!" Antonin hissed.  
"Never mind Weasley! We need new names!" Thorfinn cut in.

"Charity Burbage." It was Timur Yaxley who spoke up first."She's in fifth year, our year." He said, gesturing to himself and Narcissa. "Burbage doesn't care much about Mudbloods; it's straight up muggles who fascinate her." He finished, a clear look of loathing scrawled across his face.  
Muggles? How are muggle fascinating? Wizards are better in every way! They can't even use magic!  
Based on the looks on the faces of my housemates, they share my sentiments on this Charity girl. The looks of deep disgust are prominent on the faces of my fellow Slytherins.

"Put her, on top." Malfoy growls. Patricia, who is in charge of the actual writing, looks to Rabastan for approval. He nods darkly and she adds the name "Charity Burbage" to the top of the page in her beautiful hand writing.

"Mortigur Smith of Hufflepuff has informed me that the Half-Blood Savannah Karns is in a long-distance relationship with a Muggle." Evan Rosier said. Patricia scribbled her name down.  
"The Half-Blood Gryffindor Wilson Fendewalton has supposedly begun dating the Mudblood Angelica Brinks." Demetrius Nott added, saying something useful for the first time this week.

As we sat in our circle, heads bent, leaning in, speaking in whispers, more names were added and some were taken off.

"Noel Chittinghum dropped out, remember?" Lara said. Patricia crossed the former Gryffindor off the Blood-traiter list.

"Any other Mudwallowers or Muggle-lovers we forgot?" Rabastan asked to the group.

"Well," We were all surprised to find young Severus speaking up from his place on the floor. "There's Sirius Black." He said matter-of-factly.  
Every head turned to me, eyes wide in terror. They know how I feel about Sirius. Even Narcissa looks a little annoyed, and she and Sirius have never gotten along. I however, have eyes only for Snape.  
"If any of you so much as _think_ of laying _one finger_ on my cousin, I will personally show you some of the lovely tricks Bella taught me this summer. Do I make myself clear?" I said, so coldly, I could've frozen the sun. Several people actually shivered.

Bellatrix screams at people to get her message across. I, however, use an easier method of simply giving them an icy stare and a sharp tongue. I have people running from one annoyed look.

Snape's poker face, however, only falters slightly. I'm still mad.

"Besides," I continue icily. "Sirius isn't friends with any mudbloods in Gryffindor who's hair matches the banner." I lock eyes with the greasy boy before me. Understanding dawns in his eyes. He knows I've remembered his red-headed friend in Gryffindor. He realizes I'm not going to bring it up, as much as I want to in my anger, and gratitude and guilt fill his eyes. Our housemates, who're dimmer than a first years _Lumos_ charm, are clearly not following the exchange at all. I put on my best Bellatrix "don't-question-me-because-I'm-a-Black" face and say haughtily, "Is that all the names then?"

The others nod their heads and mumble "yes mam's". I know I've made my point.

* * *

The sun is creeping its way further into the sky, the Great Hall is filled with it's usual Saturday morning chatter. I however, fail to notice any of this. I have eyes solely for the piece of frilly parchment laying on the table in front of me. My jaw dropped to the floor, all I can do is stare.

I finally managed to read the parchment my family owl, Sang, had brought to my table moments before.  
"Andromeda?" Lara asked warily upon seeing my expression.  
"R-Rabastan!" I splutter  
Rabastan, the younger brother of Rodolfus Lestrage, was occupied snogging Patricia, their breakfasts long forgotten.  
"_Rabastan!_" I yell, desperate.  
"Oi!" Thorfinn, who is sitting beside the couple nudges the younger Lestrange in the ribs. Neither of the two lovebirds are very pleased about being interrupted. I'm beyond caring at this point.  
Silently, hand shaking, I hand the seventeen-year-old the frilly parchment. The boy scans it silently, eyes growing wider and wider, his skin gradually loosing its color. At least I'm not the only one panicking here.  
"Okay, what the bloody hell is going on!" Antonin snaps, unable to bear the tension. Rabastan hands the fancy parchment to Patricia who reads aloud:

_Cygnus Black III and Druella Black_  
_are proud to announce_  
_the engagement of their daughter_  
_Bellatrix Black_  
_to the Pure-Blood Wizard_  
_Rodolfus Lestrange_

_Marriage Ceremony to be held this December_

Now it's everyone else's jaws that hit the floor.

I mean, this is _Bellatrix_ we're talking about.  
_Bellatrix Black!_  
She hates everyone!

I mean, she loves our parents, Cissy and I, but that's it. That's where it ends. Everyone else's worth to her is measured on how useful they are.  
SO WHY IS SHE _MARRYING_ RODOLFUS! _SHE HATES RODOLFUS!_

Rodolfus Lestrange was the biggest player in Hogwarts in his time. The only girl he could never get was my big sister. (And Cissy and I, but we're out of bounds.)

The boy tried _everything_. Nothing could ever impress Bella. Lestrange had girls cued up to shag him whenever he said the word, yet he no longer cared for any of it. Bella was his challenge. A challenge I thought he'd never win.

Apparently I was wrong.

Because he's marrying my sister this Christmas.

Merlin help me.


	6. Chapter 6

"Did someone Imperius my sister?" I wonder aloud.

Rabastan Lestrange chuckles beside me. It's Saturday evening and as Prefects, we're patrolling (for once) near Ravenclaw tower.

"I'm serious!" I say. "I didn't think anyone would _ever_ be deemed 'good enough' for Bella!"  
"D," he starts, using his old nickname for me. "If I'm honest with you, will you promise not to hex me for it?" He asks, almost timidly  
"Rabastan! I would never hex you!" Who does he think I am!  
"Okay! Sorry! I'm just remembering the way you stared down Snape! That was scary!" He said, hands up in mock surrender.  
"Imagine how _he_ felt. Now, what were you saying?" I said, getting back on the subject of the coming marriage of our siblings.

"Well, I think I've pretty much figured out why they're doing it." Lestrange said. "Do they love each other? Nope. Rodolfus loves a challenge. Your sister is the only challenge he's ever faced. He's determined to conquer that challenge. The only real way to do so, is to marry her. As for Bellatrix, I think she just knows that no other guy could put up with her. Don't hit me!" He continued, cringing. "Not to mention the fact that to amount of respectable marriage candidates are running low. They grabbed onto the first Pureblood whom they held even some attraction for that they could find." The younger Lestrange finished.

We walked in silence for a time, me contemplating what my friend beside me had said. His words were all true, I came to realize.

My sister Bellatrix is marrying a man she doesn't love, who doesn't love her.

I'm petrified.

* * *

Our patrol nearly finished, Rabastan and I make our way past the kitchens, towards the Hufflepuff corridor. We turn a corner to take a shortcut and stumble across quite the scene.

Thorfinn Rowle  
Antonin Dolohov  
Demetrius Nott  
Lucius Malfoy  
Evan Rosier  
Theo Urqheart  
Timur Yaxley  
Tarmac Crabbe  
and Lance Goyle

All huddled in a large oval. But what are they huddled around?

"Oi! You lot!" Rabastan speaks up beside me.  
"What is going on here!" I demand  
The male members of my house spot me, and their eyes widen in horror. Oh great. What on earth are they doing?  
I strut up to their huddle, Rabastan behind me, and the boys part to make a path for me, allowing me to see what they're all huddled around. On the ground, looking injured and exhausted, lay broken forms of Charity Burbage of Hufflepuff and Wilson Fendewalton of Gryffindor. That's why there are so many Slytherins, the boys decided to go for a double attack tonight.

I turn on my heel and place my hands on my hips. "What is this!" I demand  
"We were anxious to get a head start on punishing the scumsuckers and blood-traitors in this place." Lucius said.  
"And why wasn't I consulted about any of this!" I demand angrily  
"C'mon Andromeda, we're doing it for _him_." Dolohov pleades  
By _him_, they mean Voldemort.  
"Did _he_ give you specific orders to carry out this stupid, careless, illogical plan of yours?" I asked haughtily  
"No.." He replied, head down  
Why is Rowle looking at me like that?  
"Then get your arses back to the common room you blithering idiots! You're going to get us all caught!" I yell, stamping my foot, furious and fed up with the stupidity of my fellow snakes. "I will deal with you lot tomorrow!" They don't need to be told twice. I seldom loose my temper the way Bella does, so when I do, it scares the dungbombs out of them. The boys are gone so fast, they might as well have apparated. Rabastan and I survey the two injured forms of the blood-traitors at our feet.  
"What do we do now?" Rabastan asks  
"Leave." I reply. None of us know how to perform a memory charm, so there's nothing to be done. Hopefully fear will keep them quiet.

* * *

**Sorry for the shorter chapter guys, the events just worked out that way.**

**105 views! My first story has 25 views even though it's been up a month longer and has 10 000 more words... Oh well! Thanks guys!**  
**The only thing that would make life better is if Pottermore would work...**

**xoxo - IWishIWasAWeasley **


	7. Chapter 7

Turns out fear doesn't work.

Wilson and Charity told, naturally. I'm not too fussed though.

The lot of us were pulled from Potions class (those Gryffindors know how to give dirty looks) and hauled up to the Headmasters office by a very angry McGonagall. Professor Dumbledore was awaiting us there.  
Wilson and Charity were sitting in the Headmasters sitting room at the back of his office, clearly not wanting to be in the same room as us Slytherins. Like we'd hex them in the Headmasters office!  
Oh, dragon dung! Dumbledore was talking and I missed everything he was saying. I tune back into reality and catch the end of the Headmasters speal.

"It also happens that in addition to the accounts of the victims, we have two eye-witnesses. Peeves and the Fat-Friar both caught on to what you were up to and summoned me. We found Miss Burbage and Mr. Fendelwalton alone in a dark corridor. You will all receive an equally severe punishment." The ancient wizard finished.

WOAH, WOAH, WOAH! If these idiots are going down, they are _not_ dragging me with them!  
"Excuse me sir," I start, but the Headmaster cuts me off.

"Ah yes, forgive me, Miss Black. The victims informed me of the timely accidental arrival of you and Mr. Lestrange. As you had no part in Saturday's proceedings, you and Mr. Lestrange may return to your Potions class while Professor McGonagall and I take care of these." Dumbledore said, gesturing to the other Slytherin boys.

"Thank you sir." Rabastan and I say before leaving the office.  
And oh, the glares we got when we returned to class.

* * *

I have a confession.

I'm awful at Transfiguration.

I mean, I'm smart, streetwise and schoolwise. I don't even have to put in much effort for my decent marks.

Except Transfiguration.

I just can't do it! It's the only class I study for, yet I'm passing in the fifties! Black's don't get fifties!  
So, instead of trying to drill all that theory into my head, I've decided to actually _practice_ Transfiguration on my own time. One problem:  
_No one can know._

What would people say if they found Andromeda Black, the dark haired know it all with an icy expression and steely determination, leader of the Slytherins, of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black, who has not a care in the world except avoiding all mudbloods, practicing Transfiguration during her spare time because she sucks at it _that bad!_ Nope. No one can ever know.

Which is why I'm practicing in an un-used classroom far from everything after curfew.  
WHY CAN'T I CHANGE A BLOODY RAT INTO A GOBLET!  
It's just a furry goblet with a tail and feet!  
I'm getting rather frustrated when I hear the door opening.  
_Wait, what!_

I spin around, sending the rat/goblet flying to the floor with a squeak. It then scurries away on it's out-of-place feet and out of sight. I look up at,  
Thorfinn Rowle.  
What does he want now? That idiot is out after curfew again!

"Evening Andromeda." He says seductively. That git sounds awful when he talks like that.  
"What are you doing out after curfew Rowle!" I snap.  
"I might ask you the same thing." He says calmly, eyebrow raised.  
"None of your concern, Rowle." I reply cooly.  
"Ugh, Andromeda! You'll never cut me a break!" He says, agitated.  
"You're no less of an idiot as you were yesterday, Rowle." Is all I say. He studies me for a time, thinking of- what _is_ he thinking?

"You know, Bella's a liar." He said thoughtfully.  
Woah, woah! _No one_ insults a member of the Noble House of Black! Especially not my sisters! No matter how hot they are!  
"I mean, all those years she turned down Rodolfus and treated him like dragon dung? She didn't mean any of it!" He continued.  
"You've got it all figured out then, Rowle?" I say sarcastically, fists clenched.  
"Well, she _is_ marrying him. I mean, what more proof do you need that when it comes to guys, Bellatrix doesn't mean what she says?" Thorfinn states.  
I'm ready to tell him off fro trash talking my sister, but he interrupts my unformed words.  
"You know, you're alot like her." He says quietly, taking a step towards me.  
"If you knew Bella and I at all, you'd know that we're really quite different. And that we don't take kindly to those who insult members of the House of Black!" I retort, taking a step back.  
"Oh please, Andromeda. We both know you've been playing hard to get. But the chase is over, sweetheart. I've caught the snitch." He drawls slowly, taking yet another step in my direction.  
I move away, trying to increase the distance between us. I don't like where this is going. At all.

"Listen up, you foul mouthed git." I start. "There is no 'playing' here. I have standards and you don't meet them. It's as simple as that."  
"One mustn't tell lies, Andromeda." He replies seductively.  
My back is against the wall. I have nowhere to go.  
"Just stop fighting it Princess." He says suggestively, coming much closer than I'm willing to allow. I begin to draw my wand-  
"_Expelliarmus!_" The attractive seventeen year old before me says quickly. My wand goes shooting to the other side of the room. I'm livid.  
"_How dare you-_"  
And then he closes the gap between us, attacking my mouth with his.  
I tried pushing him, hitting him, anything. But my arms were useless while he was holding me. So, I brought my knee up, and kneed the seventeen-year-old hottie right in his man parts.  
It clearly hurt, because he let go for a few seconds. I took the opportunity to slap him in the face before retreating to the other side of the room. Wand in hand, I spoke.  
"How_ dare_ you, Thorfinn Rowle! I'll have you shunned for this!" I yelled. Who does he think he is!  
"I don't think you will, Andromeda Black! No one will take you seriously, we all saw what happened to Bellatrix!" He yelled back. "And another thing, you never told me what you were doing in an abandoned classroom, after curfew, by yourself!"  
Diligrout! The last thing I want is the whole school asking what I was doing while I was failing at transfiguring a rat! Rats are so easy to transfigure! Not to mention the fact that Thorfinn Rowle just kissed me! I'd be ruined. My pride has won over the internal battle within me, and he knows it. I'll never tell. I have too much pride.  
"You'd better not cross me again, Rowle, or you'll regret it." I snap before turning on my heel and strutting out of the room, head held high despite the fact thar I've never felt more violated or defeated than I do right now.

* * *

**Note: Ted is a Hufflepuff, not a Gryffindor. Sorry about the change!**

**-xoxo**


	8. Chapter 8

For the next few weeks leading up to Christmas Break, it was just Rabastan and the girls in the evenings, since all the other boys were serving nightly detention every night until further notice for the incident with Wilson and Charity. The only reason our Quidditch team hasn't fallen apart is because our Captain, Dolohov, insisted on missing supper every night to practice. By the time the boys were back from detention, the house elves had brought down a small feast for them. Homework didn't really get done though.  
One change was the way I was treated by the other houses. Despite having done nothing and actually being the one to stop the tortures, all the other houses assume that I'm the ringleader for the anti-blood-traitor movement. I mean, the Slytherins don't do _anything_ without my consent. So the one time they did, they got caught. _Idiots!_  
Now, I've never been on very good terms with anyone from the other houses, although I'm civil with several Ravenclaws, including friends with Paisley Crouch, a distant cousin of mine. But other than that everyone is scared of me, hate me, or both. But now it's a whole new level. When I walk down the hallway, every head turns to look my way. And it's not just my good looks causing a fuss this time. They look at me the way they look at Bellatrix.  
Okay, not quite the way they look at Bellatrix.  
But they all remember Bella, (who could forget?) and the things she did. Then they look at me, her little sister, and see the same thing. I can't really be bothered, however. Bellatrix will be pleased that I've made a name for myself in school with zero effort on my part. I couldn't care less about what a bunch of mudboods and Dunglickers (blood-traitors) think of me. I'm a Black. We're in a class of our own.

Finally, the torture was over. After saying goodbye to Patricia and Lara (I'll be seeing Rabastan soon anyway)I stepped into Professor Slughorn'd fireplace and flooed to home sweet home, Narcissa right behind me.  
As soon as the world stopped spinning, I was launched from the grand fireplace in the parlor of our manor. However, rather than stumble foreword like your average wizard, I simply float out, and land gracefully on the mantle. Because it's these things (and our family tree) that set us Blacks apart.  
I look up and there before me stands my big sister, her infamous mischievous grin present. I step sideways, and Narcissa floats out in a similar fashion to me. She's had less practice, being two years younger, but Cissy has always been the most graceful of us sisters, so it evens out.  
"My baby sisters!" Bella squeals, before rushing over to hug me and then Cissy. It's times like this when I love my sister most. She's like a big kid.  
"Merlins beard! You two have to come see your dresses! They're perfect! I wanted you two to come dress shopping with me, but Father said you two should be in school. But I know you'll love them! Come quick! You'll just die! Oh! And look!" Bellatrix was skipping all over, giddy with excitement, sounding more girly than she had in living memory. She was now flashing a giant ring to Cissy and I, awaiting our approval of her engagement ring. It was gorgeous!  
"Great Salazar! Rodolphus must've bought the most expensive thing in the store! It's beautiful!" I awed  
"I love it Bella!" Cissy gushed.  
"Actually, he let _me_ pick it out. I was the one who asked to be shown the most expensive thing in the store." Bella winked at us. The three of us burst into a fit of giggles. That's our Bella. We said hello to Mother who barely acknowledged us, and kissed Father on the cheek before bounding up the grand staircase to Bellatrix's room where our bridesmaids gowns were waiting.

* * *

With only a week left before Bellatrix becomes Mrs. Rodolphus Lestrange, us three sisters spend every waking minute together. We even spend our sleeping minutes together, since we usually all sleep in Bellas room, giggling till the wee hours of the morning.  
I love it when we don't have to worry about appearances.  
Thorfinn Rowle is far from my mind as Narcissa and I help our big sister plan her wedding to a man we're not quite convinced she loves. I haven't forgotten Cissy's face when I showed her that frilly parchment with Bella's engagement announcement on it that evening in the common room. She looked worse than Rabastan, so her surprise pretty much matched mine.  
However, Bella seems happier than she's ever been; giddy with excitement as she twirls and skips constantly and oftenly bursts into fits of giggles. Narcissa and I always giggling with her, until Mother snaps at us to grow up or that our unladylike behavior is a disgrace to the House of Black. She'll then complain about how she got stuck with daughters and never had any sons like Aunt Walburga did. But for once, not even Bellatrix cares what Mother says. We have few precious days left together, let's at least make them fun.  
The manor is busy; the wedding planner and her crew have wizards from every different corner of the globe in and out of our home, each of them specializing in some part of a wedding.

I still can't believe I'm the maid of honor! Bella didn't want to pick between Narcissa and I, but Cissy's not of age, so she can't do it anyway. So Narcissa is the only bridesmaid, since Bellatrix hated all of her dorm-mates.

Rabastan is here a lot, representing his brother seeing that he's the best man. Why doesn't Rodolphus come see his fiancee himself?  
When he's not asking Bellatrix or my parents (they love him) questions for Rodolphus, Rabastan is usually with me. Since Rabastan is the best man, and I'm the maid of honor, (I know! Excited!) we each have to make a speech. We decided to just do it together though, it means less work for the both of us.  
There is one good thing that's come from this engagement; Rabastan and I have become good mates. First is my sisters, obviously, then Lara and Patricia, then Rabastan. Life is good.


	9. Chapter 9

**Track: Apologize - One Republic **

* * *

Since the ballroom is already so beautifully decorated, not much work needed to be done by the wedding planner.

Ornately carved walnut wood pews (the same wood as Bella's wand) are lined up in two rows, flanking the center aisle. Large arrangements of black and white roses, with a few red roses thrown into each, are _everywhere_. Bella doesn't like flowers that much, but flowers she gets. Everywhere.  
The aisle is covered with red carpeting that stands out next to the overly shiny ballroom floor.  
At the beginning of the aisle is a grand staircase from which Bellatrix and the rest of the wedding party will enter the ceremony. At the end of the aisle, is an identical staircase. Narcissa will stand in front of it on the left, Rabastan and I will stand on the first step, (me on the left, he on the right) and Rodolphus and Bellatrix wil be on the fourth step, becoming husband and wife.  
Those words shouldn't scare me.  
But they do.

Bellatrix hardly mentions her fiancee, and he never comes around. It's like they don't even like each other. What Rabastan said about them that night on patrol is all true, but that's not all.  
Rodolphus and Bellatrix are getting married because that's what's expected of them.  
Because it's the right thing to do.

They're just trying to do the right thing. But is it really 'the right thing' if it costs you your happiness?

* * *

Bellatrix has never looked more beautiful. I pin a red rose into her curly raven coloured locks; the final touch.  
My sister is wearing white- a sight you will never see again. So take lots of pictures.  
Her dress is gorgeous. The top of her strapless ball gown is hand sewn with black flowers covering it and trailing down into the full, white skirt. Her train goes on for miles. It has some black flowers sewn onto the very end.  
Bellas hair is pulled up, put most of it is cascading around her in a waterfall of her midnight curls. A long vail is pinned into the top of her hair. That red rose finishes the look of perfection, and ties in the red lipstick.

She looks breathtaking. I mean, Bella's always gorgeous, she's a Black. We've all inherited our families dark good looks. Okay, Narcissa isn't dark in any way shape or form with her pale blue eyes and platinum locks, but she's still as hot as the rest of us! So I've seen Bellatrix in hundreds of dresses, I've seen her dressed up thousands of times; but it's different. This is different.

And it makes me want to bawl.

My sister looks fabulous. The ball room looks better than it ever has, all of our family and friends-including the Minister of Magic-are present. The ceremony will be beautiful and the party afterwords will go down in Black family history. My big sister looks absolutely amazing.

And it's all for a man she doesn't love.

And I just wanna cry.

I look in the mirror at Bellatrix. She sits in her usual elegance, but it's not the same. The spark has gone out of her; the intimidating and commanding presence that my big sister is so known for isn't there. She's staring in the mirror, trying to take it all in.

And then, a tear rolls down the cheek of Bellatrix Black.

Wait, _what!_?

Bella is crying.

I haven't seen Bellatrix cry since we were seven. She just, stopped. She never cried. She comforted Cissy and I when we did, but she always urged us that crying was unnecessary, was a weakness. She we wouldn't be taken seriously in the world if we cried when things sucked. She said we had to buck up and show the world what sets the Noble House of Black apart. Cissy and I are quite skilled at it now, but Bella is the master.

And here sits my sister, in a gorgeous wedding dress, with every important wizard under the sun waiting to see her, tearing up.  
I pull her up and hug her.

And we cry.

We cry for us sisters. For our good times together that are ending too soon. For our years together, cut short. We cry for the expectations thrown at us from a young age. For the childhood we hardly had. We cry, because we're tired of holding it in. We're tired of keeping up appearances 24/7 for everyone and anyone. We cry for the exhaustion it brings. We cry for the mother who doesn't love us, for the father who only loves to show us off. But most of all, we cry for Bellatrix.

We cry for the beautiful dress, the over-done flowers and the grand ceremony. For the fakeness of all the grandeur. We cry for the motivation behind the whole thing. For the power obsessed family we were born into. We cry for Rodolphus' absence in the wedding planning. For his absence is Bella's life. We cry for 'doing the right thing'. For it being so hard, taking so much. We mourn. We mourn the impending loss of my sisters happiness.

Shortly after our mourning precession started, Narcissa returned to the room with Bellas shoes. She saw our tears and couldn't stop her own. Together, the Black sisters cried. We cried more than ever before. For the first time in years, we didn't care about ladylike and appearances and controlling other people. It was becasue of our obsessions that our years together have passed us by. We've been to distracted to appreciate each other. Because in the end, that's all that matters to the Black sisters. Our time has run out. It ran out too soon. It was too late. So we cried.

After we regained our composer, we stayed there, enveloped in a group hug. The Black Sisters. Cissy and I had insisted that we would help Bellatrix get ready and that no one else was necessary. It was our last act as her little sisters. We'd ordered everyone to stay out, so we weren't interrupted. Afterwords, we sat Bellatrix down and fixed her hair and makeup. Good as new. The redness in our eyes was quickly fading. No one would know.

After a time, a sharp knock sounded on the door. The ceremony was starting.

While Narcissa helped Bella into her shoes, I awaited our cue. There it is.

It's time.


	10. Chapter 10

**Track: Halo - Beyonce**

* * *

On a snowy December day in a beautiful ceremony, my best friend married a man she doesn't love.

Everyone was standing as Bellatrix descended the grand staircase, Narcissa and I carrying her train. At the end of the aisle, Rodolphus and Rabastan we're already standing at attention, as good looking as ever. Their eyes-and the eyes of everyone else in the room-were fixed upon us.  
Paisley Crouch, our cousin, and the flower girl, was standing to the side with Sirius and Regulus, the two ring bearers. Sirius looked as though he'd swallowed a bag of dragon dung. He'd rather be anywhere but here. I shot him a look, and he straightened up, putting a neutral expression on his face.  
As we reached the other side of the ball room, Bellatrix ascended the other grand staircase, while Cissy and I arranged her train as we had practiced. Narcissa then took her place at the bottom of the stairs, looking proud but heartbroken at the same time. I stood, tall and elegant, on the stair opposite Rabastan, just below our siblings, about to be married.

And at that moment, I wanted to call out, to yell, to scream. To take my sisters hand and run. To call off the entire wedding.

But I knew I couldn't. I couldn't do that to Bellatrix. I couldn't embarrass her with every important wizard under the sun watching. Although I might've considered it if I thought my sister would come with me when I ran for it. But she wouldn't.  
Because Bellatix is going to do this. She has to do this. It's the right thing. And she's doing it, no matter what. Even if the cost is her happiness, she's willing to make that sacrifice. My sister is determined. No one could say anything to stop her.  
If I voiced my fears, it'd make it that much harder for her.

I can't do that to Bella.

Because although the man at the other end of the aisle is not who any of us want him to be, it's still my sisters wedding day. She deserves a perfect day. I'm not going to ruin that.

One tear escaped my eye and rolled down my cheek, the product of our hopeless situation. Father saw it.  
The Minister of Magic, who was sitting in the front row next to my father, was sniffling at the beauty of the ceremony. He too, caught the tear rolling down my cheek. With that, the man began bawling at the emotion and beauty of the wedding.  
Father, thinking I was acting, sent me a wink for making the ceremony feel so convincingly emotional for the Minister. He then returned his attention to the bride and groom above me.

I looked down, Cissy was blinking furiously, fighting the tears threatening her own pale blue eyes.

Scanning the crowd, I noticed my Slytherin classmates amongst the many important faces that filled the seats. They were all sitting too far back to notice my and Narcissa's tears. Good.

Rabastan, however, was not. I turned to face him, standing on the other side of the stairs. He had noticed my tear, and he understood what it was for. Because we're all on the same boat, the kids on the stairs. We all get it. To prove my theory, the younger Lestrange gave me a sad smile before turning his head up to watch our siblings become husband and wife.

The little minister was nearly done saying the empty words he had rehearsed. They meant nothing to the five people standing on the stairs. We all knew the truth about this marriage.

Suddenly, I heard a new voice. "I do." The voice was deep and smooth. Rodolphus Lestrange had just signed away his happiness and agreed to marry my sister whom he doesn't love. The minister squeaked something else out, and everyone turned their eyes to Bellatrix expectantly. She hesitated. But only slightly. She then drew up to her full height, raised her head, put on a commanding expression, and said, in a commanding voice, "I do."

The new Mr. and Mrs. Lestrange leaned forward for a half-hearted kiss as the crowd rose to its feet. All were cheering a clapping approvingly. Mother and father looked over at the Minister beside them, clapping whole-heartedly, and smiled.

Only the five people on the stairs seemed unhappy.

* * *

The party that followed the phoney wedding was a swank soiree equal to those traditionally thrown by the Black family. It was incredibly dull.

Zabini was there, and he and Lara slow danced in the corner the whole night. It still brings a smile to my face.

I danced with Rabastan a few times, then handed him to Patricia. Thorfinn asked me to dance and I said no. However, he asked yet again, while my parents were watching. They looked at me expectantly, so I had to agree. It doesn't matter how good of a dancer he is or how good he looks while doing it. He's a git and I hate him. But I had to dance with him until Mother and Father turned their heads. As soon as they weren't looking, I made my escape. I danced with little Sirius for for the rest of the night.


	11. Chapter 11

**Track: Broken Hearted Girl - Beyonce**

* * *

My heart might be broken.  
The night of the wedding, when the wedding had ended, was the worst night of my life.

When Bellatrix left, we all cried. At least, we sisters did. Our parents said goodbye and retired into the house, not looking back once.  
But not Cissy and I.  
The three of us stood there for who knows how long, hugging and grasping each others hands. Even Rabastan was getting teary. Rodolphus just wanted to leave. He didn't want to anger Bellatrix, though.  
Finally, he linked his arm in hers and said it was time to go.  
Narcissa let go then, only because she was crying into her hands. I however, held Bella's hands for dear life, knowing I might very well be loosing her forever. Bellatrix held on too, but let go as her new husband pulled her away gently. We kept our arms outstretched just the same, Bellatrix blowing kisses at us as she was pulled further and further away. Then, just like that, my big sister was gone. Apparated away. I lost it.  
Cissy and I cried hysterically then. Because we knew. We knew this week was the happiest Bellatrix would ever be. Our sister was now joined for life with a man she did not love. One who did not love her. Happiness would not visit Bella anymore. Our best friend would never be the same.

It was like when Bellatrix graduated Hogwarts, multiplied by 20 000. We're the Black sisters. We're a team. Everything we do, we do it together. Now Bella is a Lestrange. A wife. Not a daughter and sister.

Distraught, Narcissa ran into the house, nearly running over Ripley on the way.  
Rabastan, seeing my grief, pulled me into a tight hug. And I cried in my friends arms until every tear had been shed.

* * *

The Black Christmas Ball this year was its usual dull affair.

The only difference this year is that Rodolphus Lestrange was standing at the entrance with us, waiting to greet guests.

Here's how it works:

Aunt Walburga and Uncle Orion bring their house elf, Kreacher to help our elf, Ripley. Between the two of them, they can handle butler duties.  
All the guests attending send their elves ahead of time to prepare the meal.  
After entering our manor, guests walk from the entryway into the entrance hall. There, my family greets them. Or rather, Father greets them, and introduces the rest of us so we can curtsey politely, hardly able to move in our lavish gowns. This year, however, Father made sure to introduce his daughter, Bellatrix, and her _husband_ Rodolphus. Rodolphus _Lestrange_.  
Then, when they enter the ball room, Uncle Orion and Aunt Walburga are there to greet them with Sirius and Regulus. I often catch Sirius making faces at guests when their backs are turned. The little turkey.

Other than that, it was the same stiff, boring dancing and speeches as it always was. At least the food was good.

* * *

I've never been happier to return to school. The manor is quiet and lifeless without Bellatrix. It's as though somebody died.  
At school, at least I can focus on familiar things to get my mind off my sister.

Like Transfiguration, for instance.

I'm currently sitting in the library with my cousin, Paisley. We're each doing our respective studying.  
This is what we usually do when we're together, Paisley and I.  
We study alone, together.  
Makes sense huh?  
We usually throw in some light gossip while revising, however today Paisley seems to be in her own world. She hardly notices anything she's so intent on reading her Transfiguration notes. Maybe I'm not the only one who sucks at Transfiguration?  
"Paisley?" I say for the third time. She finally hears me and he head shoots up.  
"What? What did I miss!" She asks, startled. It's an unusual look for the usually put-together pureblood Ravenclaw I've come to know.  
"If you stare at those notes any more intensely you'll burn a hole through them. What's up?" I ask  
"I was ill yesterday and missed McGonagall's lecture. I have to learn this all before tomorrows class or I'll fall behind." He said  
"So, where did you get those notes?" I asked, suddenly curious. Who can take notes worthy of Paisley?  
"Andromeda, can you keep a secret?" Paisley whispers, leaning across the table.  
"Yes." I breath  
"Ted Tonks. He's a fabulous note taker and very good at Transfiguration. We take notes for one another if one of us ever needs it." She whispered. "But I promise you, cousin, it's nothing more than that. He's a mudblood and I've never had a real conversation with him. He's just my note taker."

Ted Tonks. There's that mudblood, in my head again. With all the Bellatrix happenings, I completely forgot about him. Good. I don't need that confusing mudblood. I turn to Paisley, who looks frightfully nervous about being hexed and blown off the family tree. I however, am more accepting than my aunt Walburga.  
"If you're merely sharing notes, Paisley, I don't see too much of a problem. You don't want to be caught by anyone else though. Cissy would be okay, but anyone else would tell on you. As long as it doesn't go past note-taking, your secret is safe with me." I say, easing her fears. My cousin looks as though someone has just saved her from the Whomping Willow. Hell, the Whomping Willow would be preferable to an angry Aunt Walburga.

Paisley, who's never been much of a hugger, reaches across the table and gives me a hug.


	12. Chapter 12

**Track: Not in Love - Crystal Castles**

* * *

I, unlike Paisley, am a terrible notetaker. So I still suck at Transfiguration. Which is why I'm currently in my favorite unused classroom, practicing.  
I'm still working on that stupid goblet/rat!  
It's starting to get a face though?  
I'm making a bit of progress, so I'm in a good mood when I hear footsteps. I use a vanishing spell (non-verbally. Impressive? I think so.) on my goblet/rat and prepare to be found by a teacher. No matter, I never get in trouble. Just bring up Bellatrix and they shut up on the spot.

The door opens, and who should walk in but-

Thorfinn Rowle.  
Again.  
Shit!

I was expecting a teacher, so I stowed my wand. I go to reach for it but-  
"_Accio Andromeda's wand_!" the good looking Slytherin git in front of me says sharply. Great. I am now defenseless.  
"Thorfinn Rowle! You give me my wand _right now_!" I shout  
"Rodolphus had to wait years for Bellatrix to put out, I'm not that patient." He growled. "Now, we can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way. Your choice, Andromeda."  
"Rowle! You give me my wand and then never speak to me again you-" but that's as far as I get before he tackles me.

"_Silencio!_" He whispers before I can scream. I can no longer make a sound. Then he claims my lips with his.  
He's on top of me, big, strong, heavy. I can't do anything. I'm powerless against the seventeen year old beater.  
He's kissing me everywhere, running his hands up and down my waist and chest while pinning my down. I know what's happening, and being a Black cannot get me out of this mess.

I refuse to let it happen to me.

He's attacking my lips again, so I open my mouth slightly. Yep, sure enough he rams his tongue down my throat. Gross. I open my mouth wide, and bite down. Hard.

He yells in pain and pulls back. I try to hit him with my now free arms, try to push him off. Put it's no use.

"Stupid cunt!" He cries. He slaps me, and then punches me in the ribs.  
Hard.

I scream in pain, but no sound comes out. Rowle returns to kissing every exposed inch of my body against my will, his hands trailing up my shirt.

I know I've lost. There's no way I can stop him now.

Suddenly, a flash of red blinds me, and Thorfinn goes limp on top of me.  
Just, goes limp.

I look up in time to see a set of school robes swishing out of sight.

A person.  
A student.  
A flash of red.  
A knocked out Rowle.

Who just stupefied Thorfinn Rowle?

* * *

By the time I heaved Thorfinn's limp form off of me, my savior was long gone. I'm too tired to feel panicked about whoever it was telling on Rowle. I'm just glad they showed up when they did.  
After calming down in the prefect bathroom, I realize I should get back to the common room to avoid suspicion. After all, Rowle will probably be in that classroom until morning.  
I cast a decent dliusionment charm on myself to ensure that no one notices my arrival.  
"Basilisk." I say the password. What does a basilisk have to do with our house? I guess it's just a random snake name.  
The door opens and I enter the common room. The scene that greets me is not a cheerful one.

Riley Casavant doing a white-trash version of a strip tease on the common room table. Most of the boys are watching her eagerly. I notice Rabastan is missing from the group. Good. One odd thing though, is that Lucius Malfoy is also absent from the group of goggling males.

Truth be told, I don't know Lucius very well. I never cared for him, so I don't know if he'd be interested in watching Riley take her pants off. I just assumed he would be. I suppose I'm judging him, but whatever.

Either way, I'm here to break up the party.

With me safely hidden behind my skilled dilusionment charm, I point my wand at the skank on the table and wordlessly fire a bat-bogey hex at her. The scene is most comical. Riley, who was trying to pull off sexy, is failing miserably while trying to fight off her own boogers that are now attacking her face. While everyone is distracted by the amusing sight, I slip past them all and down to my dormitory.

Lara is asleep, curtains closed around her. Patricia is no-where to be found. She must be with Rabastan... Dawn is also missing, but I don't care where she is as long as it's far away from me. With that cheerful thought, I change into my pjs and retire for the night. Even though it's 1 in the morning.

Welcome to life in Slytherin House.

* * *

I wake up the following morning wishing I had gotten more sleep. Me along with every other member of my house. I think Lara's the only one who got any sleep. Even so, she's still as grumpy as the rest of us. She already misses Zabini.  
The day is uneventful and long. But we manage.  
I've successfully avoided Rowle all day. Since I never cared for him to begin with, it's not hard. My day was going well. Dull, but a good day nonetheless.

Until Dolohov tracked me down.

I knew it was bad the moment he stopped me in the hallway off of the loo.

"I know what you did." He growled darkly.  
"Excuse you?" I replied. I mean, his best mate tried to rape me yesterday, but not sure what exactly _I_ did.  
"We all know what you're doing, Andromeda." He said, frustrated.  
"Well then, enlighten me, oh all-knowing one, because you seem to have it all figured out." I snapped.  
"It's the same as what Bellatrix did. You're sisters; no one should be surprised. But I am. I never expected it from you, Andromeda." He said  
"Expected what, for the love of Merlin!" I'm not in the mood for games. This git should just get to the point before I hex him.  
"Cut the crap Andromeda! You're just playing with him! You're stringing him along for your personal play-toy and then turning him down for kicks! We both know it! I wont let you do that to Thorfinn!"

Ah shit!  
Did he_ really_ just say that?  
"Oh Merlin, what did that git dream up now?" I asked, looking up at the ceiling in exasperation.  
"Thorfinn told me everything." He said darkly.  
I stop dead in my tracks.  
I recover before he even notices though.  
"Whatever do you mean?" I asked, calm on the outside but terrified on the inside.  
"He told me. You were both leaning in for the kiss, and then you pulled back and slapped him in the face, crying rape! rape! and ran away. Then one of your cronies stupefied him! What do you think of that Black!" He's genuinely angry. Yet despite his anger and the lies that Thorfinn is spreading, I burst out laughing. Dolohov goes ballistic.  
"Are you even serious right now! You're actually laughing! I was wrong! You're worse than Bellatrix! You're such a coldhearted bitch, Andromeda! I never would've thought. I mean, are you serious!"  
No, idiot. Sirius is my cousin.  
I laugh even harder at my own joke.

"Alright, listen up Dolohov," I say with my newly reinstated commanding presence. "Whatever your best mate told you is a bag of dragon dung. I'd kiss the giant squid before I'd willingly kiss Rowle. You can start following him around if you'd like, attach yourselves with spello tape. I have no interest in the git. Never have, never will. Did someone hex Rowle yesterday? Yep. I have no idea who it was but I can't say I'm too bothered, as long as it got you bastard of a best mate away from me." I mad now. How dare he! I could go tell Slughorn right now! "Now, you can go tell your mate, Thorfinn, that he's a lying git because what he told you is as far fetched as an old hags tale. And the next time you see Rowle, tell him to stay away from me and that if he ever bothers me again, he'll regret it. And I'll make sure, by the power of the House of Black, that you regret it too."  
And with that, I turn and strut away from a livid Dolohov. I can do anything.


	13. Chapter 13

**Track: Not Over You - Gavin DeGraw**

* * *

Transfiguration._ noun  
__-A marked change in form or appearance; a metamorphosis._

The burden of my existence.

Transfiguration is taking up far more of my time and energy than what is humanly healthy.  
I spend way too much time worrying about it. I don't worry about much, so why do I worry so much about Transfiguration? It's just a class taught by a Gryffindor that I'm never going to use in my future as a wife and socialite.

There are no words for the feeling I get when I say that.

I mean, I know my future. I've always known it. No Divination required. Because I'm a Black and all I'm going to do is get married to some Pureblood gentleman and have an heir. That's my life.  
Did I decide it?  
No.  
Did I agree to it?  
No.  
Does it matter?  
Next question.

* * *

I'm sitting in the demon class itself, and McGonagall is talking on and on. I'm trying to listen, I always _try_ to listen, but I just can't follow anything that woman says about the blasted subject!  
However, I hear the word "partners" and instantly find miraculous listening skills.  
I'll partner with Lara since Patricia and Rabastan will probably partner up.

Listen, Andromeda!

I tune back into McGonagall's crisp voice, who is still talking about Transfiguration partners. It's not that complicated lady? I mean, even _**I**_ understand this part of this stupid class.

"Now, most teachers bow to your wishes of remaining with members of your own house as partners at all times. I however, think that inter-house cooperation would be beneficial to all of you. There will be no whining, complaining or screaming. Do I make myself clear?"

Wait, what?  
Am I the only one who missed that?  
SPEAK ENGLISH PLEASE!  
And why did she look at me when she said screaming? What am I going to scream about?

"I shall now select your partners for my class." The woman finishes.

Wait a minute...  
AH SHIT!  
_I don't wanna partner up with a Hufflepuff!_  
_I mean, what the hell is a Hufflepuff anyway!_

I become suddenly aware of the eyes of the other Slytherin's upon me. Shit times a thousand. They're expecting me to pull a Bellatrix and tell McGonagall that she's an insult to the wizarding world for even considering the idea of partnering with mudbloods.  
This is McGonagall! Not Slughorn! I don't wanna get expelled!

Before I can finish that thought however, Demetrius Nott seems to have seen an opportunity to raise his social status. His wand at his side, Nott speaks directly to McGonagall.

_"There is no way we're going to soil ourselves fraternizing with these mudbloods! It's an abomination against everything we stand for!"_ He says defiantly.

McGonagalls face remains neutral. Calmly, she states: "Seeing as that is the case, Nott, you will be removed from my NEWT class."  
_"Wadda ya mean! You can't kick me out of class!"_ Nott is hysterically yelling by now.  
"As a matter of fact, I can. Now, kindly remove yourself from this classroom." Our teacher replied.  
_"No mudblood can kick me outta class! I've worked my ass off to get into the NEWT class!"_  
Did he really just call a teacher a mudblood?  
Real mature Demetrius.  
Honestly, that's the go-to insult of nearly my entire class. Any half-bloods who they don't like are called mudbloods since my housemates aren't intelligent enough to come up with a legit argument.

'Nott, remove yourself from this class and report to the Headmaster immediately." How is McGonagall still calm!  
"_Make me!_" Oh Demetrius, when will you ever learn?  
Suddenly, Nott's chair vanished beneath him and he fell to the floor. We would all be laughing hysterically if we weren't in shock.

"Headmaster's office _or else_!" Minerva said sharply. So sharply, she could cut down the Womping Willow with a single word.

Speechless, frightened and embarrassed, Demetrius Nott stood up and stalked out of class.

"Now, are there any other complaints involving partners?" McGonagall said, scanning the Slytherins, almost willing any of us to speak up. But no one said a word.  
Satisfied, McGonagall summoned a bowl from thin air containing the names of our NEWT class. Names were drawn randomly. I'm praying I get Paisley if we have to pair with other houses.

"Selwyn, Smith!" Aw cmon! Smith is an ass, but at least he's a pureblood?  
"Crouch, Eaton!" COME ON!  
"Casavant, Lestrange!" OH SHIT. Patricia will not be happy.  
"Which Casavant!" Calls Lara  
"Riley! Moving on!" McGonagall replies irritably.  
How did the Casavant twins even get into NEWT Transfiguration! They're stupid!

"Black,"  
suddenly McGonagall has my undivided attention  
"and Tonks!"  
The whole room is dead silent.

This is not happening.

* * *

"She's mental! Absolutely mental!" Lara yelled, the moment we were safely back in the Slytherin common room.  
"She's got to be joking!" Antonin agreed.  
"Lets recap all of the terrible things that happend during one class, shall we?" Patricia said with sarcastic cheerfulness.

"I'm not getting my Transfiguration NEWT..." Nott whined.  
"My partner's an asshole..." Lara started.  
"Mine's a whore..." Rabastan continued.  
"And Andromeda's is a mudblood." Patricia finished. That shut everybody up fairly quickly.

The other Slytherins in lower years are all sitting, mouths gaping open in disbelief. Narcissa looks scared.  
"So what are you going to do about it, Andromeda?" Says Goyle, who was to stupid to make it into NEWT Transfiguration.  
"You're going to talk to the bitch teacher then?" Demetrius suggested.  
"Since I sort of want to complete my NEWTs, I can't really say anything." I stated.  
"But, he's a mudblood! Rabastan exclaimed in horror.  
"According to Nott, so is McGonagall." Dolohov said with amusement.  
"I'll get kicked out for sure if I so much think about how inferior mudbloods are, so switching partners is out. But really kids, I think I can handle a stupid Hufflepuff." I say commandingly.  
"But-" Thorfinn starts.  
"I think Andromeda can handle herself just fine around filth like Tonks. Just make sure you don't accidentally touch him, Honey." Patricia says confidently. I smile at her gratefully, but really I could hug her. Instead, I scan the group of my housemates gathered around me, daring them to question me further. Speechless.

I hate Transfiguration.


	14. Chapter 14

I'm currently enjoying a peaceful Transfiguration class with my new partner.

I know right? I must be joking!

I'm dead Sirius kids! (See what I did there?)

Tonks and I have this partner thing down to a science. We merely co-exist, so rather than actually working together, we split whatever work we have in half. Actually, it's not really half. He always does more because I just can't keep up. He thinks it's cuz I'm lazy, and that's fine with me. I can live with a mudblood calling me lazy, as long as he doesn't realize that I truly can't grasp Transfiguration.  
I'm working my _ass_ off to keep up to everyone else. It doesn't help that he's awesome at Transfiguration!

If we worked together, wouldn't that mean he could help me improve my not-so-great marks in this not-so-great subject?  
It doesn't matter, either way, because the Mudblood and I are _never_ working together. We're both keeping our mouths shut about this unfortunate pairing, so there's really nothing McGonagall can do. I mean, she can't _make_ us socialize.

So I think Tonks and I are both at peace with the situation. Unhappy- but at peace.

We're going about our usual you-don't-talk-to-me-and-I-don't-talk-to-you routine that enables us to survive this daily torture known as Transfiguration class, and all is as it should be.

And then McGonagall shows up.

This can't be good.

"Ugh, Tonks, Black, I sent Rowle and Smith to get more canaries from Professor Kettleburn, but they've yet to return and their partners are growing understandably impatient." McGonagall said briskly  
I look across the room. My, Lara _does_ look annoyed.  
"Now, I need you two to head to the grounds where Professor Kettleburn is teaching his Care of Magical Creatures lesson. Hopefully you'll run into Rowle and Smith along the way. I expect your prompt return so _no dawdling_. You may go." And with that, Minerva McGonagall was already walking away, towards Thurman Lovelace who had just inflated his poor parrot to an unnatural size.

Tonks and I rise at the same time-weird-and wordlessly, exit the classroom.

* * *

This is mental.

So, basically, I'm on a misson to search a giant magical castle for two seventeen-year-old boys who I hate-one of them being a rapist-with a mudblood who makes me very uncomfortable as my partner in crime.

Completely mental.

We make our way to grounds (never saying a word) only to find that the boys had already left with the canaries. Tonks and I return to the castle. Finally, the boy speaks:  
"Let's split up and cover the two routes back to the Transfiguration classroom. If we don't find them, well then, we tried." Then he walks away, without waiting for my approval.  
To say this bothers me is an understatement. People_ always _need my okay, it's just how things are in my circle.

However, I can't be too angry, his walking away means he knows I can handle myself. Excellent.  
I've hidden my extreme anxiety over Rowle and his rapist activities rather well then.  
I should stop loosing myself in my thoughts when I'm walking down corridors alone. It usually leads to trouble.

The next thing that happens proves that thought correct.  
Someone grabs me from behind and shoves me up against the wall.  
We meet again, Thorfinn Rowle.  
Shit.

"Afternoon, Andromeda. Have you met Smith?" My assaulter asks, gesturing to the haughty-looking Hufflepuff behind him.  
"Unfortunately." I spit in a very Bellatrix fashion, my dislike for the boy growing the longer he stands there.  
"Quite the firecracker you got there, Thorfinn." Smith says lazily, eyebrow raised. I'd hex him if my arms weren't pinned.

"Indeed. Now, back to the matter at hand. Andromeda, why are you making things so difficult? Playing hard to get got old a long time ago, Sweetheart." Rowle says.  
"_It's not 'hard to get' you sick pig, I'm jut not interested! Now get your filthy hands off of me!_" I spit, furious.  
Now he's mad too. "_You pathetic cunt! I'm so sick of you! What does it take with you! Huh!"_ He yells angrily.  
"_I've already told your little bestie to tell you to never talk to me again! Now leave me be you psycho rapist!_" I holler back.  
Suddenly, his face grows dark. His voice lowered-too low-Rowle says: "Who helped you that night, Andromeda? Who stunned me? Huh?"  
"_I don't know who it was_!" I spit back  
"_More lies! Cut the shit Andromeda, I'm not here to play games! Who stunned me!"_ He bellows.  
"I_ don't know you blithering idiot!_ But whoever it was, I like them more than I'll ever like you!" I yell.

Then his fist connects with my face.

The initial blow combined with the effect of my face being sandwiched between the hard wall and his knuckles make for immense pain. I bring my hands to my throbbing face.

"_You'll learn eventually, stupid bitch! And I'll figure who your little friend is, and they'll be sorry!_" Rowle spits.

My face still pounding in pain, I draw up to my full height and slap him- hard. I then turn and run.  
I run down the corridor, around the corner and-

-straight into Ted Tonks.

Ted Tonks, who was standing around the corner the entire time and heard everything. Ted Tonks, who now has a close-up view of my quickly bruising face. I grab his arm-desperate times call for desperate measures, I'll wash my hands later-and run far from Thorfinn and Smith. Satisfied that we're far from them, I turn to face the mudblood who saw it all. Wand pointed at his perfectly proportioned face, I say:  
"You will tell no one what you heard, _understand_!"  
"Y-your face.." He starts, looking concerned.  
"_Never mind that!_ You'll tell no one, or else! Got it!" I spit.  
"No, actually, I don't 'got it'! That asshole just punched you in the face! And that's after he tried raping you in an abandoned classroom!" Tonks yells back.

It takes us both a moment to process what he just said. Wait, how did he know about-

"It was you! St-stunned Rowle, it was you!" I splutter. If I wasn't scared before, I am now. Tonks looks deeply distressed, he clearly wanted to keep his involvement quiet. Despite needing to keep Tonks quiet, I do the only thing I can physically and emotionally manage at the moment-

I run.

* * *

**It's complete rubbish, I know. Chapter 15 will be better, promise!**

**-xoxo WishIWasAWeasley**


	15. Chapter 15

I ran straight to the hospital wing. My eye was put right in no time. No one would ever know that a nasty, multi-colored bruise had once graced my haughty-looking face.

No one but Ted Tonks.

That blasted mudblood! Why can't he just stay out of my life! Lately he seems to be popping up _everywhere_, without even trying! I'll just have to try harder to keep that boy at a distance.

* * *

My resolutions never hold for long, and this one is no exception. It's only a day after the worst Transfiguration class of my life. (I know, right? Every Transfiguration class is horrible. Getting punched in the face by a rapist with a good-looking mudblood watching just takes the cake. I'm going to pretend I didn't say good-looking.) Only one day later, I'm forced to face the boy again.

Quidditch.

Avada me now.

* * *

I'm headed down to the locker rooms to change into my Quidditch robes, already finished my breakfast. Normaly, I wouldn't think much of a match against Hufflepuff. Their only good player is the seeker. Hufflepuffs are excellent finders. But other than that, the team really isn't that great. There are two reasons I'm nervous for todays match:

1. The Hufflepuff seeker is quite good, possibly better than our new seeker. Little Carlile Selwyn, Laras little brother, is in fourth year. He's done quite well up too this point, but Ravenclaws seeker is rubbish and Gryffindors regular seeker was out injured. Hufflepuff, however, is playing their regular seeker, a seventh year who hasn't failed to catch the snitch yet this year. Actually, I'm pretty sure he's the captain.

2. There's a certain light-haired Hufflepuff who I can't seem to avoid who will undoubtedly be at the match, thus destroying my resolution to stay away from him.

It just dawned on me that Tonks, the very boy I've been so eager to ignore, is the fabulous Hufflepuff seeker who I've been so worried about.

* * *

I present to you, the Slytherin Quidditch Team.

**Keeper: Evan Rosier, 6th year**

**Chasers: Andromeda Black, 7th year | Rabastan Lestrange, 7th year | Lucius Malfoy, 6th year**

**Beaters: Thorfinn Rowle, 7th year | Antonin Dolohov, 7th year**

**Seeker: Carlile Selwyn, 4th year**

Rabastan is our captain. It wasn't much of a contest. Rabastan is skilled and has power in the outside world. When you're in Slytherin house, that's enough to make you royalty.  
Okay, I'm exaggerating. You need the last name "Black". _Then_ you're royalty.  
But next year, they're going to have quite a time picking a captain between Lucius and Evan. I'm glad I wont be there to see it. Poor Cissy will be, though.

Currently, Captain Lestrange is giving our team their pre-game pep-talk. That's what we call it, but really it's just an assembly of cheating strategies. Because that's how we win. I don't partake in much cheating, it's unladylike. I cut people off now and then, but other then that I just catch the ball like a boss and throw it through the hoop. I tune back into the conversation taking place in the Slytherin locker rooms:  
"Most people may call it unfair. _**You know what's fair?** The team that wants it most wins; **that's** fair! So today, we have to play our hardest, because we **want** this! **We want it the most!** So let's go show them!" _Rabastan is giving his usual speel about "real" fairness. Always their excuse for cheating. Who cares, we win.  
"Alright team! This is it! We'll cream those Hufflepuffs! Who's with me!" Rabastan hollered. Our team erupted into roars af approval along with numerous war cries, meant to intimidate our opponents who couldn't hear us anyway. My housemates are idiots. Oh well. Let the games begin.

* * *

The score is now sitting at 140-10. Hufflepuff's are a joke. You'd think they could _find_ their way off the pitch and save us all the time and energy of a match, but noooo, they insist on wasting my Saturday. Their entire house is waiting on Tonks to come to the rescue and catch the snitch, as usual. Us snakes, however, anticipated as such. Tonks hasn't had more than a spare moment to search for the snitch, due to the excessive body slams and bludgers he's received from my team mates. Yet, despite all the time he's had, Carlile _still_ hasn't found the ruddy thing yet! The other boys are getting antsy, they can't hold Tonks off forever. I decide that the best course of action right now is to rack up more points. I make eye contact with Lucius, Rabastan is still chasing Tonks in circles. Taking my cue, Lucius shoots off towards the poor Hufflepuff who happens to be carrying the quaffle. I speed down the pitch towards the Hufflepuff goal posts, taking my usual position.  
Lucius comes rocketing down the pitch, red quaffle in hand. Dolohov shoots a bludger at the lone Beater who stands between Lucius and me. The boy goes spinning off-course, doing anything to avoid colliding with the bludger and the ground. I hardly notice, however, as Lucius is about to pass me the ball.  
Back-and-forth, back-and-forth, back-and-forth, Lucius Malfoy and I whip the red ball back and forth at the speed of light with relative ease. The keeper can't keep her eyes focused on the fast moving red orb. Then, out of nowhere, I take the quaffle, wind my arm up, and send the ball spiraling through the upper hoop at top speed. It shoots through like a bullet, and I know I've just lived up to my Quidditch nick-name "Guns". I shoot balls like bullets. So all I really do is wait by the goal hoops for Rabastan or Lucius to pass the quaffle to me, then rocket it past the keeper for an easy ten points.  
The score now sits at 150-10. Dangit. The Slytherins still need another ten points. If we get to 160, the Hufflepuffs can't possibly win by simply catching the snitch.

My thoughts are interrupted when something catches my attention out of the corner of my eye.  
Little Carlile Selwyn has always been a good flyer, so why is his broom rocketing all over like an out-of-control first year?  
I'm not the only one who's noticed. From the crowd, you can hear cries of "jinxed his broom!" "who'd do such a thing?" and "poor Carlile!" Poor Carlile indeed. I'm about to go help, but suddenly I hear "Andromeda!" I look up to see Rabastan and Lucius waving wildly, gesturing behind me. I turn to see an angry bludger, rocketing towards me.

My mind-and limbs-freeze upon seeing the rocketing bludger screaming my way. I'm expecting the worst, trying to prepare myself for the pain, but no pain comes.

Instead, a great yellow blur streaks in front of me, absorbing the full impact of the bludger.

What just happened?

I look down. There, sprawled some twenty feet below my feet lies the unmoving body of Ted Tonks.


	16. Chapter 16

**Track: Shot in the Dark - Augustana**

* * *

The eyes of the entire stadium move down and focus upon the limp form of the hero of the Hufflepuffs. Ted Tonks, in his seeker robes, is sprawled, unmoving, un the ground below. Broken.  
Carliles broom has stopped jerking dangerously. His attacker is focused on the too-still Hufflepuff twenty feet below us. The pitch is deathly silent. Too silent.

Then, someone lets out a scream.

Desdemona Biggs, a seventh year Hufflepuff is now tearing down the stands, her lungs still hard at work screaming bloody murder. She isn't even aloud on the pitch, however, as McGonagall holds the teenage girl back. Madam Pomfrey is rushing from the stands, accompanied by Professor Sprout, the younger head of Hufflepuff House. The Hufflepuff Quidditch team has now abandoned their posts and flown down to be with their injured captain.  
Before long, Madame Pomfrey is leaving the pitch, while levitating an un-moving Tonks. Professor Sprout, along with the Hufflepuff Quidditch Team, follow her out.

Finally, the commentator breaks the silence: "Well, I guess this means Slytherin wins." he says quietly into his microphone. My team lets out a yell and everyone partakes in a series of high-fives. But it's a subdued, glum affair for even us. It's not because the mudblood got hurt, I mean, all is fair in love and Quidditch. The thing is, we won. Rah. But we didn't _really_ win. Our opponent lost, but we didn't win. We didn't work for it, or even try. Stupid Tonks has to ruin everything.

* * *

I hate that mudblood.

I hate how he lets his hair fall wherever, yet it always looks carelessly perfect.  
I hate how he's the only non-Black (except Rabastan) who's not afraid of me.  
I hate how he has bad timing.  
I hate how his bad timing always turns out to be good timing.  
I hate how he's great at Transfiguration.  
I hate how he's defies the Hufflepuff stereotypes.  
I hate how he's better at Quidditch than me.  
I hate how he knows my biggest secret yet doesn't show any signs of telling.  
I hate how he doesn't judge me the same way everyone else does.  
I hate how I can't get this mudblood out of my head!

And I hate that I'm worried about him in the hospital wing.  
I hate that I feel guilty that we put him there.

I hate that I don't hate him.

* * *

I'm reading quietly in the library with Narcissa and Paisley when Professor Slughorn comes lumbering in. We pay him no mind and continue reading. That is, until he waddles over to our table.  
"Ah, Miss Black. I'm afraid I must take you from your studies, the Headmaster has summoned you to the hospital wing." The potions master said, looking at me.  
"Why would Professor Dumbledore ask to see me, sir?" I ask formally.  
"It appears you were nearest to Mr. Tonks when his accident occurred, Miss. Black." He said.  
"And..?" I really don't see where the portly man is going with this. I'm also more annoyed than I should be. Stupid Tonks! Go away!  
"Well, you see Miss Black, Tonks seems to have lost his entire memory of the incident. Madam Pomfrey was hoping that you could help jog it a little for him." He explained.  
"I may have been closest, but I didn't see much. It was all a blur, I don't think I'd be of much assistance, sir." I replied. I have no desire to go visit Tonks anyway.  
"I think you should go, Andromeda. I want to know how much longer I'll be taking his Transfiguration notes." Paisley whispered from beside me. Cissy, who was sitting across the table from me, was frowning.  
"Very well, I shall speak to Madam Pomfrey about any information I may have, though I seriously doubt I'll be of much assistance. After you, sir." I said. And with that, we headed off to the Hospital Wing.

* * *

The doors to the hospital wing opened, revealing the scene before me.

A group of people were gathered around the far bed, their backs to the door, and me. However, upon hearing Slughorns loud waddling, they all turned in our direction.

Madam Pomfrey and Professor Sprout didn't notice us and continued fussing around the one occupied bed. The others however, couldn't miss me. A group of students made up of several Hufflepuff quidditch players along with Desdemona Biggs turned to face me, arms crossed. Aw, they think they're intimidating! Cute.

Intimidation doesn't work against a Black.

Slughorn, sensing the tension, waddles around the wall of Hufflepuffs to the only occupied bed in the room. I remain by te door, head held high. I'm not about to lose a staring contest with a bunch of losers from the looser house.

"Miss Black?" We all look up to meet the eyes of Professor Sprout, Head of Hufflepuff House.  
"Yes?" I reply.  
"We are in need of your assistance. Professor Dumbledore believes you may have knowledge most beneficial to Mr. Tonks here. Professor Slughorn explained everything to you, I presume?" The short woman asked.  
"Yes, he has." I say.  
"Very good. You lot, out!" This time it was Madam Pomfrey who spoke up.

"What do you mean, 'out'! We've got to stay with him!"  
"Yeah! Those Slytherins already tried to do him in once! They'll try it again no doubt!"  
"We're not leaving Ted!"  
The fruitless protests of the Hufflepuffs were short lived, as they were soon ushered out by Professor Sprout. Desdemona however, had to be drug out.  
"_I won't leave him! I promised I wouldn't! Especially not with her! You can't make me!_" Her protests soon faded as the doors to the hospital wing closed, leaving me alone with the sleeping Ted Tonks.

I look down and meet his very awake hazel eyes. So much for the sleeping mudblood. Shit.  
The blond seventeen-year-old attempts to sit up, but fails as he slouches back in pain. My guilt trip returns with full force.  
Why do I feel guilty about a mudblood getting hurt in quidditch! It wasn't my fault and people get hurt all the time!  
But there's a part of me that knows that there's more to it then that. Finally, I speak to the injured blond.

"Um, I'm sorry you got hit? They want me to jog your memory, but I really wont be much help." I say truthfully.  
"I know." He replies.  
Wait, huh?  
"I lied. I remember perfectly what happened. It's you who needs an explanation, not me." He whispers.  
Okay, now I'm really confused.  
"There's really nothing to explain. You got hit by a bludger aimed by a Slytherin during a Quidditch match. No explanation necessary." I say, confused.  
"That's all true, but you're missing something." Tonks says.  
"What?" I ask.

"They weren't aiming for me, they were aiming for you."


	17. Chapter 17

**Track: Warrant - Foster the People**

* * *

"They weren't aiming for me, they were aiming for you."

He must be joking.

Who does this mudblood think he's fooling?

"That's absurd! Do I look stupid to you, Hufflepuff?" I snapped  
"Not in the slightest. Do you look mean? Yes. But definitely not stupid." He replied, looking me right in the eye.  
"Excuse you? Look, you're not fooling anyone here, so if you're done wasting my time, I have better things to do." I turn on my heel towards the door. His comment on me looking mean bothers me a little. I mean, I _know_ I look a bit mean, but he's the first person to ever say so _to my face!  
_"Stop." He says. It's a suggestion, a request and a command, all rolled in one simple word. Stop. So I do. I turn to face the rugged blond mudblood lying in the hospital bed. For an injured guy, he managed quite a forceful voice. I'm still slightly taken aback that I listened. I don't take orders from anyone! Except Bella. And my parents. Other than family, I am my own master! So why did I listen to this lying mudblood? It irritates me slightly.  
"You listened." He remarks lightly, eyebrow raised in surprise.  
_I just want this to be over! "Yes, it shocks me too. Now get on with it, I have places to be." _I snap._  
_"Do you believe me?" He inquires.  
"No." I reply. This kid must've gotten hit worse than we thought.  
"Fine." He says defiantly before bringing his wand to his temple. What in Merlin's name is he-

The good-looking blonde is extracting a strange silvery substance from his temple. With his free hand, he grabs a bowl of chocolate frogs (from his quidditch team) and dumps the contents on the table. He then deposits the silvery not-water-not-gas into it. I observe in awe as the the contents of the bowl swirls magically. The boy has just made a pensieve.

"Watch." He says, looking at the bowl in front of him. I don't trust him. I won't trust him. I shouldn't trust him. But I do. I lower my face into the silvery depths.

* * *

I'm sitting on a broom. Behind me, Tonks is looking a little dizzy as he clutches the handle of our broom. Why are we on a broom? I look up. I front of us is the then-healthy Ted Tonks, bobbing on his broom, scoping out the golden snitch. Suddenly, memory-Tonks looks up, alarmed. Real-Tonks and I follow his stare to the end of the pitch. There's Dolohov and Rowle, whispering. They're also staring at something. My eyes follow theirs until I see what those two creeps are looking at. It hits me like a ton of bricks. Me. They're staring a memory-me. I give an involuntary shudder. I hope the mudblood didn't notice. Why are those two whispering about me? Finally, they share a nod, and look up. Dolohov nudges Rowle before backing behind his best mate. Rowle and Dolohov look my way and share a malicious grin before Rowle winds up his arms, his beaters bat raised at the ready. A bludger comes streaming towards his built frame. He winds up and makes contact with the ball, sending it screaming upwards, straight towards memory-me.

He didn't lie.

A sudden movement makes me jump. Memory-Tonks shoots past us. He's rocketing down the pitch at record speed. Has he seen the snitch? Wait, he's going straight towards-

In front of me, I see the memory of Ted Tonks streaming across the pitch right in front of the memory of me. The teenage boy has perfect timing-the bludger connects with his side, lifting him violently from his broom and sending him sailing over my head and through the air. I watch-heart in my throat-as his lifeless form crashes to the ground twenty feet below me. He doesn't move.

Real Tonks-who's been sitting behind me the whole time-grips my shoulder. The memory-world I've been so immersed in dissolves around me.

* * *

I don't know what to say.  
What am I supposed to say!  
Maybe if I could actually wrap my head around this mess I'd be able to ask a useful question!  
I decide to play make-believe since I don't want to face the truth.

"Sorry that you saw the snitch at the wrong moment." I sigh.  
"That's what I told my mates, actually. But we both know that that's not what happened." He said, looking into the make-shift pensieve.  
"Ted, why did you take that bludger for me?" I know it's true. He takes several minutes of silence before answering.

"It's my fault he punched you."

I can't take this.

I run.

* * *

**I know! I know! You've waited how long! And this is all you get! I'm sorry guys, I haven't had time to write in like, a month. But here I am again! I can't wait to write again!**

**-xoxo IWishIWasAWeasley**


	18. Chapter 18

**Track: Augustana - Shot in the Dark**

* * *

I ran. I ran from my problems just like I always do. How very Gryffindor of me. I just can't do it. I can't face him. I can't face Tonks. I can't face what he witnessed, what he knows. It makes everything real. I may have to accept that this whole thing isn't some terrible nightmare.

"It's my fault he punched you."

He knows.

Not only does he know, but he knows why. He knows why Thorfinn Rowle punched me in the face. He knows as well as I do that Throfinn smoked me in the face because someone stunned him that night.

"It's my fault he punched you."

And suddenly, everything clicks.

The robes sweeping out of the classroom, my rescuer fleeing the scene, it was him.

It was Tonks.

Ted Tonks.

It was always Ted Tonks.

Ted Tonks stunned Throfinn Rowle.

* * *

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, Andromeda Black: Master of Evasion. I've avoided pretty much everyone all day. I don't have to try to avoid Tonks, he's still in the hospital wing. I heard two Hufflepuffs discussing it.  
Woah, woah, woah now! Don't go loosing your head, pathetic mudblood! I don't really care about what looser Hufflepuffs have to say, and NO, I don't go around listening in case someone is talking about that stupid lying Ted Tonks. Those idiots just talk too loud.  
I know I'll have to accept that Tonks wasn't lying sooner or later, but I prefer later.  
It doesn't matter though, because the source of my mental instability is stuck under Pomfrey's nose in the Hospital Wing.  
Maybe today isn't such a waste after all!

Then again, I just remembered that we have a Transfiguration practical exam tomorrow. Yep, that means you'll have to do the actual magic in front of McGonagall. Joy.

Avada Kedavra me, anyone?

* * *

I suck at Transfiguration. So guess where I am now?

An empty classroom.

What am I doing?  
I don't need to answer that!

I hear the door open behind me.

No.

This cannot be happening.

Why don't I learn?  
That's how bad I am at Transfiguration.  
I hear the door close. My heart drops, everything in my very being tightens.

This ends; tonight.

I whirl around, shouting _"Petrificus Totalus!" _The tall, muscular frame hits the floor. Now, he'll get what's coming to him.  
I walk over, reading to kick him in the ribs. He can have a bruise on his ribs to match mine. I look down at his face.

Shit.

That's not Rowle.

There's only one person who I want to see less than Rowle.  
And he's frozen at my feet.

We meet again, Ted Tonks.

* * *

**Track: Fallout - Mariannas Trench**

Ted's eyes are the most painful sight I've ever seen.  
I've never seen someone that scared.  
And I'm a Slytherin.  
_And_ a Black!  
I can see my reflection in his frozen eyeballs. I look scared as hell too.  
Which I am.

I drop down beside him, casting a quick counter-curse. My nerves are too frazzled to do it non-verbally. Tonks body relaxes. He lay there on his back, unmoving. Just breathing. I lay down beside him on the floor, mentally exhausted. And for a while, we just listen to our breathing. In and out. In and out. Deep breaths. In and out. Calm.  
Finally, I sit up and look at him. His eyes are still wider than usual ad he's still tense, but so am I. He suddenly snaps back to reality upon seeing my face again. He jumps a good two feet, still sitting. The fear is back in his eyes again. But there's something else. Pain? Hurt? Like he's seeing the real me for the first time. A house elf who's been kicked, a kid who's father just told them they were canceling plans with them, again. Like A boy who believed that this girl wasn't who everyone judged her as, only to find out she was. It hurts me just looking at those pain-stricken eyes. I realize we've been locking eyes for a long time, and shiver involuntarily. Woah. That's not normal. I make others shiver, not the other way around.

"I-I-I.." I stammer. I can't even put together a coherent sentence.  
"A-I-I-You," By the sounds of it, neither can he.

"I didn't mean to!" Was all I could manage.  
He says nothing, just keeps staring. His wand is out. Why does that make my heart sink a little?  
"I-I thought you were, um..." I can't finish my sentence, it hurts too much. I don't need to. Realization dawns on his perfect features. He knows what I mean. I thought he was Rowle. I thought he was Rowle coming to rape me.  
I just wanna bawl.

But I don't.

Of course I don't. I'm a Black. A master of self-control. It's a skill rivaled only by Severus Snape. I stiffen up and straighten my face. Inreadable.  
He doesn't buy it. Tonk's face can be read like a book. Pain, but only because he feels someone else's pain. And caring. He cares. No one cares about anyone but themselves in my world. So why is he giving me that look?  
He sees right through my poker face, so, still sitting, I turn my back on him.  
I'm staring at the ancient stone wall, keeping control. Crying is never an option.

Suddenly, I feel warmth beside me. I look to my right.  
He's sitting beside me. And-  
What in Merlin-

He's hugging me.

A boy is sitting on the floor with me, _hugging me_.

He's not afraid of me, he's not trying to impress me. He's not trying to seduce me, he's not trying to sweet-talk me.  
He's just, **_hugging me._**

I've never felt anything like it.

And I cave.

For once, I forget my poker face. I forget that I'm a Slytherin and he's a Hufflepuff. I forget that I'm a Black and he's a mudblood. I forget that our entire world is against this. I forget Bellatrix. I forget that I never cry in front of anyone. I forget that I'll never feel this loved ever again, for as long as I live, because I'll never have anyone like Tonks in my cold world. For once, I forget, and just be.

* * *

**Hoorah! Another chapter! Sorry guys, I really enjoyed the chapter-a-day thing, but I just haven't had time. I've been overstressed lately, and it's affecting my health. But a few days ago I realized that writing is a form of stress-management for me, so I'm going to try and write more again.**  
**In other news, Pottermore finally works for me and I was sorted into...**  
**HUFFLEPUFF!**

**I'm rather pleased. I was a cross between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff, but in the end I guess I'm a Hufflepuff. Then again, what the hell is a Hufflepuff?**  
**Haha! Old habits die hard. However, Moral of the story: When I use Hufflepuff jokes, I mean it all in good fun, seeing that I myself am a Hufflepuff :)**  
**-xoxo IWishIWasAWeasley**


	19. Chapter 19

**Track: Te Amo - Rihanna**

I've never felt loved.

Not really.

Bella and Cissy are the only one's who love me, but even that's messed up.

Bella's going slightly mad, and Cissy won't be herself around _anyone_.  
Not even me.

But Ted Tonks, he was himself. He didn't care about my last name. I'll never have anyone like that in my life. Never again.

* * *

I wake up feeling warm and secure.

Why do I feel warm and secure?  
The Slytherin dungeons are the coldest part of the castle, and you never feel totally safe here.  
So why do I feel safe and warm.

Oh shit.  
I open my eyes.

I'm on the floor;

wrapped in the arms of Ted Tonks.

You know, that mudblood who I shouldn't be talking to? The one who saw me cry! Shit!  
His arms are firmly circling me, so I can't just slither out. (Hah! Slither, Slytherin. Get it! HAH!)  
GET IT TOGETHER ANDROMEDA!

"Tonks! Ted! Ted Tonks!" I say, hitting his muscled chest lightly with my delicate fist.

His eyes fly open. He sees me and subsequently jumps a good two feet-again.

"Merlin, Andromeda! Shit, you scared me!" He says, laying back down, still groggy.  
"Tonks, what time is it?" I inquire steadily, voicing my fears.  
His eyes widen. Clearly he hadn't thought of that. He reaches into his robes and pulls out a silver pocket-watch. It's a nice one too. Someone did well on their seventeenth birthday. He looks up at me.

"Eleven." He said  
"P.M OR A.M!" I asked, panic growing.  
"A.M..." He answered slowly.  
"Oh, bloody hell! We're late!" I shouted, frantically scrambling up from the floor. Tonks was quickly on his feet as well, and he gripped my arm, firmly, but not roughly.  
"What's the big rush?" He asked  
_"What's the rush! We're late for class you idiot!"_ I shouted before trying to bolt again.  
"Andromeda!" He said, exasperated.  
"What!" I'm growing hysterical. Why won't he let go!  
"It's Saturday!" He says, looking me straight in the eye. I stop dead. Have I been so distracted and stressed out that I didn't even realize it was the weekend? I can't stand the thought. Rowle shouldn't affect me this much. Things aren't supposed to affect me this much. I'm not going to cry again though. That's one mistake that I'm never making again.  
"It's Hogsmead today, so you can go back to your common room without much trouble." he continued, sensing my distress. He didn't try to hug me this time.  
Hogsmead! That's right! I wasn't going anyway. Rowle would jump me for sure. I told the girls I had other things to do. I'm always up first, they wont think anything of my empty bed. I'm safe. I let out a sigh.  
"We should go eat." Tonks said lightly, changing the subject. I silently thank him.  
"It's eleven o'clock, Tonks. Breakfast is over and lunch isn't till noon." I say impatiently.  
"We don't need to wait. Come on." He says, opening the door. What is this lunatic up to now? I can't be seen with him, he should know that. I have no desire to be seen with a mudblood Hufflepuff. Being hung by my toenails by my housemates and Bellatrix doesn't add much to the appeal either. i figured Tonks would've figured that out. Hufflepuffs must be as stupid as everyone says.  
"Are you coming or not?" He asked, gripping the door frame.  
"Tonks- you know we can't just waltz into the Great Hall together." I said. I thought I'd finally met a half-smart Hufflepuff, but he's just as dense as the rest of them!  
"We're not going to the Great Hall! Do I look suicidal to you! He replied in disbelief. Okay... where else does one eat in this school? Crap. Now I'm curious. Curiosity, my old weakness, has come back to haunt me. Just dandy.  
"Aren't you hungry, Black?" He asks. I'm starving. I haven't eaten in forever. When I'm hungry, I'm selfish. I don't care about my sisters and housemates, I just care about my empty stomach.  
"You better have food for me, Tonks." I grumble, and follow him out the door.

* * *

**Track: Save Me - Nicki Minaj**

We walk down corridor after corridor. We're on the ground floor of the castle now, maybe lower. We come to a corridor with a bunch or barrels in it. I've never been this far on this side of the castle. In other words: I'm lost. Tonks knows exactly where he's going though, and I'm hungry. So I follow. He stops in the barrel-filled corridor, in front of a painting. An insignificant little painting of a fruit bowl. What are we doing now! I'm really impatient at this point. I want food and to get far away from this blasted mudblood who keeps popping up in my life! Then, he reaches up and tickles the pear in the painting.  
Yes, he is tickling a painting of a pear.  
He's officially loonier than Xenophillius Lovegood.  
And then the pear jumps.  
MERLIN, COME SAVE ME!  
The pear in the painting just jumped. And giggled.  
Tonks looks over his shoulder at me. He laughs at my 's enjoying this; The sod. My poker face is no good in this situation. The pear then jumps out of the painting and _a door!_ creaks open.

Behind it, we enter a low-ceilinged room to find the most house elves I've ever seen- and they're staring at me with awe and admiration. They call out to Ted; he must be a frequent visitor.  
The elves absolutely love Tonks. They're all pushing to get closer, wanting to shake his hand, to wave hello. Tonks does his best to greet them all, friendly as ever. It's the most peculiar thing I've ever seen. The elves start ushering Tonks to a table, I feel invisible. Tonks however, hasn't forgotten me. He pulls me by the hand through the throng of elves around our feet. As soon as we get to the small table, I let go of his hand, as he lets go of mine. My hand feels funny now.  
And I know that it isn't because I've contracted some muggle disease from a filthy mudblood.


	20. Chapter 20

**Track: Fly - Nicki Minaj ft. Rihanna**

We're sitting at the little table in the corner of the Hogwarts kitchens. The house elves are scurrying around, preparing lunch for the throng of students. Despite all the food they have to make, they're constantly stopping by, asking us if we need anything else to eat. It's getting annoying. Tonks, however, talks to each elf like they're an old mate of his. He keeps thanking them. It confuses me to no end. Finally, I can't keep it in anymore.

"Why are you so nice to them?" I ask. I've never seen anyone talk to a house elf the way Tonks does. What's the point of it?  
"What?" He replies.  
"House elves. Why are you so nice to them?" I ask again.  
"What kind of question is that?" He asks. He looks genuinely concerned.  
"They're just house elves. They're servants. You have no reason to be nice to them." I explain. Muggles must not have house elves. Why else would he be nice to those things?  
"Do you honestly think that?" He looks bewildered, like he's waiting to either be disgusted or sigh in relief.  
"Doesn't everyone? I'm genuinely confused. If people have started liking their servants, that's news to me.  
"No. Most decent people know how to treat others with respect." He says defiantly. Hold up! _Did a MUDBLOOD just call me indecent?  
_"Excuse you, but they're servants, not your mother. And who are you to call me indecent!" I snap.  
"Oh, so you really are just like them then? Muggleborns are disgusting and house elves are just there for you to kick around!" He snarls back.  
"Oh, so you're going to go there then? We were talking about house elves, not blood purity!" I yell.  
"Don't act like it's not on your mind! It's the first thing that pops into your head when you see me! Hell, it probably never leaves your mind! I'm not an idiot, you know! Being in Slytherin means nothing!" He stands up.  
"You just wish you were in Slytherin!" Now I'm standing too.  
"I have ignored that look on your face_ every single time you look at me_! That look on your face, I should slap you for it! Yet I ignore it! I'm sick of pretending you're not just another judgmental Slytherin snob! _You're just like them!_" He hollers.  
"I'm the judgmental one!" I scream. But I stop. Because hell, does that sting. This ignorant bastard thinks he has it all figured out. "I'm the judgmental bitch!" Quite crying Andromeda! "_I'M_ judgmental, yet everyone else in the entire Merlin-damned wizarding world are the ones judging ME! And you're no better than them! Everyone thinks I'm a cruel, blood-obsessed, selfish, judgmental bitch who hates everyone and everything that's not green and silver and hates muggles. Well you know what? _Fine!_ Just believe it then! Judge me! I don't care about any of them, and I certainly don't care about you!_ I don't need you_! Because I gave up on people a long time ago! So I'll say what you expect me to say: have a miserable, inferior life, you pathetic, filthy, disgusting MUDBLOOD!" I turn on my heel and leave.  
"I-" He starts. I'm not hearing it.  
"Shut up! SHUT, UP! You're less than the dirt on my shoes! You're nothing more than a dirty, filthy inferior mudblood born to monsters! And that's all you ever will be! You're an abomination! A crime against nature! You don't belong here! You don't deserve to live! _Is this what you wanted to hear then?_ You wanted to hear me say what my parents say! You don't know shit! I'm not them! _But since there's no one who cares to find that out, I guess I'll just give up and become them!_" Once I start, I just can't stop. I've never been this angry at anyone before. The house elves are all crammed behind Tonks, as though I'll Avada them all. This just fuels my fury. Tonks looks like he's been clubbed with a beaters bat. I turn to leave and this time, I don't look back.

* * *

I've never been more grateful for a Hogsmead day. I'd pull a Bellatrix on any poor soul who came near me at this point.  
_I can't believe him!_ I've never been this _angry!_

Am I angry?

Yes.

Am I angry at him?

I wish.

I thought he was different.  
For once in my life, I'd met someone different! Someone who tried to get to know me. Someone who didn't want to judge me. But he did anyway. In the end he was just judging me anyway. And it makes me wanna cry.

Which makes me furious.

With myself.

* * *

**Yuck! This chapter is shortest I've ever written! Adding anything would've just been filler though.**

**Now we get serious.**

**If you add this story to your favs or updates, that's great! I love it! _But this story has twice as many favs as it does reviews. This story is over 30 000 words guys! Could you maybe leave me a little something?_ I won't beg, it bugs me when authors do. But really, I'd like to hear why you like this story.**

**-xoxo IWishIWasAWeasley**


	21. Chapter 21

**Track: Save Me - Nicki Minaj**

* * *

Weeks later:

Life is back to normal.

That's what I tell myself.

Life has reverted back to the way it was before a certain good-looking mudblood crashed into it and messed everything up.

But now he's gone, and things are exactly as they were.

That's a lie.

Because things can never be as they were.

Ted Tonks changed me. He changed they way I see the world, and the way I react to it. He brought out my curious, questioning nature that had long been buried under a mountain of obedience. Now, it's trying to break through again. I don't know what to believe anymore. I don't know what to feel.

Before, I believed what I was told by my family and my house. If a pure-blood says it, it's law. Now, I don't know.  
Before, I was okay with being alone in my troubles. Now, I've tasted how it feels to have someone who cares about you. Someone who cares about you more than their social standing. Before, I never knew what it was like, so I never knew what I was missing.  
But now I do.  
And it kills me.

When there are no muggleborns around, I don't like them. I nod in agreement when Rabastan says the lot of them should go die.  
But when I see a muggleborn, I don't hate them. I worry whether they hate me. I wonder what they're like, if their family has been destroyed by one of my kind. I don't understand why I care so much, and I hate that I do.

I've never questioned the pure-blood views before, and now I am.

And now, I don't know whether I'm becoming a better person or a worse one. Are muggles evil? Or are we the bad ones?

* * *

I haven't looked at Ted Tonks in weeks. And that suits me just fine. I'd probably punch him if I did.  
I'm still a liar.

I would punch him,  
but it doesn't suit me just fine.

He seems equally set on avoiding me too, so we're very successful in this endeavor.

Life is pretty much a blur of pointless days mended together right now.

Until Dolohov tracks me down.

* * *

I'm out on the quidditch pitch, practicing. I'm really just flying around as fast as I can. Since Tonks and Rowle, I've needed to find some way to relieve stress. So, flying as fast as I can is all I've come up with. It helps, but I still want something more.

I'm flying around, throwing in the odd wronksi feint, when suddenly, my broom lurches.  
My trusty broom has never failed me before, it always works. So why is my broom zooming to the left of the field when I'm trying to go right?  
I'm screaming across the pitch, towards the ground, when I hear someone holler: "_Immobulus!_"  
Suddenly, the world is in slow motion. No, that's not right. Because my broom fell to the ground at a perfectly normal speed. It's me-still airborne-that's falling in slow motion. I'm starting to panic when I see Thorfinn Rowle and Antonin Dolohov, wands out, staring at my immobilized state.  
_Shit!_  
Freezing charm still in affect, I slowly drift to the hard earth. Thorfinn and Dolohov are upon me in seconds.

**Track: Fly Nicki Minaj ft. Rihanna**

"Pleasant day, Andromeda." Antonin says with a sick grin.  
"She's frozen, you idiot! She can't answer us under the effects of a freezing charm!" Thorfinn says, slapping his forehead with his palm.  
"Well, how are we going to keep her around while you talk to her then!" Dolohov snaps back.  
"_I'll_ pin her down! You just shut up!" Rowle replies, exasperated.  
Rowle has me pinned before I feel the effects of the freezing spell lifting from my body. Satisfied, Rowle looks down from on top of me.  
"So, ready to give in to the inevitable?" He says seductively. He's on top of me the same way he was that night he tried to... yeah. And I don't like it, at all. I kick and scream and struggle with all my might. Dolohov is frozen is disbelief. Between breaths, I manage:  
_"I will...never...like..you! I...hate you! You..sicken..me!"_ Rowle doesn't like this at all. He clamps down harder on my arms and legs. Pain. I'm so angry, I'm practically spitting fire. And I do spit. I spit in Thorfinn's face.  
Livid, he pushes down harder and lowers his face right behind my left ear. Then he bites down, hard.  
The pain is almost unbearable. I kick harder and scream. I'm flailing all my limbs, trying to reduce the pain in my head. Satisfied, Rowle stops biting me.  
"You never learn, bitch. One day you will." He points his wand at my face, between my eyes. I'm frozen in fear. A flash of light. Then, blackness.

* * *

Where am I?

My neck hurts like hell!

I look around. I'm in some sort of broom cupboard. Why am I in a broom cupboard?

Oh my God.

Am I naked!

Nope. Every garment of my quidditch robes is intact and as I left them.

Take a deep breath, Andromeda.

I realize now what he could've done.

And I cry.

* * *

I've cleaned myself up and conjured some clothes. I'm wearing my black jeans, emerald silk top, and my adorable black leather jacket. On any other day, I'd be pleased with how cute my outfit is. Today, however, I can't quite manage it.  
My eyes still red and puffy, I open the door to my broom cupboard and peek through.  
I'm in the quidditch stadium change rooms.  
No one's around, so I exit the cupboard I've been in for who-knows-how-long. I then strut out like I own the place. If I act intimidating enough, no one will question me. I'll be just fine.

My brilliant plans never work anymore.

Because the first person I see is one of very few people who'd see through the bitch act.

Hello Tonks! Long time no see!

_Shit._

* * *

**All in all, I'm rather pleased with this chapter. Thanks to my lovely reviewers! There's still twice as many favs as reviews though. Come on guys! Step it up! You can do it! I believe in you! ;)**

**-xoxo IWishIWasAWeasley**


	22. Chapter 22

**Track: Save the World - Swedish House Mafia**

* * *

Ted Tonks is staring at me, concern evident on his face mixed with mild shock at bumping into me like this.

I'm suddenly very aware of my puffy red eyes.

I'm supposed to keep walking, strutting around like nothing's wrong, leaving Tonks to wonder if my eyes were really that red when he saw them. But I'm frozen in place. It's been so long since I've seen him. I can't tear myself away. And that's only half of it.

I want him to see. I want him to notice my puffy red eyes. I want him to see through my façade and realize that something is wrong. I want him to break down my walls again, to hold me while I cry. I want it so so bad.

I need him.

_No I don't!_

To prove it, I do walk away, leaving Tonks gaping.  
I'm disgusted with myself.  
I shouldn't have to prove my independence to myself.

But I do.

Screw you, Ted Tonks.  
I'm independent. I don't need anyone.

Especially not a boy.

Especially not a mudblood.

Especially not him.

* * *

I'm entering the common room later that night. I've calmed down since my surprise reunion with that pain-in-the-arse-mudblood who happens to have stellar timing. Seeing him causes something to shirt inside me. But I'll be okay. I'll just have to deal for now. It'll get better with time. Although it may test my patience.

I'm feeling surprisingly good despite my muggleborn issues, so when Rabastan Lestrange waves me over to the chair he's sitting in across the common room, I'm actually _smiling_.

"You're actually _smiling!_" He exclaims. Have I mentioned I love this kid?  
"I haven't seen you smile in so long! It's a good look for you. The Bellatrix snarl doesn't match your hair." He says. I can't help but laugh. Best guy friend? Maybe.  
"What's up Rabastan?" I ask. He waved me over for something.  
"Have a sit." He gestures to the matching ornate chair beside him. I take a seat, getting worried.  
"We need a favor." He whispers.  
"What is it?" I whisper back.  
"Something's going down tonight, and we need you to cover me at the prefect meeting." He whispers.  
"Explain?"  
"I'm missing the meeting. Do you think you can use your 'I'll call Bellatrix on you if you question me' tactic?" Rabastan whispers quickly.  
"Yea, I'm sure I can cover for you. The teachers love you anyway." I reply quietly.  
"Brilliant. You're the best, Andromeda!" Rabastan sighs in relief.  
"Yea, yea. Now what's going down tonight." I ask, lightheartedness gone.  
"I know we're sposed to have you in on it at all times, but this operation is going to get messy. You don't need to be drug in as the ringleader of the whole thing, Andromeda. You've got enough on your mind." He says. "Yes, I do notice at times. I don't know if it was the wedding or something else, but you don't need extra drama. And if I know you, you hate drama anyway."

Best guy friend?

Definitely.

"I would probably tell you anyway, but there's too high of a risk if someone else overhears. There's no time. I'll fill you in on everything after, I promise. But for right now, can you cut me a break?" He pleads, half smiling.  
"I'm trusting you too keep yourself out of detention. I'll give a break this time, but next time you're planning something, Narcissa and I are in on it or else." I reply, eyebrow raised.  
"Yes mam'." He says, and salutes me. The sod. I crack a grin.

I'm not even pestering Rabastan about tonight's shin-dig. Am I so worn out that I've stopped being curious?

* * *

This morning has been one massive headache.

It started when we woke up. Patricia wasn't in her bed. So we rushed upstairs to see if the guys had arrived.

They hadn't.

We found Thorfinn and Antonin, running around like chickens with their heads cut off, looking for Theo Urqheart and Rabastan.

This is bad.

The only one we found was Patricia.  
She was sitting alone in a chair in front of the fireplace with a blanket wrapped around her. Her cheeks were red and there were dark grey bags under her blue eyes.

"He-he wanted me to come." She whispered when I came to sit with her. "Rabastan wanted me to come, but I wouldn't go."  
Patricia and I don't enjoy going along on excursions with the boys. Lara always does, and Miranda Gies in sixth year will come if they need an extra wand, but that's about it. The boys do the dirty work in Slytherin House.

"We had a row about it too. He wanted me to come so we could spend more time together. I sad if he wanted to spend time with me, he should just stay behind. That wasn't the right thing to say." She mumbled.

Our boys pass off their mischief making as "honorable." If you're a boy, you want to be invited on one of these night excursions, as soon as possible. Rabastan is the ringleader, he wouldn't even consider missing an adventure. Especially one of this magnitude that he wouldn't tell me.  
I'm surprised I'm not more freaked out about that. I'm just not.

I _am_ freaking out about the boys being gone though. Rabastan said this thing would get messy. This is not good.

* * *

**A little excitement for you? Maybe :)**  
**I've honestly been waiting so long to get to this point. I'm excitedd.**  
**Thank you, my lovely reviewers! There are now six of you! Each one was so unfailingly kind and supportive!**  
**Maybe I can get a few more than six? Maybe?**

**-xoxo**


	23. Chapter 23

Track:

* * *

By breakfast we're all worried. Theo and Rabastan are gone! They've just, vanished! If they get detention, they can still go back to their house and sleep! But they're just not there! They're not anywhere! We went to breakfast hoping to find them there, but they weren't.

Patricia is particularly distressed. She waited up all night for Rabastan, upset about their row. She said that the common room door never moved once last night. That _really_ worries me. They never came back.

Breakfast is just awful. It's now fairly obvious to the other houses that something is up. Our table is very quiet. Dumbledore and Slughorn are missing from the head table. Strangely enough, so is Professor Sprout. She always comes down for breakfast.

I look across the Great Hall-the Hufflepuff table is clean on the opposite side of the hall as the Slytherin table. I have to look over the Ravenclaws beside me, and the Gryffindor's beside them, to see any bits of yellow.  
The older students did look worried. But, they were all there? Did something happen to Professor Sprout?

"Sprout is missing and the Hufflepuff's look mighty worried. You don't think our boys..." I trailed off while whispering to Narcissa.  
"Rabastan planned this one, right? Do you think he would attack a teacher? A Hufflepuff teacher! They don't cause much trouble, it's Gryffindor's we hate, remember?" She whispered back.  
"Good point." I replied. I haven't had any spare brain-power to hate the Gryffindors. Mine's been used up trying to hate a certain blond Hufflepuff.

Wait.

I look again across the hall.

Where's Tonks?

Oh Merlin, no.

* * *

Breakfast is about to end.

Still no boys.

Still no Tonks.

I have a sick, sick feeling.

Everyone begins to leave for their classes, but McGonagall has risen and is standing at the head-masters podium. Oh dear.

"Quite down now! Now, as you can tell, there are many absences this morning." McGonagall started sharply. "Late last night, a seventh year student performed a powerful banishing spell on a first year student. The spell caused the victim to hit their head on the wall and they are currently unconscious in the hospital wing." She finished.

A FIRST YEAR!

_WHAT THE HELL RABASTAN!_

I exchange looks with Narcissa and Patricia. They're as panicked as I am.  
_A FIRST YEAR!  
_This is bad.  
There was then a chorus of "who was it!" and "We deserve to know!" from various students. I too, need to know. I'm afraid of the answer, though.  
McGonagall was clearly hoping to avoid divulging that information. Finally, she says slowly:

"It has been confirmed that the seventh year Hufflepuff Ted Tonks attacked the first year Slytherin Severus Snape."

Oh. My God.

* * *

My head is swimming. I never noticed Snape's absence. He's only a first year! First years don't get to go with the older boys!

After the Gryffindors and Ravenclaws left, buzzing with excitement, a little redheaded Gryffindor girl ran up to McGonagall, hystericall and crying buckets.  
"Now Miss Evans-" McGongall began.  
"HE'S MY BEST FRIEND! AND T-TED, TED'S NICE! HE WOULDN'T DO THAT! WHERE'S SEV! I NEED TO SEE HIM! HE'S MY BEST FRIEND! I NEED SEV!" She cried. Now I remember. Lily Evans, the mudblood girl. Severus' best friend. McGonagall puts a protective arm around the shattered first year and sits her down at the Gryffindor table.

I look across the hall: Many of the older Hufflepuffs are still here.

Desdemona Biggs, an annoying seventh year Hufflepuff girl, is crying hysterically into another girls shoulder. She's so annoying! Honestly, calm down! I don't care if he's you brother or your worst enemy! No need to make a scene! Always trying to be the center of attention, that one.  
"Professor!" She cries, straightening up. "I need to see him! You have to let me see him!" She begs.  
"Tonks will be seeing no one for quite some time, Miss Biggs. Now, I understand you'd all like to see him, but Tonks is occupied until further notice. I must insist you all go to your classes. Professor Sprout will speak with you tonight. And Biggs, take a toilet break first. Go with her, Harput. Off you go!" And the Hufflepuffs left the hall, Desdemona still crying dramatically, and our table shooting daggers at them with our eyes.

"Now," McGonagall began seriously. "This situation may seem very balck and white to all of you. However I assure you, it is not. Does anyone wish to inform me why Severus Snape was out at such an hour? No? Very well then. Off to your classes. Professor Slughorn will speak with you tonight." We all got up to leave. "Except you, Miss Black." McGonagall says sharply. Cissy and I turn around in unison. "Andromeda, not Narcissa. Come with me." I shoot looks at my housemates, hoping they'll stay calm. I don't know where I'm going or why, but I know it's about Rabastan and Ted. I need as much info as I can get. McGonagall has a protective arm guiding a weeping Lily Evans.

* * *

We make our way up to Dumbledores office in the usual manner. McGonagall, however, doesn't follow me in the door.  
"Miss Evans and I are going to pay a visit to the hospital wing. The Headmaster is waiting for you inside." She says before turning to leave. I push open the ornate door to the Headmaster's office and nearly choke when I see the people gathered inside it.

Dumbledore  
Theo  
Rabastan  
and Ted!

What Fun!


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer because I haven't done one in like, 20 chapters: Harry Potter belongs to J.K Rowling. I'm not J.K Rowling. Disclaimers are a waste of time.  
**

* * *

**Track: Rumor Has It - Adele**

* * *

"Pleasant morning to you, Miss Black. The again, I suppose it's been less then pleasant." Albus Dumbledore addressed me from behind his beautiful desk. He's not sunshine and rainbows like usual. He's troubled. And what's troubling him?

The answer is sitting in front of me, in the form of

Rabastan Lestrange, one of my best friends  
Theo Urqheart, my longtime classmate  
And Tonks. Stupid Ted Tonks, the mudblood Hufflepuff who I should hate but I don't.

Little Severus Snape is currently lying unmoving in the hospital wing with Lily Evans crying his name.

What a happy day.

"Less than pleasant? That scum put Severus in the hospital wing!" Rabastan shouted, glaring viciously at Tonks on the opposite side of the room.  
"_I did not!_" Tonks retorted.  
"You attacked a first year!" Theo jumped in.  
"I meant to hit you, idiot!"  
"So why'd you aim for the eleven-year-old?"  
"You know he was under a delusionment charm!"

_Wait, what?_

"Cut the rubbish Tonks! We've been through this! You could see every inch of Severus when you hexed him! We all know the truth, so you can stuff it with your lies!" Rabastan yelled.  
"Gentlemen, please! I've heard both accounts of the story, there's no reason to ruffle our feathers again! As you can see, we have a lady amongst us. Do try to contain yourselves and spare her eardrums." Dumbledore cut in sarcastically, but not unkindly. All eyes turned to me; I drew up to my full height.  
"What is it you need of me, Professor Dumbledore?" I asked politely. When someone's as smart as Dumbledore, it's a lot easier to simply get along with them. Bella could've spared herself a lot of grief had she known. Bellatrix hates Dumbledore.  
"I am merely in need of a responsible student to escort my young Slytherin friends here to the hospital wing, then back to their dormitory while Professor Slughorn is occupied with young Severus. I trust you can handle these two, Miss Black?" Dumbledore says cheerfully. How cheerful can you be at a time like this?  
"Yes sir, I can handle these two just fine." I reply, smirking at my two housemates who are quickly growing tired of having shots taken at them by the elderly Headmaster and a girl. I ignore their distress and exit the room through the double doors of the Headmaster's office, Rabastan and Theo grumbling behind me.

* * *

"Alright, what's going on?" I ask as soon as we're alone in the corridors, walking towards the hospital wing. I hope the Evans girl is gone before we get there.  
"I'll spill everything, after we make sure little Severus is holding up." Rabastan assures me.  
"Fine."

* * *

Severus' bed is the only occupied one in the hospital wing. Even if it wasn't, it's impossible to miss the vibrant red hair of the little girl holding his hand.  
Still in her Gryffindor robes, Lily Evans hasn't left her best friend's side. She sees us three Slytherins, and her face darkens. Rabastan and Theo glare at the young mudblood.  
"Don't give me that look! I haven't seen any of his other 'friends' visit him the entire time I've been here! So nice of you to finally show up!" She snaps, her hair nearly giving off sparks.  
Rabastan starts. "Listen up, you disrespectful little mud-"  
"Let it go, Rabastan. Pomfrey will have your head for cussing out a first year." I cut in. I'm not sure how much trouble the boys are in, but I'm fairly sure they're on thin ice. Calling a little girl a mudblood would not go over well.  
"Save your breath for Tonks, mate." Theo added. Finally, he contributes something intelligent!  
"Tonks is nice! He'd never curse Sev!" Evans retorted. Come on girl! I got them off your back! Way to bring it on yourself?  
"Since there's nothing more that we can do for Severus, I say we go find some bearable humans. Come boys." I say. That redheaded runt should be thanking me. Whatever.

* * *

"Alright, spill!" I say impatiently the moment we're safely alone in our deserted common room. I suppose we should be going to class. Screw that.  
"Alright! I'll spill! Just wait till after to lecture me or praise my brilliance, I can never tell with you." Rabastan replies. I grab a cushion from the couch and beat him over the head with it. Finally, Rabastan tells me the entire story. I process his words in my head.

He didn't do it.

Ted Tonks didn't do it.

* * *

**Track: Payphone - Maroon 5**

A part of me wouldn't believe that Ted did it. I mean, come on! He's a Hufflepuff! Mr. Niceguy house!  
But it's more than that.

Because when Tonks isn't around, I feel like he's just another mudblood after all, and I'm almost happy.

Then I see him, and I can't even dislike-nevermind hate him-no matter how hard I try. And I_ am_ happy.  
Until he leaves.

Then I'm back to square one.

Because Ted Tonks isn't just another muggleborn. And I'm not just another pureblood.  
I've known that for awhile, but I used to hide from it. I can't hide anymore. I'm not like them. My parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles housemates and cousins; my own sisters. I'm not like them. I guess I never was. But Tonks brought it out of me. Most of the time I wish he hadn't; it's a crate of blast-ended skrewts that didn't need opening. But in the back of my head, I know it's the truth. I'm different. And Tonks is innocent.

* * *

**Someone else just published a story about Andromeda called "Blood." I'm a little sad.**

* * *

**I'M BACK! OMYGOODNESS, YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG IT TOOK TO WRITE THIS! BUT I'M OVER MY WRITERS BLOCK (HOPEFULLY) AND READY TO GO! 33  
**

**-xoxo  
**


	25. Chapter 25

**Track: Rumour Has It - Adele** (again)

I don't know what to do.  
Ted Tonks is innocent.  
I know the truth.  
But the truth would be the end of my best friend. What would they do to Rabastan? What would they do to me?  
What are they doing to Ted?

* * *

The scene that greets me the following morning is not a pleasant one.

Tonks isn't aloud to eat in the Great Hall with the rest of the school, but he's aloud a few visitors. I was on my way to Ravenclaw Tower to see if Paisley was around, but what I saw stopped me.  
Tonks was having a heated argument with Desdemona Biggs.  
You know, the super annoying Hufflepuff who wears stupid clothes and cheap accessories who never shuts up? Yeah, her. She describes herself as "quirky," "crazy," or "unique." But really she's just downright annoying. And she loves cheap muggle chlothes. You're in the Wizarding World! At least try to be a wizard! (I guess I should say witch. Oh well.)  
But anyway, I cast my handy dilusionment charm and listen.

"Ted! McGonagall herself told us!" Biggs shouted.  
"And now I'm telling you: it's not true!" He says back.  
"How am I supposed to believe that, Ted!"  
"Everyone told me that you made out with that Gryffindor during my Quidditch game, but I believed you, not them!"  
"This is different!"  
"How?"  
"You hexed a first year!"  
"For the last time, I did not!"  
"But-"  
"I always believed in you, Desdemona! You said you'd always believe in me, too! What happened to that!"  
"I don't know what to think anymore!" Oh great, she's crying. And not even trying to control it. What a drama queen.  
"Well, here's what I think, Desdemona! I think you don't trust me! Because you know I should never have trusted you! That's it, isn't it! You cheated with that Gryffindor during my Quidditch game!"  
"This isn't about me Ted!"  
"Uh, yes it is!"  
"Ted-"  
"I'm done with your bullshit Desdemona! You convinced me that it'd work if we tried again, but it wont. It'll never work. I broke up with you once, I should've stuck to that. I hope you and your Gryffindor are happy together!"  
"But Ted I love you!"  
"_Yet you don't believe me that I didn't hex a first year!_ I thought you of all people would believe in me! You don't know me at all if you'd even consider that I'd do that! Those Slytherin guys are _evil_ Desdemona! They only care about themselves. Kinda like you, I guess."  
"Ted! I love-"  
"Quite fooling yourself; you don't even know what love is Desdemona. I'm sorry. We were best friends as kids. But playtime's over. You've changed. I guess I have too. But I'm not letting you use me anymore."

And then, Ted Tonks walked away.

* * *

My question's been answered, then. I know what's being done to Ted. He's innocent, but no one believes it. No one believes the truth.  
Except me.

I have to think about this.

But there's nothing to really think about.  
It all comes down to two questions:

Rabastan or Ted?

Wrong or Right?

Pureblood or Freedom?

It's time to become me.  
Here's to the truth: it sets you free.

* * *

I'm speeding towards the Headmaster's office before I can stop to further ponder an obvious truth: Ted doesn't deserve this.

I reach the gargoyle guards, only to find them standing to the side, the staircase is perfectly accessible. I don't stop to ask questions, however, and dash up the spiral staircase. I reach the door to Dumbledore's office and push it open. No one there. I look down. A piece of parchement is clutched in my hands so tightly that it's getting crumpled. On this piece of parchement is the entire story; the truth.  
Ted's freedom.

I place it one Dumbledore's desk and scurry from the room. No one can know.

* * *

What have I done?

I've betrayed my best friend.

It would've been easier had I just expelled him myself.

I mean, Rabastan is the brother I never had! The son my mother always craved! His future is set to failure, and it's all my fault.

Why didn't I think it through more?

Because.

Because when you know what's right and you're determined to do what's right, nothing else matters. You're aware of the cost, but you know it's worth it anyway.

I've never felt anything like it.

I've never known right from wrong.

Now I know. Right used to be what's best for my family's priorities. And I know now that even those are messed up. Before, if it benefited my families wealth, status or safety, it was the right thing to do.

Like Bellatrix's marriage to Rodolfus.

It was wrong.

We just didn't know it yet.

Now I know. And I can never go back. The damage is done. The truth has set me free.


	26. Chapter 26

**Track: Wide Awake - Katy Perry  
**

Everyone was abuzz this morning.

"Where are Theo and Rabastan?"

I knew, of course. The news will be out soon. And I was right.

* * *

We're at breakfast, our table is still buzzing with whispers. I say nothing. I'm waiting to hear the fate of my best friend.

When Dumbledore stands up, the entire hall falls deathly silent.

"Good morning students! I have an important announcement!" The elder began. "As you know, an announcement was made that the seventh year Hufflepuff Ted Tonks had hexed the first year Slytherin, Severus Snape. It so happens, that we were fooled. Ted Tonks, was framed."  
Deathly cheers erupted from the Hufflepuff table. They were soon joined by the Gryffindors and most of the Ravenclaws. The entire hall was screaming in triumph for Ted Tonks. All except the Slytherins. Most of us just don't like Tonks. Some students however, have already figured out the puzzle. The reason why Theo and Rabastan are missing.  
Suddenly, Dumbledore looked troubled. Solemnly, he continued. "We have proven that two sixth and seventh year Slytherin's, Theo Urqheart and Rabastan Lestrange, are responsible. They are henceforth, expelled."

Expelled. The word rang through the ears of the occupants of Hogwarts. Expelled. My best friend has been expelled from Hogwarts.

I look to my left; Patricia is crying silently. I can't take it.  
I'm the master of self-control. The only people better at it are my sisters and Snape. But Rabastan's future being Avada Kedavra'd combined with it being all my fault is unbearable. I hold my friend and cry right along with her.

* * *

Dumbledore didn't say what happened, but I know the truth.  
The truth that set Tonks free.

So I told my housemates what happened. Lara and I held Patricia's hands through the entire story.

No one really questioned me when I announced to the Head Girl that Rabastan would not be present. Meanwhile, Rabastan, Theo and Severus made their way to a deserted corridor. Deserted, except for one Ted Tonks; patrolling alone while the rest of us had a meeting. Our boys attacked the solitary Hufflepuff from behind. However, Ted Tonks isn't as easily defeated as their previous targets. Despite their flurry of dark spells, he fought back. He aimed a hex directly at Theo. When he fired it, however, Theo didn't budge. Instead, an invisible form went rocketing through the air and collided with the wall of the corridor. The limp form of Severus Snape became visible. Tonk's curse, meant for the much larger Theo, had been way to powerful for little Severus, thus making things worse for the smaller first year.  
Rabastan had cast a dilusionment charm over Severus, who had been standing in front of Theo, ready to take any spell that came their way, in order to get Tonks in trouble. They were banking alot on Tonks fighting back, and fighting well.  
Everything went according to plan. Until Dumbledore figured out what really happened. At least, that's what I told my housemates.

* * *

**Track****: Breakaway - Kelly Clarkson**

Patricia hasn't stopped crying. Our entire house is crestfallen and depressed. Two expulsions! Two! And Rabastan was our leader! (After me, of course.) You may think we're over-reacting, but lets just say that being expelled from Hogwarts is a one-way ticket to failure. You can't get much of a job with only O.W.L scores, you need NEWTs! And those that will take O.W.L level employees will take one look at you, see that you were expelled, and dismiss you like a mosquito. Not to mention the shame brought to your family. Rabastan especially, is going to get grilled when he gets home.

Patricia has finally cried herself out and fallen asleep. Now I can go see Rabastan. I wont tell him. I can never tell my best friend that I'm the one that ruined his future.

* * *

Dumbledore really needs to step up security. The guard gargoyles are once again standing aside, letting anyone pass through. I thought Dumbledore was supposed to be smart? Oh well. I've made my way up the stairs, and I push open the door to the Headmaster's office just a crack. Dumbledore looks very troubled as he sits at his ornate desk, staring at a pile of parchment on his desk. I call:  
"Headmaster?"  
The older man looks up, startled, but smiles upon seeing me. His eyes are twinkling. Why are his eyes twinkling like that? He doesn't know it was me who told-no one does. The office was empty. It's a secret I'll take to the grave. Then, Dumbledore speaks:  
"Ah! Miss Black. I've been expecting you. What can assist you with?"  
"I need to see Rabastan." I say bluntly. It's not a request.  
Dumbledore's eyes remain sparkling. "Under the circumstances, we are keeping his visitors limited. However, you may certainly visit the boy. He's in the room behind me. Go right on in." With that, he returns to his work. I follow his directions and sure enough, there's a room on the other side of the Headmaster's office that I've never noticed. Rabastan is alone, asleep on the sofa.

I look at him. This boy I've known for years. A boy of only seventeen. I guess that isn't a boy. He's a man now. But I still remember the little boy I met so long ago. He looks younger too, right now, sleeping on that sofa. The sight before me is that of a peaceful boy, not a troubled young man. His brown hair is falling in front of his dark brown eyes, his defined muscles are relaxed. I never want him to wake up. He'll have to awake to the truth: his nightmare.

Sensing my presence, Rabastan's dark eyes fly open.  
"D!" He exclaims, jumping up and hugging me fiercely. He used his old nickname for me. I feel even worse now.  
"How are you?" I ask, as we sit on the sofa, grasping hands. I really am concerned. I sound it, too.  
He hesitates. Then:  
"D, I'm being expelled." He says it slowly, almost in a whisper.  
"I know! I know and it isn't fair!" I cry, and throw my arms around him. Tears stream down his cheeks as I cry in the arms of my best friend.

* * *

**In case anyone doesn't like the way Dumbledore and McGonagall announce everything to the entire school, I admit I'm not fond of it either. But I needed the shock factor for the story to work.**

**xoxo**


	27. Chapter 27

**Chibi-Lill, thanks again for your review! After I read it, I realized that this chapter has a lot of Rabastan in it, so here you go!**

* * *

**Track: Save Me - Nicki Minaj**

"D. Oh come on D, it's going to be alright. No more tears, Andromeda." Rabastan Lestrange is hugging me fiercely, as though he's daring sadness to attack his best friend. His cheeks are wet, but he's stopped crying. I too, buck up and turn off the water works. Slytherins don't cry. Blacks don't cry. Rabastan and Andromeda don't cry. We never cry.

"What's going to happen to you?" I ask, finally voicing the biggest of my fears.  
"I'll finish my seventh year in Durmstrang Institute." He replies solemnly.  
Durmstrang! But, Durmstrang is full of evil people even worse than the Slytherins! They're cold a mean!  
"No! No, no, no, no! You can't go to Durmstrang! The people there have no feelings! You can't end up that way!" I cry.  
"D, I'm not going to change! Durmstrang isn't bad! Look at the bright side: no mudbloods for the rest of the year! Durmstrang doesn't accept mudbloods! That's good, right?"  
My lip is quivering again.  
"Don't cry, where's the Andromeda I know who never shed a tear after she fell off her broom during Quidditch practice last year? I need you to be brave like that, D. For me." He finishes.

I hug him again, and we talk in the little room behind Dumbledore's office for the rest of the afternoon.

* * *

Rabastan doesn't understand why my lip was quivering. I've always overlooked his faults.  
His violence, his hatred, his pureblood mania; I never really noticed them.

I never _wanted_ to notice them.

Now they've come like a slap in the face. My best friend hates muggleborns. He _hates_ them. Rabastan literally thinks that muggleborns don't deserve to be alive. If you're not a pureblood, you don't deserve to walk on the same soil as him.  
I used to be there. I've worked so hard to climb out of that hole. I can't go back now. The damage is done. The truth has set me free.

Is this free?  
I am free.

In my mind. That's step one. I have control of my own mind now. I'm brainwashed no more. I can't even begin to comprehend the magnitude of this step. I have control over my own mind. I never realized I had lost it. I guess I never really had it. A pureblood society mainly comprised of my family had control over my thoughts and opinions since my birth. Now, I'm free. And it's so hard. But I've never been more grateful for anything in my life.

* * *

Things can't get any worse, right?

Wrong.  
Why did I have to jinx it?

Rabastan's life is crashing down around him. And it's entirely my fault.

Rabastan and Patricia were going at it in the common room. (Rabastan was aloud back for a short time.) The quarrel was a screaming match beat only by my fight with Tonks in the kitchens.  
Don't think about that, Andromeda.  
Focus on your two best friends.  
They were fighting, I've never seen either of them that angry.

"Rabastan! How the bloody hell is this _supposed_ to work? You've been expelled! You had to go be an idiot and get yourself and Theo kicked out and Severus put in the hospital! _How could you_?" Patricia cried.  
"How could I? _How could I? _I don't even know how that old bastard figured it out! My plan was flawless! There was nothing I could do!" Rabastan yelled.  
"Yes there was! You could've listened to me a stayed behind! _Why couldn't you just leave that useless Hufflepuff mudblood alone, anyway_?" Patricia hollered.  
By now a crowd of curious Slytherins were creeping up the stairs from the dormitories to catch some of the action. I however, was quick to swoop down upon them and kick them out of the common room with my wand raised. I never had to use it, though. One icy glare from me and they left running.  
"_How stupid are you_? He deserves everything that comes to him! _What's with you sticking up for filthy mudbloods, anyway_?" Rabastan shouted.  
"_Stupid? You're calling ME stupid? Says the idiot who got himself kicked out of Hogwarts in his SEVENTH YEAR! And no, I am not sticking up for him, idiot!"  
"_Listen up, bitch! I'm going through HELL right now! You are the last thing I need to deal with! I shouldn't have to defend myself to you! I thought you of all people would believe in me! _I'm done!_"

And I'm filled with deja-vu. Of Ted Tonks, betrayed by his childhood-friend-turned-longtime-girlfriend Desdemona. And now Rabastan. Abandoned and judged by the girl he swore he'd one day marry. Not many people know about that. Not that it matters now, anyway.

* * *

I'm sitting quietly on my bed in my dormitory, the seventh year girls, when I hear the door open.  
Then again, I don't have much time to process the door opening, because it opens so hard that it nearly falls off its hinges. In the doorway stands a livid Patricia Eaton.  
"_YOU_!" She screams, pointing at me.  
"Can I help you?" I reply snootily. I don't know what her issue is, but I will not be talked to that way by anyone. I have more self-respect than that.  
"You could've stopped him! If you had told him not to go, none of this would've happened! It's all your fault!" She cries.  
"What are you on about, Patricia?" I ask, calm but annoyed. I don't have the patience for this today.  
"Rabastan! He's going far away and he broke up with me and it's all your fault!"  
"Yeah, no. First, Rabastan is a big boy. He makes his own decisions and I respect his judgement, moreso than most of the buffoons in this house. Second, he dumped you because you're a shitty girlfriend. At the time when he needs you most, you turn on him and judge him! Making a scene in the common room? Come on, Patricia! We're not twelve! Rabastan doesn't need your shit! Especially not now!"  
I know I've won. I always do. I'm just smarter than the rest of them. That's not me being arrogant, it's just the truth. Not to mention I have a way with words. Patricia is utterly speechless. After trying to say something for a good ten seconds, she yells:  
"_I HATE YOU BOTH!_" And storms out. We've been friends since second year. And it's over, just like that.


	28. Chapter 28

I've been so wrapped up in my Slytherin issues that I almost forgot about a different large problem. I was reminded today in the cruelest, most abrupt fashion.

Enter, Ted Tonks.

He's off the hook. He can walk about the school as a free man.  
And Rabastan's being sent away to Durmstrang.

After my and Tonk's fight, I decided that I'd forget him and that'd be the end of it. It seemed pretty easy.  
When he wasn't around.  
When he is however, I can't bring myself to dislike him. _I can't even dislike him! _When I was leaving Dumbledore's office after visiting Rabastan (I do so daily) I felt really down about the whole thing. I needed to clear my head, and I didn't want to deal with Patricia. So I started walking. Who did I meet in the empty corridor?

Guess.

_Why is Ted everywhere! ?_  
Does he stalk me or something?

Before he got the chance to speak, I turned and walked away.

* * *

I can't face Tonks.  
Not after hearing exactly what he thinks of me.

Not after exposing that much of my damaged self.

I've never shown much of myself to anyone. I pretty one dimensional on the outside. No one knows what it's really like to be me. It's so complicated that I'd be here all day trying to sum it all up. It wouldn't make much sense anyway, because the life I live _doesn't_ make sense. No one would get it, except maybe Narcissa.  
But Ted? That lousy Hufflepuff has _no idea_!

I never expected him too though. And I know it's wrong to be angry at him for it. How could I be angry at his ignorance? Everyone _hates_ me for going along with the Black point of view. But that's just ignorance. I never knew any better. I still don't know much. I've just learnt a little on right and wrong. And that little bit has hurt like a bite from a blast-ended screwt!  
It stings more though.

Blast-ended screwt bites heal.

I don't know if I'll ever have a whole heart.

Why am I really angry at Tonks?  
What he said, for one thing.

But really, I never share my feelings with _anyone_. Never mind a muggle-born boy I barely know! But I did. In my anger, frustration and heart-brake, I broke down. I forgot my ice-cold exterior and told Ted Tonks what'd been playing in my mind for years; a constant soundtrack to my life of judgment and heartbreak. I let someone see a part of my mangled soul.

And it scares the hell out of me.

I don't know how to act now.  
What makes it worse is that Tonks will never tell a soul.  
I should be celebrating, right?  
But if he passed it off as nothing, "she's just another over-emotional girl, no big," then this whole thing wouldn't be such a big deal.

But it is a big deal. I've gone my entire life, put up with so much shit, and never breathed a peep about it to anyone. It's a difficult, lonely road. One that until now, I've always traveled, without question, alone.

And he knows it.

He knows how big of a step that was for me. That this was new territory, so carry a portable bomb shelter with you at all times, because new territory is dangerous territory. He knows that what he heard was a once in a lifetime deal, that I keep so much inside. And he'll never tell.

* * *

It's official.  
The staff found all of the proof they need. Theo and Rabastan are being expelled. They leave tomorrow.  
I run to Dumbledore's office as soon as I hear the news.

* * *

I'm crying.  
Again.  
_Pull it together Andromeda!_  
I can't. I just can't. I'm so tired. Everything is so hard.

I'm crying on the little couch in the back room behind Dumbledore's office in the muscled arms of my best friend. Rabastan is crying too, and neither of us are trying to stop at this point.  
I think we're crying partly _because_ we're crying.  
We can't control our tears. And before, tears were one of the few things we had control over.  
Now we've lost that.  
It feels like we've lost everything.

I tried to change Dumbledore's mind. I fell to my knees and begged. I begged and pleaded and blabbed on and on about Rabastan. About how he's my best friend and he's not really bad (which is a lie) and Durmstrang is evil and they beat pupils and how much I'll miss him and why isn't my good deed being rewarded?

"Pardon me, Miss Black, but which good deed are you referring to?" Dumbledore interrupted my babbling.  
Shit.  
"Never fear, child. I know of the note left on my desk. I'm sorry, but there is nothing to be done for your friend."

I pleaded Rabastan's case some more, to more avail. I finally started crying and ran to the room behind Dumbledore's desk where Rabastan was sitting.  
He heard the entire thing.  
At first I was worried he'd think I'd gone completely mental. But at this point I don't even care. I don't think he does, either. Because he simply scooped me into his lap and cradled me like a baby and we both balled our eyes out.

Behold, the heirs to the pureblood fortune, crying like children who fell off their bike.

Rabastan is leaving tomorrow.  
And now that we're wrapped in a tight hug, I don't know if I'll ever be able to let go.


	29. Chapter 29

**For pictures of Ted and Andromeda, the links are in my profile!**

* * *

My neck hurts.  
This doesn't feel like my bed.  
Where am I?  
I open my eyes.

Shit.

I'm laying on the couch in the little back room of Dumbledore's office, wrapped in the arms of Rabastan Lestrange.  
This probably looks bad.  
And right behind the Headmaster's desk!

Just to clarify, Mr. Lestrange and I have an entirely non-romantic relationship. He's my best friend. In his arms, I feel loved. I feel needed. Because Rabastan does need me; maybe even more than I need him. And I do need him. No, I don't need anyone! I _will_ survive!  
Rabastans dark eyes flutter open. He takes in the surroundings and our position.  
"This probably looks bad." He says quietly. I have to giggle. Even though we should be getting up and I should be high-tailing it out of there ASAP, I just can't. Not yet.

* * *

I'm the master of evasion.  
Yet Tonks still managed to track me down.

I finally had to leave Rabastan to get ready for his parents who're coming to get him later today. They're going to be furious, so he better look good. I also, need to make a good impression. The Lestranges are family now, I suppose.

So I'm walking through an empty corridor (when do I ever walk through an occupied corridor anymore?) and lo and behold, Mr. Blondie shows up. And I mean Tonks.

Now of all times? The reality of Rabastan leaving is crashing in around me and Ted picks _now_ to corner me?  
Bloody brilliant.

As reflex, I turn to walk away from a situation that is bound to be outside of my comfort zone. This time however, something gives.  
"Oh no you don't! Not this time, Andromeda!" Tonks calls out from behind me. I whirl on the spot.  
"And who's going to stop me?" I ask defiantly.  
_"Will you stop running away every time you see me?_" He asks, exasperated.  
"I don't owe you anything, Tonks!"  
"I'm sorry."  
That's all he said. Sorry. Then he stood there, with a pleading look on his face. Well, he picked the wrong day to catch me, I'm in no good for sunshine and butterflies.  
"No you're not! I haven't forgotten what you said! You told me exactly what you thought of me! Pretty words now aren't going to make that go away!" I holler.  
"_I didn't mean them!_" He has his hands in his blond hair, clearly frustrated.  
"That's _bullshit_! Oh yeah, and all that crap I said about you being a worthless mudblood at the end? Yeah,_ maybe I meant that_!" It's safe to assume I've won this round. I can't keep a smug look on my face though, when I see the hurt in his eyes. Then, the hurt turns to sadness. Why is he sad? He should look hurt!  
"You don't mean it." he replies simply. It's a statement, not a question.  
"_What would you know, Hufflepuff_? Of course I mean it!" I snap.  
"I know it was you." He states.  
"What are you on about?"  
"The note to Dumbledore. You told. You told the truth. You set me free." He says softly.

Shit.

"_HOW MANY PEOPLE KNOW?_" I yell. Okay. Fr-eak-ing OUT!  
"Wha- Hey, hey! Relax! No one knows. No one needs to know. It's just you, me and Dumbledore. No one else will find out. You're safe." He's trying to calm me down. So not working. I think of Rabastan crying more than I've ever seen him cry in his life.  
_"Yeah? What about him then? I tell the truth and save your sorry ass! So what's the trade-off? My best friend gets expelled! He gets sent away! They're sending him away today! How is Rabastan supposed to survive Durmstrang! Durmstrang is EVIL!" _I holler. Ted is taken aback.  
"Durmstrang? That's a rough place..."  
"_EVIL_! It is EVIL! _You're_ evil! I'm_ more_ evil! I got my best friend expelled to save your pathetic ass!"  
"Y-your best friend? Rabastan, he's your best friend?"  
I nod.  
"An-and you told the truth, for me, and he got in trouble?"  
I nod again.  
And he's being expelled and sent to that school?"  
I nod on last time.  
"You-you told. Even though it meant sending your best friend away. Why?" Ted asks.  
I shrug. I don't feel like talking all of a sudden. And I can't say why I did it. I can't let him see my shattered heart.  
"Andromeda-" He reaches out his hand. I recoil.  
"Don't touch me!_ I'm evil_! For once, _for the first time EVER,_ I did the right thing! Or I thought it was right! And look what happens! _I betrayed the one person who'll always love me! I ruined the future of my own best friend!_ All because I tried, for once, to do the right thing! _I give up!_ The "right thing" is over-rated!" Whyyy am I crying again?  
"I, I don't know what to say." Tonks says quietly.  
"There's nothing left _to_ say, except goodbye to my best friend." I say before taking off, running.

* * *

My eyes are no longer puffy and my nose isn't red anymore. I've redone my ruined makeup, fixed my long brown hair and changed my clothes. (I didn't change since I fell asleep with Rabastan.) Now that I look presentable, I can go find Rabastan and stay with him until he leaves Hogwarts. Forever.  
Thoughts like that will make you start crying again, idiot.


	30. Chapter 30

**Two chapters in one day! :O This is a gift for Jannice Sace's helpful reviews :)  
**

**Track: One Life - Hedley  
**

* * *

I found Rabastan, who was now packed and ready to go, and we snuck out of the Headmaster's office, despite Rabastan being told to stay put. He's expelled anyway, so why stop now?  
We ran up and down corridors, danced on the tables in the Great Hall, decorated McGonagall's office in streamers and confetti, (with wands, of course) and jumped onto the swinging branches of the whomping willow. It's not too too big, so it's fun to ride on the branches while they swing about. Rabastan was goign to throw me into the lake, but I reminded him that I'd just fixed my hair for his folks. He rolled his eyes but put me down. Then, we had a dance party with confetti and mini fireworks (thank you, Zonkos!) in the prefect bathroom with Peeves. It was a perfect day. We were so... alive. We were carefree. We weren't thinking about what anyone thought, about keeping up appearances, about looking tough, cool and in charge. It's like, little kids. Not us as little kids. When I was little I was expected to act like an adult. So today was even more foreign to us. It was amazing to just, live. Rabastan, of course, was making an absolute fool of himself. But he's never going to see Hogwarts again, so he didn't care.  
He didn't care.  
At all.  
He truly lived today.

We finished our grand tour of Hogwarts by visiting Severus in the hospital wing so Rabastan could say goodbye. Severus is awake now, just muddled in the head. Then, we returned to the common room where our friends were waiting. They took their turns saying goodbye to Rabastan and Theo, promising to write and to see them soon, to hang out after graduation (scary thought) the whole deal. Demetrius Nott, Evan Rosier, Lara, Lucius, Miranda Gies, Petina Knack, Narcissa, Timur Yaxley, Tarmac Crabbe and Vance Goyle, Carlile Selwyn, even little Parkinson were there, giving out hugs goodbye. Evan and Lucius looked utterly dreadful. I forgot that Theo would be leaving his best friends, too. It wasn't until later today that I noticed that Rowle and Dolohov were absent. Some friends. After the bittersweet but somehow cheerful goodbyes, Rabastan and I skipped arm and arm to the front of the castle (with Narcissa following behind in a more ladylike manner. She was giggling just the same) to await the Lestranges. Bella is coming along with Rodolphus, just to say hi. We had a long conversation about absolutely nothing and everything was perfect.  
Except the fact that it was only minutes until Rabastan left Hogwarts forever and was dragged away to Durmstrang, school of Evil.

* * *

**Track: Over My Head - The Fray**

Madam and Mr. Lestrange flooed in, but there was no Bellatrix. I waited, but there was no Rodulphus and no Bellatrix. The Lestranges were very cross indeed. Not with Rabastan, but with Dumbledore and the Heads who were present when the Lestranges and Dumbledore signed some papers. The Headmaster looked very troubled indeed. The Lestranges wanted to leave the moment the papers were signed, but Rabastan stalled by introducing Narcissa and I.  
"You remember the two younger Black sisters, don't you Mother and Father?" He said, gesturing to us. That sure improved their mood. They seemed very keen to talk to me, commenting on how much I look like Bella. Speaking of dear Bellatrix, she wanted very much to see us but she was feeling ill and who would come to this pathetic place they call a school unless forced anyway? Cissy managed to distract them, giving Rabastan and I a chance to say goodbye.  
For a while we just stood there, looking at each other. Until Rabastan broke it.  
"It's not forever, D."  
"Don't change." There. I told him. One of my biggest fears, out on the table.  
"I won't. When some Durmstrang bloke is picking a fight, I'll just remember us dancing on the Great Hall tables in front of a hundred people." He said, cracking a grin. I rushed forward and hugged him as tightly as my strength allowed me. Rabastan, not be outdone, picked me up and spun me around before setting me back down. Inside I was secretly grateful. He knew I'd have trouble letting go. He gave a quick hug to Narcissa before going to stand beside his parents. Speaking of his parents, they were looking at me funny. Was it the hugs? We're best friends, calm down. Rabastan finally got their attention and, waving goodbye, they flooed away. I blew my best friend a kiss and he returned it with a sad smile before whirling out of sight.

* * *

He's gone.  
And no one gets why I'm so upset.  
"Andromeda, it's not forever. Just the rest of the school year. You can see Rabastan all the time after graduation." Cissy says, putting a comforting hand on my back. I nod solemnly and manage a weak smile.  
"Hey Cissy? Go talk to Evan. He has to last two years of Hogwarts without Theo; he could probably use cheering up more than I could." I reply. My little sister squeezes my shoulder gently before walking away towards the dungeons.

No one understands.  
I can survive the year without Rabastan.  
But that's not the problem.  
The problem is, he's being sent to Durmstrang. Durmstrang Institute is a rough place full of violent students and evil teachers. There are fights there daily, and the teachers do nothing to stop it! They teach the Dark Arts there, which is sketchy if you ask me. I mean, almost everyone uses a little dark arts at one point or another, but teach it? If you do something bad enough there, you have to be target practice during the dark arts class when they're practicing spells as your punishment. I mean, that's a bit evil, right?

I know Rabastan. He goes with the flow. He's just like the old me, except he actually hates muggleborns. I don't hate muggleborns, I know that for sure now. However I'm still cautious around them; maybe a bit scared. Except Ted Tonks! I completely loose my head around the boy! I should just learn to keep my mouth _shut_ when he shows up.  
Back to Rabastan, he's easily influenced, and incredibly lazy most of the time. He'd never stand up for something other than blood purity, he'd never care. He doesn't care about right and wrong; because it'd be too much work to care. But now, he's on his way to Durmstrang. I know what's going to happen. He'll go bad. He'll turn into my parents, his parents, his brother, my sister. The pureblood mania is swallowing everyone I love. And Rabastan is next.


	31. Chapter 31

Life in Slytherin House is screwed up.

I mean, it was abnormal before, but abnormal _was_ normal for us.  
Rabastan is gone, and now everything's off balance. We have to find our new system.

We start with Quidditch.

Rabastan was chaser and Captain of our team. Demetrius Nott will take his chaser spot for the year, and the captaincy was awarded to Dolohov. That wasn't a good move, let me tell you. Dumbledore just can't choose between Evan and Lucius.  
Apparently the rest of our seventh year boys are all unworthy of a prefect title, because they're not appointing another one. I'm the only seventh year Slytherin Prefect now.

The thing that is most off-kilter in my house is the power. You see, we Black Sisters are always on top, no questions asked. But there's usually one boy who manages to become top-dog. That boy was Rabastan. Quidditch Captain, Chaser, Prefect, smart, rich, handsome, loved by the teachers, a Lestrange, guaranteed pureblood; he had it all! Now, who's going to take the top-dog spot? The boys all want it, although they never voice it out loud. Male leadership in our house goes unspoken.

Antonin is Quidditch Captain;  
Thorfinn is the best looking,  
Evan is the closest Black relative,  
and Lucius is the smartest.

Rabastan had it all. Now no one can agree on which buffoon is the lesser of the four evils. They're all stupid, not leaders in the slightest. Rabastan was. He's so easily influenced, but he pulls it off as though he's the one influencing everyone else. Now _that's_ talent.

* * *

We meet again, T.T.  
When will Tonks just give up on me?  
I mean, I always make him chase me down to talk to me. And when he does I'm a total cow to him.  
He's tracked me down, yet again.  
But this time, something's different.

I want him to catch me.

No I don't!

To prove it, I turn to walk away, poor Ted is talking to me, and stops mid-sentence.  
"Will you stop running away from your problems?" He calls. He's fed up.

Suddenly, several suits of armor have flown in front of me, blocking my way. I turn around.  
Tonks is there, wand out, looking at me. He walks closer. I'm overcome with deja-vu.

Thorfinn Rowle.  
Blocking my path,  
coming towards me.  
And I'm scared. I take two steps back and reach for my wand.  
"Don't come any closer!" I yell. But my voice is not the commanding, powerful tone it traditionally is. I sound crazed; scared to death. Tonks of course, never misses a beat.  
"What's wrong?"  
"I said stay away!" I yell wildly, raising my wand.  
"Andromeda-" I don't wait to hear the end of that sentence. This is survival. I strike.  
"_Flipendo!_" I cry.  
Tonks, always quick on his feet, deflects my jinx at a nearby table. The poor piece of furniture is flipped over completely.  
"_Furnunculus_!" I try again.  
Blocked, again.  
_"Reducto!"_  
Blocked.  
_"Stupefy!"_  
Blocked.  
_"Conjunctivitis!"  
_Blocked.  
I'm desperate.  
_"Cru-"_  
_"IMMOBULUS!"_ Tonks bellows, not letting me finish my sentence. I keel over on the ground, motionless. I can't move a muscle, except my eyeballs. This is it. After saving me from Thorfinn how many times, Ted is going to finish the job himself. I wasn't going to let it happen. I don't want to get raped.  
Curious. Despite the fact that I can't move anything, I can cry. My face is absolutely soaked with my own salty tears. I look over.  
Tonks is sitting against the wall, looking at me. His eyes are wet, and as big as dinner plates. He catches my eye, and says:  
"I never thought you'd use one." He sputters.  
I never thought I'd have to use an unforgivable either, especially not on him. But I'm so scared.  
I hear a mumble-  
"Relashio." It's Tonks. And I can move again. He used the counter-curse. Why? I look over. Ted has his head in his hands, covering his face. Only his perfect blond hair is visible. Why isn't he trying to rape me?  
_"RAPE YOU?"_ Tonks yells, looking up in utter disbelief. He looks like I've clubbed him over the head.  
Was I talking out loud?  
"Y-you thought I was-" He doesn't finish his sentence. He doesn't need to. I look him straight in the eye before bowing my head in shame. Thorfinn has ruined my ability to trust.  
"That's why you used it." Tonks mused out loud. That's why I used it. That's why I tried to crucio you, Tonks.  
"I'll kill him." He says darkly.  
He wants to make Thorfinn pay for making such a mess of me. I shake my head furiously. No one can know that Rowle had this much of an affect on me. If Ted duels Rowle, a thousand Slytherins will attack him until he's dead. I can't let either one happen. The tears are still running down my cheeks.

How did my life become so hopeless?

Tonks stands up and, painstakingly slowly, inches towards me, sitting on the ground with my arms hugging my knees to my chest. He sits slowly beside me and puts a cautious arm around my shoulder.  
He's so warm.  
I hug him tightly around his waist and cry.  
He takes me into his lap and puts his strong arms around me, stroking my hair while I bawl into his chest.

In Rabastan's arms, I felt needed.

I Tonks arms, I feel loved.  
But it's more than that.

I feel safe.

"I'll never let him hurt you." He whispers.

And I know;

I _am_ safe.

* * *

**IWishIWasAWeasley loves her reviewers! You guys are the greatest!**


	32. Chapter 32

**One of my favorite chapters by far! Enjoy!**

* * *

This is becoming a pattern.  
I cry myself to sleep an wake up in the arms of a cute boy.

What a skank.

Joking!

Ted _is_ cute, there's no denying it. His blond hair _always_ looks perfect, in a tousled "I don't put much effort into my hair it just naturally looks great because I'm a lucky bastard" way. His eyes are very strange. I can never decide if they're grey or beige. His face is the perfect balance between young and rugged. He doesn't have a baby face, but he doesn't look like he spent the year in Azkaban.

_How could Desdemona ever cheat on that?_

Shut up Andromeda.

You do not have feelings of any sort for the hot Hufflepuff.  
_None._

* * *

I've never had a boyfriend.

I don't think I've ever had a crush.

Now you think I'm abnormal.  
But think about it.  
My entire life I've been surrounded by boys who are  
a) evil  
b) stupid  
c) both

So don't be surprised. I can't just settle. Every time I think about my lack of boyfriend choices, I just tell myself that after graduation I'll meet some hot wizard prince and live happily ever after.

Keep dreaming, Andromeda.

* * *

I've been laying here on the floor in the arms of a dormant Ted during my entire thinking session. Thank Merlin it's Saturday. I didn't even attend classes for most of this week when Rabastan was around. I've gone to most since he left, but I just can't face Transfiguration.  
I look up at Ted's sleeping face. I decide to put my worries away for awhile and just, be. He's the only one I've ever been able to do that with. He makes me forget everything, like my mind is immersed in his very essence. It's freeing. Kind of like the truth.

Here's another truth:

I like him.

I like the Muggleborn Hufflepuff who's currently wrapped around me, sleeping.

This is bad.

Or is it?  
How can something so good be bad?  
He is good.  
He's _so_ good.  
Am I good?

I don't think so.  
I've done good, but I've done so much bad.

But Ted is just so _good_. He's perfect. It radiates off of him and makes _you_ want to be good. He always seems so, at peace. Like he has something that no one else has. Something that allows him to tackle whatever life throws at him. And you _want_ that! And that thing you want? That thing that sets him apart? It's good. He's good. You want good. You want to _be_ good. I know I do. Because whatever Ted has, I want it. I want peace. I want to be good.

Ted Tonks opens his eyes.

* * *

He's looking around for a moment, trying to remember where he is and why I'm currently nestled into his manly arms. He looks at me, unsure. I can read his beige-grey eyes like a book. He doesn't want to make me uncomfortable, and I'm usually running away from any closeness with him. I surprise him when I smile at him.

And I mean genuinely smile.

It's different than any other smile.  
I smile all the time with Rabastan, because I'm grateful that he's there, or we're having fun, laughing.  
But I'm smiling because I'm _happy_. I'm safe.

Maybe for me, safe _is_ happy.

It's contagious, because Ted smiles right back at me. Ohh boy. His smile. It sends tingles through me. That smile. It's the best thing in the world. I giggle and snuggle closer to him.

I never giggle.  
Or snuggle, for that matter.

* * *

I should be freaking out right now.

I LIKE A MUGGLEBORN!  
I could be disowned.  
Literally, disowned.

But when I'm with him, I forget my problems. They just, melt away.

After lying on the floor in peaceful bliss for awhile, we both knew our time was up. Plus my side was sore from not moving for so long. Ted finally spoke:  
"Hey Andromeda?"  
"Yes?"  
"I need your help."  
"With what?"  
We both sat up, and Tonks pulled off the blanket that was covering us. He held it in his arms for me to see.  
Wait a minute, that's a cloak. Not a blanket. And it's sort of transparent.  
"I've been trying to make an invisibility cloak out of this, but I'm not good enough at the disillusionment charm. Do you think you could give it a go?" He says.  
"What makes you think I'm any good at charms?" I ask.  
"Oh please. Remember that Scorgify you used the first time we met? That was crazy!" He says.  
"It was just a scorgify charm..."  
"But it was perfect! Come on, can you just try? Please?" He pleads. Not many people I know say please unless they're at someone else's house. But I am rather good with the disillusionment charm, so I decide to give it a try, and non verbally, at that!  
"There!" I state, pleased at my handiwork. The cloak has all but disappeared in Ted's arms.  
"I added a bedazzling hex, just to make sure." I say, smiling at him. He smiles widely back.  
"That's awesome! You're the best 'Dromeda!" He exclaims.  
Dromeda. I like it. It sounds sort of retarded, but I like it.

We stand, and throw our newly crafted invisibility cloak over top of us. Time to test out our new creation.


	33. Chapter 33

It's Saturday morning. Where am I?  
Huddled under a make-shift invisibility cloak with a hot muggleborn.  
What are we doing?  
Exploring.

And what's the first thing we come across?

Sirius.

My darling trouble-some cousin. He's with his little group of mates: James Potter, Remus? Is that his name? and some fat kid whose name I don't know. Guess who they're talking to?

Severus Snape.

He's allowed to leave the hospital a few times a day with the red head, Evans. I feel Ted stiffen like a board beside me. His eyes are huge. He hasn't seen Severus since the incident. I take his hand.  
"Hey, it's okay. You didn't do anything wrong." I say. I was planning on letting go of his hand, but he seems so distressed that I can't bring myself to do it. I listen in to what the first years before me are saying.

"BUTT TRUMPET! Snivellus Snape has a Butt Trumpet!" James Potter cries. Sirius and the fat boy are roaring with laughter. Remus is sitting to the side, pulling grass out of the ground in clumps with his fingers.  
"I do not!" Severus shoots back.  
"Butt Trumpet! Butt Trumpet!" James sings while Sirius dances around, doing a strange impression of a trumpet making weird noises from his butt.  
Butt Trumpet?  
Really?

First years are weird.

Or maybe it's just Gryffindors.

"Cut it out!" A new voice cuts in. Lily Evans emerges from the shadows. Potter's eyes go wide.  
"E-Evans. Hey!" He sputters. Man! He has got it _bad_!  
"Cut the crap, Potter. The answer is still no. Now, leave Sev alone!" She snaps.

I like this girl.

"But, Evans-" Potter starts.  
"Go away, you loathsome slug!" She yells.  
"Look at Snivellus, getting rescued by a _girl!_" Sirius jumps in. Well done cousin. _Really._ She will _roast_ you!

However, the girl seemed to be rather affective, because the four Gryffindors are now leaving. Severus turns to his best friend:  
"Why do you do that?" He asks.  
"Do what?" Lily replies.  
"Rescue me! I don't need you to come save me! They just make fun of me for it."  
"You're my best friend! Of course I'd stick up for you to those bullies! Wouldn't you stick up for me?" she asks.  
"Of course! But that's different!"  
"How?"  
"You're a girl. I'm a boy. Boys aren't supposed to get help from girls."  
"Girl, boy, pureblood, muggleborn, black, white, short, tall. We're all the same. I don't care what Potter and Black think, and neither should you."  
"I guess..." he says, unsure.  
"You shouldn't care what anyone thinks, Sev. I care about you. If someone can't accept who you are and who you care about, then they aren't worth it."  
"I never thought of it that way. You're right. I'm sorry."  
"That's okay."  
And Severus is looking at her, in that way look that I've only seen him have. His eyes light up and almost, dance. He's happy. Truly happy. Just looking at his best friend. I've never seen anyone look at another person that way.  
"Wanna go for a walk?" He asks, holding out his eleven-year-old hand.  
"Yeah." She answers, taking it. And the pair walk off towards the lake.

Ted leans forward and whispers in my ear:  
"If they can do it, why can't we?"

* * *

The days fly by due to my nightly excursions with Ted. It's freeing. We can walk around wherever we want together, and no one is going to hex us, because they can't see us! Most nights, we just lay under our cloak in the middle of the Quidditch pitch, and just talk. I guess we both want to get to know each other better, since we know pretty much nothing about one another. Finally, one night, he told me about Desdemona.

"Of course I care about Desdemona. We were best friends in muggle school. Then we found out we were both magical and going to Hogwarts. I'll never forget the feeling. But I can't be with her anymore. I tried breaking up with her once, but she's everywhere! She's imbedded in every part of my life! I can't escape her! Muggle world and wizarding world! In my muggle neighborhood and in Hufflepuff! She's everywhere! We did everything together as muggles. We survived in the wizarding world together. We built up our own community of friends, _together_. Our parents are friends! You'd think that after all that, we'd never fall apart, right? At one time, I thought so too. Now, everyone else thinks so, so they try and get us to stay together, because they think that's the only way we can be happy. But I wasn't. I wasn't happy. I guess staying together seemed, well, easier. Logical, you know? It seemed like the only thing to do really. And it's _so_ hard for me to knowingly upset someone! Desdemona said some Ravenclaw tried to rape her last year. I kicked his face in. Got in a lot of trouble for it, too. I just found out that she'd lied. I never believed the other Ravenclaws who insisted that Desdemona was cheating with him and made up some wild story when they got caught. I never believed them." He said.

"All I really want is for everyone to get along. Yet that year, I made enemies." He finished.  
"Do you know why she did it? I asked. I admit it, I was fishing. He's so perfect. There's got to be _something_ wrong with him!  
"I asked her once. She said I acted like I didn't care about her. The truth is, I didn't want to be with Desdemona, so I guess it showed. We should've just broken up before everyone got hurt, but Desdemona never thinks."  
"Do you think you're over her?" I ask.  
"I was a long time ago, which is why she found that Ravenclaw, I guess."

"Why are you so perfect?" I ask.  
"What?" He's taken by surprise.  
"Why are you so perfect?" I repeat.  
"I'm not perfect." He replies.  
"You're closer to it than anyone I've ever met."  
"I think you're pretty damn close." He says.  
"Me? Yeah, no." I say. Because I'm not. I'm so far from perfect. Does he have no standards? Ted looks me in the eye and says:

"You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly."

And then he kisses me.

* * *

**For those of you who don't fully understand the "Butt Trumpet," go watch "A Very Potter Sequel" on YouTube. :)**


	34. Chapter 34

How do I feel about kissing a mudblood?  
(You know I don't mean that.)  
I've never been kissed before, so I don't have much to compare it with.  
If you laugh I will hex you.

But how do I feel about kissing Ted?  
Happy  
Content  
At peace.  
Something's fallen in place.  
It's just, right.  
I'm still so confused about right and wrong.  
But this? This is right. This is perfect.

* * *

I haven't seen Ted in days.

Why?  
We've been avoiding each other.

We were on one of our adventures the day after our first kiss. We were under our cloak, having a ball. We were making faces at Slughorn as he walked by.  
Then, a group of Slytherins showed up. Thorfinn, Antonin, Lara, Demetrius, Evan, Narcissa, and Lucius.  
I nearly screamed. Ted sensed it, and covered my mouth with his hand. Even so, he tensed up a great deal. My blood went cold.

What if they could see us?  
What would they do to us?

I don't know.  
But it made me think.  
Is it worth it? Is this a good idea? What will my family say? Are we going to be happy if we have to keep everything a secret?

What questions are running through his head?  
I don't know.  
But I'm confused.  
I remember the words of Lily Evans, and think maybe we're not totally insane. Then I see Sirius open another angry letter from his mum and wanna hit myself for being such an idiot!

Since our nightly adventures have been called off while we avoid one another, I've taken to laying in the Quidditch pitch by myself. Under a disillusionment charm, of course. It's not as good as the cloak, but it's dark and I'm in the middle of a field, so I should be fine. Yet, despite my assurances, I feel someone watching me every night.

I try throwing myself into my studies to take my mind off of Ted-I'm still behind in Transfiguration from skipping-but it doesn't work. I'm always daydreaming and thinking about him. Reality catches up after Transfiguration class.

* * *

"Miss Black, may I speak to you for a moment?" McGonagall asks in that unfailingly interesting accent of hers.  
"What is it, Professor?" I reply.  
"Miss Black, I must call it to your attention that you are failing my class."

Shit.

"Um, well, I, um..."  
"You've shown effort in the past, Miss Black. I understand you've gone through some difficult circumstances lately, so I've arranged for you a tutor. He has the highest mark in the class and has agreed to help you and to not mention it to anyone. Are you in accord with this?" McGonagall says.  
"What? Oh um, I-I, yes, I do need to pass." What my parents would say if I didn't!  
"Good. You can meet with him tonight." McGonagall turns to leave.  
"Professor! Um, who is my, tutor?" I inquire.  
"Ted Tonks." She replies simply before walking away.

Shit.

* * *

This is a higher power kicking me in the butt.

I'm being tutored by Ted.  
I have to sit in a deserted classroom with just him every night until I improve in Transfiguration.  
Since I'm _never_ going to improve, we'll probably be meeting every night for the rest of the year.

This is going to be_ so_ painful!

* * *

"Why are we here?" I ask.

I'm sitting in McGonagall's empty classroom with Ted. We've been sitting here, reading separate Transfiguration books on the opposite sides of the table and sneaking looks at each other. I was right, this has been _very_ painful.

"I'm not going to let you fail Transfiguration." He replies sternly, still looking at his book.  
"Why not?" I ask. He stops. I can almost hear the wheels in his head turning beneath his amazing hair. Why not?  
I send the book flying out of his hands with me wand. Our eyes lock.

"Why are you tutoring me Ted? Because we both know it's more than that. Why have you always believed in me?" I ask.

He sits silently for awhile, collecting his thoughts, then he starts:  
"At first, I found you intriguing. I believe in the good in people. Yet there you were, cold, untouchable. I thought there had to be more to you than that. I wanted to be the one to unearth it. Like, a quest."  
"But soon, I realized just how much there was to discover in you, and it stopped being about the challenge, and more about the reward. I knew you weren't happy. I wanted you to be happy. Seeing someone become happy after seeing them so far from it is the reward."

I interrupt:  
"So, you make people happy, just to see them happy? Even though you don't gain anything from it?"

"Well, it _is_ nice when they thank you, but that's not important to me." Ted continues. "Besides, you're different. I make people happy to see someone happy. I wanted to see you happy because I wanted _you_ to be happy. Not just see a girl happy, but see you_, Andromeda,_ happy."

"But why me?" I ask.

"That's like asking why I love the color blue." He says. "Why not blue? It's like, how could I pick one reason why blue is so great? Because everything about blue is what makes it blue. Blue can make you sad, but sometimes a sad blue is comfort when you're already sad. Sometimes blue can be calming, or blue can be bright and exciting. Pair blue with red and you get purple. There are so many different shades of blue."

"Why you? Why not you? How could I pick on reason, sum it up in one sentence? Everything about you makes you, you. There are so many different shades of you, so many different sides, I might never get to meet them all. But I really want to. Most people only get to see that first side of you, the stone-cold exterior. A few people, maybe Rabastan and your sisters, get to see other sides of you. Happy, sad, angry, scared. But there's still so much more to you, buried like treasure. I want that treasure. I wanna find it, like a pirate, even though there's no map and the ocean I have to sail on is way dangerous. Even though common sense is whacking my skull, shouting 'What are you doing?' I know, that when I find that treasure deep beneath the sand, it'll all be worth it."

What do I say to that?

* * *

**So, this was probably my favorite chapter ever to write, or just the last bit anyway :)**


	35. Chapter 35

**Fun Fact: I wrote a provincial exam today (I'm Canadian) and I had Draco Malfoy singing in A Very Potter Musical stuck in my head throughout the entire eight hour exam -.-**

* * *

He's to good for me.

I mean, he's perfect.  
He insists that he isn't, but he has yet to prove his theory.

He's always the first to apologize. He's so level headed and calm, no matter what, even if I'm screaming at the unfairness of it all, even if a gang of Slytherins are giving him weird looks, he's always calm and quick thinking. He almost never gets mad.

Bloody perfect.

* * *

"What do you wanna be when you grow up?"

Ted and I are having another late night convo in the middle of the dark Quidditch pitch.  
"Umm, I've never thought about it." I reply.  
"Why not?" He asks.  
"Because when I grow up I'm supposed to marry a rich kid and take care of his kids for the rest of my life." I state. It's the truth.  
"You're joking."  
"Serious."  
"Wow." Ted looks so... sad. I manage a weak smile and say:  
"Then you showed up and put a wrench in that plan, wont mummy and daddy be pleased?"  
He tries to smile back, but he still looks sad.  
"So what would you do if you could do anything you wanted?" He questions.  
"Um, I don't know…" No one's ever asked me that before.  
"There must be something."  
"I've never thought about it." That's the truth. I never wanted to be disappointment that I didn't get to fulfill my dreams. So up until now, I haven't had any.  
"You don't even have an idea?" Ted asks.  
"No, so will you stop pressuring me?" I snap. This is making me realize just how wrong all seventeen years of my life has been. It's not a good feeling.  
"I'm just curious! There's gotta be something!" He seems a little annoyed. Which makes me annoyed.  
"No Ted, there isn't! I said I don't know, and I don't! So can we stop with all the questions!"  
"I'm just- never mind." He runs a hand through his perfect blond hair. Never mind? Yea, never mind then! Angry, I get up and begin to walk away, towards the castle.

"'Dromeda, come on!" He calls after me. I stop and turn to face him, arms crossed.

"Look, I'm sorry, okay? I'm not perfect, no one is. We've lived completely different lives up until this point. There are a lot of things we don't understand about each other, so if this is going to work, we have to figure this crap out as we go. But I need you to work with me, you can't just leave every time you're uncomfortable."

Arms still crossed, I return to the spot of grass he's still sitting on and wrap my arms around his waist and squeeze out my frustration.  
"You're still scowling." Ted comments.  
"Deal with it, pretty boy." I huff.  
"You're cute when you scowl."  
My scowl deepens, which makes him laugh.  
Ted's laugh. It's full and carefree. My favorite sound in the world. Ted's laugh always makes my anger melt away. I feel myself smile. Ted says:

"You're cute when you scowl, but you're beautiful when you smile."

* * *

It's my turn to keep our cloak, so I'm going to have some fun.

I wonder what the castle's like when I'm not around? When people aren't whispering and looking over their shoulders, afraid that I'll crucio them is they turn their backs for the slightest moment.

I guess today I find out!

* * *

Cheerful.

Everything in this bloody castle is so bloody cheerful!

_Complete_ opposite from the dungeons!

It's more than that, though. The laughter, the smiles, the very air is happy and carefree! Carefree, and peaceful.

Just like him.  
Just like Ted.

It makes me wonder, if maybe the entire wizarding _world_ is like this! Big, open, happy, nonjudgmental. Free.

If I could live like this all the time, I don't think I'd ever die!  
Or sleep.  
I'll have to work on that.

But it's so, hopeful! There are so many places to see, things to discover!

Like, finding your favorite food! You travel the world, hunting for it! Until one day, in some far-off, exotic little village, you try their local specialty who's name you can't even pronounce because it's in a different language, which is probably good because you probably wouldn't try it if you new the weird stuff they put in it. But you don't know, so you try it while the old lady who makes this strange food watches happily as some traveler from a distant land finds exactly what they've been looking for, right at her food cart. And you spend the rest of your family's fortune importing this stuff for the rest of your life and that old lady gets so much money from you that at last she can buy a real house for herself and her orphaned grandchildren. And you never ask what's in this strange food because you love it just as it is and for once you stop asking questions because for once, for the first time ever, you're content with not knowing and just being.

I read that in a book once.

I didn't like that book.  
I didn't understand it.

I didn't understand it, because I didn't understand what living was.  
I think I'm starting to get it now.

* * *

I could run around in this cloak _forever!_  
Nothing can hold me back!  
Nothing.

Not appearances,  
not reputation,  
not expectations,  
not my parents,  
not my housemates,  
not even Bella can stop me now.

I might never take it off.

The only thing not-perfect is knowing that all these smiles would be gone in a flash if people could see me.

* * *

My near-perfect, blissful day comes to a halt when I hear two things:  
Crying,  
and Ted.

There! By the lake! It's Ted! And-  
The Evans girl. Lily. Severus' best friend.

"I-I don't know what to do, Ted! He's my best friend! But you know what he did!" Lily sputters.  
"He was pressured into it, Lily, he told us that. It wasn't his fault." Ted replies soothingly. He still feels bad about accidentally hexing Snape.  
"B-but that's just it! He wasn't. I know he wasn't! He feels left out in his house. In Slytherin, beating up muggleborns like _us_ is c-c-cool!" She cries.  
"Shhh. Lily, shhh. It'll be alright."  
"N-n-no, it wont! He's going bad! I know it! I can't tell this to my other friends, because they already hate Sev. They'd say 'I told you so!' and hate him more! But that house! Everyone in that house is bad! I don't want Sev to go bad!"  
"Hey Lily, can you keep a secret?"  
"Yea!"  
"No, I mean a real secret. If you tell, someone will be in danger. Can you keep a secret like that and keep someone safe?" Ted whispers.  
"Hmm. Yea! Yea, I can." Lily whispers back.  
"I have a friend in Slytherin too." Ted says.  
"YOU DO?"  
"Sure do."  
"WHO?"  
"I can't tell you, they might be in danger. But I can tell you about them?"  
"Okay!"

"When you look at my friend, you immediately think she's mean. She walks around like she owns the place with no expression on her face. Most people think she's evil and that she hates muggleborns. For awhile, I thought she hated them too. But she doesn't. And you know what? There is so much more to her than you could _ever_ find out by watching her. She's goofy, sarcastic, lovable, caring, unique, warmhearted, humble and loyal. She's the most loyal person I've ever met. She always puts others first. The sorting hat messed up, she belongs in Hufflepuff! And she's a good person. She's a good person who hasn't realized it yet, because she's done bad things. She has messed up. We all mess up, but that's how we learn. Before, she didn't know. But now she does. And she learns. And at the end of the day, that's all we can really ask for. So does Severus mess up? Yea, he does. But some people need to learn the hard way. Others have no choice but to learn the hard way. Others like my friend, and Sev. But her mess-ups are beautiful. Every time she messes up or gets angry, it's beautiful. Because you can almost see the change happening, even though she can't."

"She's not perfect then?" Lily asks.  
"By societies standards, no." Ted replies.  
"Then I think that's better than being perfect. Imperfection makes us improve. It makes us grow."

I will never forget the wisdom of eleven year-old Lily Evans.

"Just remember Lily, no one can change a person. But a person can be the reason someone changes."

I will never forget him.


	36. Chapter 36

**To my beautiful reviewers, you guys are the best! And I promise to reply to your amazing reviews very soon, so keep writing! xo**

* * *

_My dearest little sisters,_

_I miss you two so much! You girls being stuck in that rubbish school is stupid! I could teach you everything you need to know to succeed in the world myself, you don't need those know-it-all teachers!_

_How are you? Rabastan came to stay for a few days before leaving for Bulgaria. He said Andromeda was very down about him leaving. Sister, don't worry. We'll all be home together before you know it! How dare that old fool kick Rabastan Lestrange out of Hogwarts! I always knew Dumbledore had it out for us. I'd come down there and give the idiot a piece of my mind, but the Lestranges said the place was utterly dreadful and that I wouldn't want to lower myself just to put Dumbledore in his place, so I guess I'll leave that to you two ;)_

_Speaking of Madame and Mr. Lestrange, they were most impressed with you two! Andromeda in particular! They were raving to Mother and Father about how ladylike you two are, and how grown up and beautiful Andromeda's become! Our parents were so pleased! It sounds like your meeting went fabulously! I'm so proud of my little sisters!_

_I'm sorry I couldn't come to visit, but I really didn't feel well. I've been getting more exercise you see, I've entered a sort of boot-camp. It's very exciting! I'm learning all sorts of magic that the Hogwarts teachers could never even dream of! I've become much stronger in my abilities. My teacher is amazing! He's so powerful! His skill is unlike anything I've ever seen! All those Dumbledore worshipers have clearly never met my teacher! And, he said that I'm a very promising student with much talent, who may some day serve him well! Isn't that fantastic? I told you the teachers at that bum school didn't know what they're talking about! Even Mother was proud of me!_

_Well, this letter is long enough, so I'll end here. Fear not, my sisters. We'll be together soon enough. I don't say it much, but I love you both. Do me a favor and plant a dungbomb in McGonagall's desk. That bat of a woman needs to be put in her place!  
_

_See you soon, dear hearts!  
_

_P.S. There is an additional note in the bottom of the envelope. That note is for all the seventh years, so make sure they read it!  
_

_Your big sister,  
_

_Bellatrix Lestrange_

* * *

"I hate the last line." I say sarcastically. Narcissa, who's sitting beside me reading with me, nods her blond head solemnly in agreement.  
Bellatrix BLACK!  
_Not "Mrs. Bellatrix Lestraannggee."  
_Hmph.

The letter was lovely, though. But new magic? What sort of magic could Bella be learning? Who's this brilliant teacher of hers?  
"I like the bit about McGonagall, reminds us that it's really Bella writing the letter." Cissy points out. We both burst into giggles.  
"There _is_ that first part, when she says she could teach us herself better than the entire Hogwarts staff? That sounds like Bella!" I offer. More giggles.  
"But seriously, lets see that note to the seventh years." She says.  
"Alright." I reply. I fish the folded parchment from the envelope that our family owl delivered and opened it.

* * *

_To the Seventh Year Students of the noble Slytherin House._

_The honorable Lord Voldemort requires your service in the fight for pureblood supremacy.  
We cannot let mudbloods and half-breeds over-run our society. Now is the time to present your loyalties.  
_

_Time and place of meeting for interested Death Eaters to be announced in the near future._

_Mudbloods need not apply.  
_

_≈≈†≈≈  
_

* * *

We sit there, the note clenched in my tense hands, and stare._  
_

Voldemort?

VOLDEMORT?

Why would Bella send us this! My head is reeling. What does this mean?  
This means that Lord Voldemort himself wants to recruit my classmates for his "Death Eaters."

Bloody hell.  
This means, he wants to recruit ME!

Fight the "mudbloods?"  
Ted.

I wont show them. I wont show this note to any seventh years, or anyone for that matter! I'll burn it! Being a Death Eater could get you killed! Or you might kill someone else.  
Someone like Ted.

My thoughts are interrupted by Thorfinn and Antonin.

"What'cha got there ladies?" Antonin asks, snatching the note from my hands.  
NO!  
"Are you serious?" Thorfinn whispers, reading over Antonin's shoulder.  
"No way!" Antonin whispers.

They pour over the note silently, then whisper between themselves.  
"So, when were you planning on showing this to us, Andromeda? Not trying to hog the glory all for yourself, were you?" Antonin asks. _That little bastard!  
_"Shut your trap, Dolohov. We just received it in the post from Bellatrix." Cissy cuts in coldly. Narcissa is such a good actress, honestly. It's a shame Dumbledore outlawed the drama club in Hogwarts after the mishap how many years ago.

"Whatever. We're going to show it to the rest!" Thorfinn jumps in. With that, the two boys hurry off towards the dungeons.  
"Lets go." I say to Narcissa.

* * *

The seventh years (and Narcissa) are huddled together, discussing the note is whispers. Hell, even the Casavants are here. They don't seem to keen on being Death Eaters though, however they have offered to be the official entertainment.

Suddenly, I hear a sound that makes me want to punch a pygmy puff in the face!  
And pygmy puffs are cute!  
A girly voice;

Patricia Eaton.

You know, ex best friend? Ex girlfriend of Rabastan? Biggest bitch in this bitch-hole we call a house?  
Yeah, that's the one!

"What are you all whispering about?" She asks.  
"None of your concern, scum." I reply without looking her way.  
"You listen here, Andromeda! Being a "Black" doesn't make you royalty! I don't care what you think! You don't think for everyone else here!" She shoots back.  
Oh really. This pathetic excuse of a human being wants to start with me?  
Her funeral.  
"True as it may be, most of them can think for themselves, that's irrelevant, because we all hate you. You betrayed our house." I say calmly.  
"I didn't betray anyone! You betrayed me! Rabastan would still be here if you had stopped him!" She shouts.  
"You are so unintelligent! You _just_ said that I don't think for everyone else? He's a big boy. Turns out Dumbledore is smarter than we thought. Everyone agrees, you turned on Rabastan in his time of need, and Rabastan was our friend. You and your immature drama are unwanted here so leave." I snap.  
Owned.  
"The only person I have a problem with here is _you_, Andromeda!" Patricia snaps.  
"Patricia, you're dead to us. Now quite wasting oxygen." Lara says lazily.  
"Honestly, you don't know when to stop. We all hate you." Thorfinn growls.  
"By having a problem with Andromeda, you have a problem with all of us." Narcissa cuts in. I have the best little sister ever!  
"You're not in this, Bellatrix Junior Junior!" Patricia yells.  
Oh, she did not!  
All eyes turn to me. I guess I look as livid as I feel. Good. In a nanosecond, I've pointed my wand at the new outcast of Slytherin house, and say:  
"_Furnunculus!_"

Lucky Patricia will get to enjoy a healthy dosage of boils until the spell wears off. The girl runs out of the room, hiding her face.

Bitch, please.


	37. Chapter 37

"Note to the seventh years?' What's that?" Ted asks.  
I don't really want Ted to see the note, but he needs to know. And I'm worried.  
"Read this." I hand him the parchment and explain that Bella had sent it in her letter.  
His eyes darkens as he scowls at the note. It makes me want to crawl up and die for being associated for something like that.  
"Hey now, it's not your fault. Don't look so down like that." Ted can always read my face.  
"It makes me want to crawl up and die for you to see me be associated for something like that." I sigh.

That's it.

That's IT!

"That's it!" I shout gleefully.  
"Wha?"  
"I'm ashamed! I'm ashamed of my house and my family! I'm ashamed of their views of muggleborns! I'm there! Ted, I'm there! I'm like, good! Or something!"  
"Dromeda! Hey, that's great!" He exclaims. There's that smile again. Ted swoops me into a bear hug, lifting me off my feet and twirling me around and around. And something else it seems, feels right. Somethings been lifted from my shoulders. I've taken control.  
I'm free.

* * *

"_That's_ where you disappear to every night!"  
"Evan."  
"I can't _believe_ you never told me!"  
"Evan."  
"How could you _not_ tell me?"  
"Evan..."  
"Did you tell Theo? I bet you didn't! He got shipped away and you never even told him!"  
"Evan-"  
"Why would you hide something like this? Some best mate you turned out to be!"  
"EVAN LUCIFER ROSIER!"

I look up from my book. I haven't read "The Tales of Beedle the Bard" in years. I'm finally reading "The Fountain of Fair Fortune." No one's ever read this story to me before. There's a muggle prince in the story. Muggles are "evil."

So, why are the "best-mates-forever" Lucius Malfoy and Evan Rosier currently having a shouting match in the common room?

_"WHAT, Lucius Abraxas Malfoy?" _Evan spits back.  
"Am I dating someone? Yes. Have been all year. Yes, I should've told you sooner. Now will you quit making a scene!" Lucius hisses.  
"Whatever!" And with that, Evan turns his back on his best friend, and storms out.

Well, we now know why Lucius is always absent for the Casavant twins' nightly entertainment.

* * *

"How does your hair always look perfect?" I ask.  
"What?" replies a confused looking Ted.  
"Your hair. It always looks perfect. How?"  
"My hair is always messy, 'Dromeda."  
"Yea, but it's like, controlled messiness! How does it do that?"  
"Why is your hair brown?" He asks.  
"Father says it's in my blood." I reply without thinking.  
Shit. I said the B-word.  
"Blood?"  
"No, no! Not like that! It's just, brown eyes are in my blood, grey-beige eyes that wont make up their minds are in your blood, dark eyes are in Bellatrix and Rabastan's blood. Red hair is in Lily's blood. Runs in the family, in your blood, like that! Does that make sense?"  
"It sounds like DNA..." He says.  
"DNA? What's that?" What the Helga is he on about?  
And so Tonks spends the rest of the afternoon, telling me about DNA and other muggle things.

* * *

"Alright Andromeda, spill it."  
Huh?  
"This is an intervention, girl!"

I look up from my book, yet again. So many interruptions today.  
Lara Selwyn and Paisley Crouch, my favorite cousin, are now before me.

"Excuse me?" I'm very confused here...  
"Something's been up and we want to know what." Lara states.  
"You've been disappearing every night since, ever! We gotta know!" Paisley, the clever Ravenclaw, knows when to explain things.

Shit.

* * *

"I avoided the question by bringing out the note to the seventh years to show Paisley. It worked, but I don't know how I'd get out of answering a second time." I finish.  
I'm retelling my run in with my pureblood girlfriends to Ted.

"Ted. Is this worth the risk?"  
"Is this worth it? Absolutely. I've never felt this way about anybody. Nothing compares to the way I feel when I'm with you. But are we willing to pay? What are we willing to lose?" Ted replies.  
We're silent for awhile, processing our thoughts.  
"Andromeda; what would they do to me?" Ted finally asks.

"They'd hate you. They'd target you and attack you, and they'd keep coming after you until they finish you. You know how Septimus Weasley just died? He's a blood-traitor, and he married Cedrella Black. They said a spell backfired on him, but Ted, I don't think that's true. My Great Great Aunt Isla married a muggleborn, Bob Hitchens. They killed them both. They'll be angry. My family will blame you for "leading me astray."

"What would they do to you?"

"My family likes to "prune the branches" of our family tree. I'd be disowned. But in this case, ignoring my existence wouldn't be enough. They'd want me erased completely. They'd be mad at you, but they'd want me dead. Dead, so I couldn't bring further shame to them. Eliminate the problem." I've known the truth all along, I've just been ignoring it until now. I can't ignore it any longer, the stakes are too high.

"Sirius is in Gryffindor? He's still fine." Ted says hopefully.  
"That's different. Our family hates him, just for that. But marriage, marriage is the single most important thing in the house of Black. I'm supposed to marry only the greatest bachelor in the land; one who will boost either the Black family's wealth, influence or prestige. If it doesn't make the old Blacks feel better about themselves, it's not happening. Marriage is everything to purebloods." I reply.

"What are we willing to lose?" He asks.

What am I willing to lose?


	38. Chapter 38

**I finally replied to my fabulous reviews! To my amazing reviewers: Thank you! You guys are the best! xoxo  
**

* * *

We've been moving forward so quickly, so effortlessly. (The last part's a lie, it took a lot of effort.) Now, everything's come to a screeching halt.

Lets call it, reality.

What. A. Bitch.

* * *

"Andromeda, listen! We're not doing anything wrong!" Ted says to me. We're discussing "us," and if there is going to be an "us" in the future. There are so many hoops to jump through. I feel so hopeless.

"I'm disobeying my family! _How isn't that wrong?_"  
"Maybe your family is wrong! _Ever considered that?_"

How could he?  
He knows what they mean to me.  
My blood goes cold, my mind draws blank. All I can think about is him, and his words.

"I shouldn't have said that-" He starts. I'm not going to hear it!  
"How dare you speak against my family!" I shout.

Then, for maybe the first time, he loses it.

"WHAT ABOUT ALL THE SHIT THEY SAY ABOUT ME!"  
"They don't even know who you are!"  
"A MUDBLOOD! THAT'S WHAT I AM! A MUDBLOOD! They don't care who I am! My blood is filthy and that's all that matters to them! _HOW ISN'T THAT WRONG?_"

"_What's right and what's wrong_? I don't even know anymore!" I start.  
It's not fair! Why is everything so hard! Whatever I do is going to be bad for someone! Whatever bad comes to someone, it's going to be my fault! Your life is so easy and perfect! I want that! Why can't I have that? _How can the people who I love so much be so bad_?"

Ted pulls me close. Instead of melting like I usually do, my frustration explodes. My hands balled up into fists, I pound on his muscled chest. He says nothing as I have my meltdown, wordlessly absorbing my blows of frustration. I'm surprisingly weak for a Quidditch player.  
I shouldn't be taking out my pent up emotions on him, but I can't stop. I guess this is what it's like to crack. Years of enduring so much pain and loneliness and never showing it has finally caught up to me. So I stand here, pounding out my anger at how unfair it all is, and how hopeless my life is, on the tall figure of the most perfect boy in the world. The one who never gave up on me. The one who knows how broken and lost I am but stuck around anyway. I think I need him, and it scares me to death.

I've exhausted myself, so I fall into his tight embrace and stop thinking. And we stand there, shaking, my tears falling on his t-shirt, without saying a word.

* * *

I never realized what I did until this morning.

When Bella gets angry, she uses her wand to let out her emotions. I've tried it so many times, but it never works. I just feel like a failure for loosing my composure. I told this to Ted once, and he said:  
"Wands aren't the answer for everything. There are some things-though not many-that muggles have worked out better than us wizards."  
"Muggles? What could they have come up with better than magic?" I scoffed.

"Stress relief. They get their emotions out either by talking, or hitting stuff."  
"Hitting stuff?" What the Helga is he on about!  
"Hitting stuff. Punching a pillow, punching a person, even punching a wall. In a bad case I've seen someone throw something."  
"THROW SOMETHING!" B-b-but, Muggles, they weren't supposed to be dangerous! They can't be right! They can't!" I cried.

"Who can't be right?"

"Everyone! My parents, my sister, my aunts, uncles, cousins, housemates; everyone! They always say that Muggles are dirty, that they're partial animals, that they're violent and they want to steal magic from purebloods and use it against us! They can't be right! If they are my entire life for the past year has been one big lie!" I'm nearly hysterical by now.  
"Dromeda, calm down! It's okay! I should've explained better, I should've known it'd upset you. But listen. Muggles don't use wands, they only have physical strength. While they are stronger than wizards because they use their muscles for everything, they can only inflict damage with their hands. When they throw stuff, they don't throw it at other people, at least the decent ones don't. But Andromeda, muggles are just like us. There are good muggles and bad muggles; peaceful muggles and violent muggles. There are good wizards and bad wizards; peaceful wizards and violent wizards. We just use different methods. However, when it comes to releasing emotions, muggles have it figured out better than we do. Try it sometime. It's easier to get things out the muggle way."

I never realized what I did until this morning.

I did something the muggle way.

* * *

Here we are again, trying to make sense of what we want and what we'll lose to get it. Ted is sitting with his head in hands, running his fingers through his perfect hair. Even after him messing it up, his hair still looks as it should.

"You love your family. We're supposed to love our families. Yet your family will kill you and I if we become 'us.' How can you love them knowing that? But how do you stop loving your family? You shouldn't have to." Ted says sadly. We're both silent, because neither of us know the answer to this problem. I doubt even Albus Dumbledore would know the answer to this problem.

"Look at us. We're fighting already. How is this supposed to work?" He says hopelessly.  
And that's the first time he's ever voiced any doubt about us. Part of me wants to curl up and cry. But I've cried way too much lately. The crying stops now. It's time for action; time to bring the strong Andromeda back. And it starts now.  
"Ted, you live in a world of sunshine and smiling badgers. You think every relationship has to be perfect. But it doesn't. No relationship is perfect; it takes work. People fight. But as long as it's still worth it to make up, then it works out in the end." I'm ignorant of so many things, but one thing I know from experience is that relationships aren't perfect. That's what makes them real. My sisters and I have had our spats, but we come out closer in the end. And it's always been worth it.

But what's actually worth it? Family, or him? I can only pick one. There's no "both" or "in between."

"You said your family doesn't know me." Ted replies. "The truth is, they don't know you."


	39. Chapter 39

I'm different.

I'm different from every other member of my house, my blood status, and my family.  
I'm not like them.

I've always known it.  
But I was always ashamed to admit it.

Now I realize, I'm proud. I'm proud that I've climbed out of the whole that is evil. I'm proud of who I've become.  
But how good am I really?  
Why does my family make everything so hard?

But him.  
He's like me.  
I've never met anyone like me.  
We care about the same things. We work _together_ for a common goal! For a greater good.

I love how we make no noise when we're under the cloak, because we walk in sync. So in sync, that we don't make a sound.

It's like we share cores, or something. We always know what the other is thinking. We finish each others sentences. How many times have we said the same thing at the same time? It used to scare me; now, it gives me hope.

* * *

"I can't stand fighting with you." Ted looks awful.  
"Well, deal with it! We need to figure this out!" I say. Tough luck, boy. We have to figure out wheat we're going to do; and soon.

We're fighting, again. Ted hates any sort of behavior that isn't peaceful or constructive. He always runs away from people fighting. Not literally, but you get my point.

"I have to go." He says, as though on cue.  
"What? You can't! We need to figure shit out!"  
"Well this isn't the way to do it. I'll see you tomorrow."  
"Ted you can't go!" I shout after him. But he does.

The one who would never leave, has left.

He finally proved he wasn't perfect.

But did he have to do it _now?_

* * *

My fight with Ted is really bothering me. I can't be bothered to put up with my obnoxious house-mates right now. Instead, I take a walk. I should feel nervous without our cloak, but my mind is occupied with him._  
_

Nobody's perfect.

Without realizing how I got there, I find myself in the old empty classroom I used to attempt Transfiguration in. Before Ted.

"I was wondering when you'd come back." A voice says.

I whirl around to see a flash of light explode in my face.  
I lay there, on the floor of the classroom. Immobilized by the spell.

"Missed me?" The voice says again.

Then, the smug mace of Thorfinn Rowle comes into view.

"You use to hole up in this room every night. Everyone wondered where you went. I thought I knew. But you haven't been in here in months. Where've you been, Andromeda? Our entire house is dying to know. They're just to afraid to ask. Me? I know how to get what I want."

He bends down, as close to my face as he can get without touching it. Suddenly, he's gone.  
Thorfinn goes rocketing through the air and lands a few feet away, stunned. We both look around wildly. There's no one else here!  
Suddenly, I feel something grab me from under my arms and drag my immobilized form towards the door.  
There's no one holding me. I just see air. I can't see anyone else! Thorfinn looks like he's going to wet himself.  
Then, whatever was dragging me stops. I feel my arms being released.  
What was that sound?  
A sickening crack, like a breaking nose. Thorfinn's nose starts bleeding, like he's been punched in the face.  
Then, I feel my something take hold of under my arms again, and I'm carefully dragged from the room. The door closes and locks, all by itself. I feel Thorfinn's hex lifted from me. Then, something swoops over me.

Our invisibility cloak.  
Ted.

"I told you I'd never let him hurt you again." He says.  
I throw my arms around his neck and kiss him.

* * *

"How did you know?" As soon as we're back at our place in the middle of the deserted quidditch pitch, I ask Ted my most burning question.  
"Severus. He was running down the corridor like a madman, so I pulled a prefect and stopped him. He started rambling about someone getting raped tonight and how he couldn't do anything about it. Then he realized who he was talking to and ran off. But I knew. I knew and came running, under our cloak. _I should've been there."_ Ted explains, hanging his head.  
"You came. That's all that matters. Thank you." And he holds me close.

Then, my memory catches up with me.

"Ted! Ted, we can't be here! It's not safe!" I exclaim.  
"What? What do you mean?" He replies urgently.  
"When we were avoiding each other, I would come sit out here by myself. But I felt someone watching me every night. I thought I was being paranoid, but Thorfinn said he was looking for me. Someone's been watching me!"  
"Dromeda, stop. It's okay. You're safe. It was me." He says calmly.  
"What was?"  
"The person watching you. That was me. I had to make sure you were safe."

* * *

No one's ever done something like that for me.  
No one's ever protected me. It was always expected of me to take care of myself. Bella, Cissy and I defend each other, but in the end you have to fend for yourself.

But him.  
He never left.

Ted and I can't be wrong.

How do I know?

Because not a single thing in my life has ever felt so right.

Sitting in my special chair in the Slytherin common room;  
Laughing with my sisters until the wee hours of the morning;  
Running around Hogwarts that day with Rabastan;  
Casting the perfect Bat-Bogey hex;

_Nothing_ compares to him.

Nothing's ever felt as right as him.  
And that's how I know.  
My entire life I was living a lie, looking for something without even knowing it.  
I thought I had everything.  
My mind didn't know that something was missing.  
But my heart knew.  
Him.

So we're going to do it. We're going to risk everything. Because this is meant to be. We're not perfect, but we're perfect for each other. I love him.

"I love you, too." Ted says back.  
Was I talking out loud?


	40. Chapter 40

A few weeks later, our NEWTs are over, school is out. We've made it. The end of Hogwarts.  
I might cry a little.  
But that's okay now.

We're free.

And today, everything changes.

* * *

The most amusing thing is watching your housemates wonder where you are when really, you;re standing right beside them. You're just invisible.  
This cloak is great.  
Once we're gathered in front of the train, I turn to Ted and kiss him. As we kiss, I feel Ted pulling our cloak off of us, just as we planned.  
The entire Slytherin and Hufflepuff houses let out a collective gasp and drop their jaws in unison. I can't help smiling.

"YOU!"

An angry yell interrupts our grand unveiling. Uh oh.  
Thorfinn has his wand out.

"HE'S THE ONE THAT HEXED ME! YOU BROKE MY NOSE, MUDBLOOD!" Thorfinn bellows. I'm about to draw my wand. Too late. Thorfinn fires a hex that neither Ted nor I have time to block.  
Someone else, however, blocks it for us. A giant shield from a very powerful protego has appeared between us and the Slytherins. I look to my right.  
Narcissa.  
She notices my eye, and stows her wand quickly, so no one else will notice.  
Ted pulls we towards the train by the hand, leaving my former friends to fight through the shield that my baby sister conjured for us.  
We find a compartment at random, try the few protective enchantments we know, and sit together under the cloak. We knew this plan would go over horribly, but it's still frightening.

* * *

"_Homenum Revelio!_"  
I feel something swoop low over me.  
Shit.  
The Slytherins have searched the entire train. Now, they've found us. I can hear blasts from numerous spells outside the door.  
"They've got some funky spell on it!" Antonin Dolohov shouts. Idiot.  
"Move over, idiot!" Lara yells."_Bombarda_!"  
Then, the door explodes to bits.  
Debris rains down on us. It tears our cloak, cuts our robes, gashes our faces. Ted and I are exposed. We draw our wands, ready for the fight we knew was coming. But it never happens.  
"_Immobulus_!" Several young voices shout in unison.  
The Slytherins are all frozen in the doorway, unable to move. Ted and I get up and look outside the door.  
There, grinning from ear to ear, stand four first year Gryffindors. James Potter, Remus Lupin, the fat one who's name I still don't know, and Sirius. Dear Sirius. What would I do without my favorite cousin?  
"Be impressed, Andromeda. That was a second year spell. Hi Ted!" Sirius says gleefully. I give him a great big hug.  
"This is the part where you lecture me for kissing a muggleborn in front of the entire school." I say to my cousin.  
"Are you kidding? That was _awesome_! That was beyond any prank we've pulled all year! Their faces were priceless!" He says back.  
I turn to look at the identity of our attackers, still frozen in the doorway.

Thorfinn Rowle  
Antonin Dolohov  
Demetrius Nott  
Lara Selwyn  
Lucius Malfoy  
Miranda Gies  
And Timur Yaxley.

I notice Evan missing. Along with Crabbe and Goyle.  
I only care about one person though.  
Cissy.

* * *

After refreezing my former housemates/friends, we take their wands and place them in a neat pile outside the doorway. The train has come to a stop.  
"I found Narcissa! She's already off the train! Get going before someone finds your parents!" Sirius says hurriedly. I give Ted a fast kiss before sprinting off the Hogwarts express for the last time.

* * *

"Andromeda Black! There you are!" Mother barks when I reach them and Cissy. "It's about time! We don't like to be kept waiting! And running is not ladylike!"  
"Narcissa has warned us that a Muggleborn-rights activist from the Ministry is looking for us. We will _not_ be seen conversing with such scum, we're leaving now. No time for goodbyes." Father says sharply. I mouth a silent "thank you" to Cissy, who looks down at her feet. With that, my family hurries through the barrier and apparates home.

* * *

Welcome home, Andromeda.

My house's location is a closely guarded secret; a rule fueled by my parent's paranoia and hatred of nearly everyone. It's under a fidelius charm. Father is the secret keeper. He doesn't trust any one else with it, not even Mother. Definitely not his daughters. The charm is lifted only on the day of our annual Christmas Ball, and on Bellatrix's wedding. Other than that, no one has ever seen my house.

The house itself is large and dark. Made of brick, the house is three stories tall. There's the main house itself, and two huge wings added on either side. There are large chimney's scattered throughout the roof. The garden around it is overgrown, since a gardener could never find the house.

I always hated the fidelius charm on our house. But now, it's going to keep my parents safe from the truth of today's events. For now.

* * *

**For a picture of Andromeda's house, visit my profile for the link**

* * *

Ripley, our ancient house elf, holds the door for us and takes our coats.  
"Bella will be visiting later. She and the Lestranges will be staying for supper." Father says, lighting his pipe. He then disappears into his study.  
Bella's coming! Yes! Oh, how I've missed my sister! I turn to Narcissa, but she's already ascending the stairs to her room. I'm about to go after her, when Ripley addresses me:  
"Miss Black, you have a guest waiting in the courtyard." He says before bowing and exiting. I'm Miss Black now. I forgot about that.

Bellatrix, being the oldest, was always Miss Black. Cissy and I, being the younger two, were addressed as Miss Narcissa and Miss Andromeda, respectively. Now that Bella is Mrs. Lestrange, I guess that I'm Miss Black now. I should be happy. I've been longing to be "Miss Black" for years. But none of that matters to me anymore.

Wait. I have a guest? How the Helga can I have a guest? No one can see this place! I run out to the courtyard.

I can't believe it.

* * *

**I apologize for the crappiness and jumping-aroundness of this chapter. **  
**And, Sirius returns! Oot oot!**

**Kisses! xoxo  
**


	41. Chapter 41

"Rabastan!" I squeal, before running into his open arms. After all these months, he's really here.  
"Hey, D." My best friend says breathlessly.  
I look up, at the face I've missed so much.  
Truth is I haven't missed him as much as I thought I would. I still missed him lots.

My smile fades as fast as it appeared.  
The face before me is not the face that left Hogwarts with his parents.  
The face before me is not that of a young, dark, good-looking boy who was just becoming a man. It's not the face of the boy who grew up like a prince. Not the face of the dark haired boy who even muggleborn girls couldn't help but adore. There is no sign of his thoughtful look or malicious grin.  
The face before me is that of a young dark, man who grew up too fast. His good looks marred by the worn, tired-almost hateful-expression that now covers Rabastans seventeen-year-old face.  
And his eyes. The dark eyes that used to dance when he was proud. The eyes who's dark browns would churn in circles when he was thinking hard. The eyes that always softened, just a little, when he saw his girlfriend, or his best friend.  
Those eyes, are now dead.  
There is no life left in the eyes of my best friend. They're just never-ending pools of darkness.

"Rabastan, you look so, so.. tired." I say carefully. "Tired" is a safe word.  
"Of course I'm tired! Durmstrange makes you work! Way better than that pussy school you go to! My kids will never got to Hogwarts! What a joke! Straight to Durmstrang with them!" He shouts, almost angrily?  
"Rabastan, you're yelling." I say.  
"Yea, so? Okay, okay." He finishes.  
"Hey, check it out, D! I'm ripped now! Quidditch in Durmstrang is crazy! Look!" Rabsatan flexes his right arm and shows it to me.  
"Galloping Gargoyles! Look at you!" I exclaim. His muscles are huge! They're actually a bit bigger than Teds!

I always wondered how Ted had such muscles. He explained that muggles use their muscles for everything, so they get fairly strong.

Crap. Ted.

"Miss Black! Master Rabastan! Supper is served!" Ripley calls from the house. Rabastan offers me his arm, and I take it. I ignore my mounting panic that something terrible has overcome and changed my best friend.

* * *

Ripley sure has outdone himself. He must've had help from the Lestrange's elf. Of course no one mentions how good the food is. Elves aren't worth complimenting to them.

"Well" Father starts. "Now that we are all together, I have an announcement. Andromeda, dearest, Rabastan here has agreed to take you as his wife!" Father exclaimed. Bella lets out a giggle before clamping her hand over her mouth. She's smiling like a madman!  
Cissy, on the other hand, looks like she's going to scream, and not in happiness. She knows the entire story. Not to mention the change in Rabastan.  
Speaking of Rabastan, I turn to look at my- fiance? Despite the giant, terrible news, he shows no emotion. None. Zilch. No smile, no angry face, no sadness in his eyes, nothing! I'm suddenly aware that everyone is looking at me. Shit. Self control, Andromeda!  
"Well, er, um, I, wow." I sputter.  
"She's speechless! Isn't that lovely, Father?" Cissy says happily. Future actress, that one.  
"Right you are, Narcissa dear. Rabastan, Andromeda, why don't you two talk outside? We'll be having a late dessert." Father says. And his happiness _isn't_ fake. Rabastan and I get up and walk to the courtyard.

* * *

"Surprise." Rabastan says sarcastically.  
"_Are you crazy!_" I snap in disbelief. This is soo not happening.  
"It's not like I had a choice. I do what's asked of me."  
"So, you don't wanna marry me then?" I ask.  
"Why not? You're my best friend." He replies.  
"There's a difference between best friend and wife, Rabastan! We'd be like Rodolphus and Bellatrix!" I hiss so no one else hears.  
"Rodolphus and Bellatrix don't love each other!" He hisses back.  
"And we do?"  
"In a best friend way..."  
"Exactly! Best friend love! Not boyfriend-girlfriend love!" I say.  
"There's no such thing. Boyfriend-girlfriend love doesn't last." Rabastan mutters darkly.  
"Patricia is a bitch! Don't let her ruin your chances of happiness!" I plead.  
"I'd be happy if I had to live with you for the rest of my life, D."  
"We're only seventeen!"  
"We're mature for our age."  
"Rabastan!" I beg.  
"Look, we don't have a choice. My parents have been dead-set on this since they met you on my last day of Hogwarts. There's no way out of it."  
Those weird looks they were giving me- this is why! They were scoping out a (near)future bride for their son!  
"But, we're already related! Is that even legal?" I ask.  
"The Gaunts used to marry their own cousins before they died out. No one ever complained about it." Rabastan replies.  
"I'm sorry, D. There's no way out."

* * *

The next day, I'm awake bright and early. I grab our family owl before anyone else notices, and hide the reply that follows. Since it's noon by the time I receive a reply, everyone is awake. I find Mother.  
"I'm going out, Mother. I need to tell Lara the-er, news." I say.  
"Very well. Be home for supper." Mother says, without looking up from her book. She wouldn't have noticed if I'd left, anyway.  
I step out of the house, turn on the spot, and apparate to my rendez-vous. And it's not Lara who I'm meeting.

* * *

As I turn on the spot, I picture one thing:  
Him.  
And sure enough, when the spinning stops, I'm face to face with him.  
Ted.  
I collapse into his arms and cry.  
I swore I'd stop doing that.  
"Dromeda, what happened?" He asks soothingly, while stroking my hair.  
"I-I'm getting married!" I blurt out.  
Ted's whole body goes rigid.  
"What do you mean?" He breaths.  
"They're making me marry Rabastan!" I cry.  
Ted was holding me, but his hands drop. He's totally white. He sways a little where he's standing.  
"Ted!"  
I sit down and put his head in my lap. He closes his eyes and takes deep breathes until his breathing is almost normal again. A bit of his color comes back.  
"I can't marry him. I _won't_ marry him! I'd be just like Bella! Ted, we have to do something!"  
"W-What do you want to do Andromeda?" He asks.  
"It's not what I _want_ to do, it's what I _have_ to do. I have to run away."


	42. Chapter 42

That night, I'm home for our silent supper. It's still weird being in this giant house without Bella bouncing off the walls. I miss her.  
But I know, Bella isn't really Bella anymore.

I found out yesterday.

* * *

"Andromeda! You're going to marry Rabastan! I'm so exited, you have no idea! We can both be Mme. Lestange! Isn't that fun!" Bella is literally jumping up and down and clapping her hands. When I don't answer, she continues.  
"So, I was told you showed your housemates the note? Good girl, I can _always_ count on you! Really, I couldn't ask for better sisters! I'm so proud of who you've become, Andromeda!" And Bella hugged me. She's not much of a hugger, Bellatrix. She doesn't feel the need to express her fondness of people. But yesterday, she hugged me. For a second, I was crazy enough to think she'd understand, that she'd be there for me. I nearly told her about Ted.  
"Bella, I-"  
"Oh! That reminds me! I promised to tell you about my new teacher! He's sooo great! He's traveled the world, learning forgotten forms of magic. Now, he's sharing it with a select few chosen pupils. And get this, I'm his most promising student! Me! In Hogwarts I was never good at anything!" She squealed. It's true. Bella passed her NEWTs, but that's about it. She's never been the best at anything.

"Er, Bella? Who is this teacher?" I ask wearily.  
"Have you ever heard of a man named Tom Riddle?" She whispers to me.  
"Voldemort!" I say, a little too loudly.  
"DON'T CALL HIM THAT!" Bella yells angrily.  
Mood swing?  
"Sorry, Andromeda. You probably didn't know better. That stupid school. I'm worried about Cissy going back for two more years. But _don't_ call him that, _ever._ It's disrespectful to a man of such talent and _prestige_!" Bella says.

So that's it then. The wonderful teacher? Lord Voldemort.  
The amazing magic he's been showing my sister? Some ancient forms of Dark Magic.

And I knew then, that Bella was gone.  
But I'll always hope, somewhere inside me, that one day she'll come back.

* * *

That was yesterday.  
Was it only yesterday?  
So much has happened in a day.  
I graduated Hogwarts,  
kissed Ted in front of the entire student body,  
lived through an attack by my former friends,  
got rescued by four eleven year-olds,  
learned that my big sister has become a Death Eater,  
was told that I have to marry my best friend,  
and realized that I can't live this life any longer.

This life as a pureblood Princess Black of the Slytherins, it's not my life. It never truly has been. It never will be. My life is with Ted. A life of light and love.

I finally found myself. I can't bear to loose me again.

I can't live my life as someone else anymore

Before I do anything rash (more rash than kissing Ted in front of the train? Yeah right!) I need to talk to Cissy. She's been cold-shouldering me, and I don't blame her. But I _must_ talk to her before I make any decisions.  
I walk up the stairs to Narcissa's room. I find the petite blonde sitting on her bed, looking out her window into the courtyard.  
"Cissy?" I slowly let myself in the door.  
My little sister says nothing and turns to the window again.  
"Cissy, I-I'm sorry. I know you think I've betrayed everyone, but I haven't." I say quietly.  
"You sound like Patricia." Narcissa snaps. This isn't the calm, serene, agreeable Narcissa I'm used too. Cissy and I have always gotten on exceptionally well.  
"Cissy! Talk to me here!"  
"_Talk to you! What is there to say? He's a mudblood Andromeda! A MUDBLOOD! Stay away from him!_"  
"I can't.  
"_Why not?_"  
"I love him."

Silence.

"How can you love THAT?"  
"He's no different from us!"  
"Yes he is!"  
"How?"  
"He's - dirty!"  
"_No he's not!_ He's good! He's _so_ good, Cissy! I've never met anyone like him!"  
"He. Is. A. MUDBLOOD! They hate us, remember! Just wait! His parents were probably murdered by You-Know-Who when he was a baby and he had to be raised by his awful relatives who hate wizards and lock him a broom cupboard!"  
"That is the most ridiculous story I've ever heard."  
"Just wait! He's out for revenge! He blames the purebloods for the entire thing! _He's using you_!"  
"How can you say that?"  
How can she say that?  
"Andromeda, you can't do this! Say he was threatening you-anything! I'll vouch for you! Just get rid of that boy! Just marry Rabastan and be safe and close by for the rest of our lives! You _know_ I can't get by without you!" Narcissa pleads.  
"You don't have to get by without me! I'm not going to _die_!"  
"Andromeda, don't you get it! You'll be disowned! I won't be allowed to see you! You'll loose your inheritance, everything! They'll kill you! Yes Andromeda, you _will_ die!"  
"Cissy I-I can't live without love anymore." I say.  
"What about us! What about Bella!"  
"Bella's gone. She's a Death Eater now.  
"What about me!"  
"I'm not leaving you, Narcissa!"  
"_How can you choose him over us?_"  
"Because our family is WRONG! We _kill_ people, Narcissa! KILL!"  
"Just go Andromeda."  
"Cissy-"  
"I could tell on you!" She shouted  
"Narcissa!"  
"I said GO! Go and don't ever come back! Don't tell anyone you're leaving or where you're going, just go! Don't ever let them find you! Because I'd rather know that you're out there somewhere, but I'll never see you again over you being dead and no one show up for he funeral! Not even me, because they'd keep me away! Just go!"

Slytherins often loose their sense of feeling. Rabastan has, Bella has.  
I was loosing mine, until I met him. He's the only one who can make me feel so strongly, feel so alive. I can't loose that.

I reach over and hug her. She struggles at first, but I couldn't care less. Because this is the last time I will ever hug my baby sister. Because I'm leaving. I know now, for sure. Because I've just lost Narcissa, and she was the on thing still keeping me here. Bellatrix and Rabastan are gone. My parents were never here. And now, Cissy has left me as well.  
Or maybe, I've left them.

* * *

**My beloved readers, tomorrow I will post the final chapter of his story. It seems like it's over too soon.**


	43. Chapter 43

There's one more person I need to talk to before I leave.

Rabastan.

My best friend.  
Despite his flaws, I can't leave without talking to him. I owe him this much.

We're sitting in the courtyard. I finally muster up the courage to do what I know will be the end. It's only a matter of time before someone tells the Lestranges about the train ride home. I need to tell Rabastan first.

"Rabastan?" I ask.  
"Yea D?" He replies.  
"I'm not going to marry you. You're free to find someone who'll bring you true happiness."  
"D, we've been over this! Why are you making such a big deal out of this?"  
Oh, I don't know,_ because us forced into getting married is a big deal, Rabastan!_

"I-I'm in love with Ted Tonks." I blurt out.  
He was silent then. Too silent. He stood there and looked at me, just, looked at me. He's way to calm… maybe he's okay with it! Oh, I secretly hoped that he'd accept it! At last, my best friend speaks, at first very calmly:  
"I'm going to marry you as soon as I can. I'm going to buy you the grandest house in the entire world and fill it with anything you could ever possibly want. Then I'll lock you in it. I'll lock you in our beautiful house for as long as it takes. I'll keep you in our house until you forget him. And while you're safe at home, I'll kill him. I'll kill the scum who's done this to you. I'LL KILL HIM!" Rabastan shouts, now standing.  
Rabastan's going crazy.  
I run.  
"Get back here, Andromeda!" He yells after me. I don't stop. I don't look back. Rabastan is strong. I can't let him catch me.  
"What's going on here! What's all the racket!" Father has emerged from his study.  
"Andromeda! This isn't ladylike!" Mother too, has joined us from the kitchen. Narcissa runs down the stairs with Bella, who just flooed in from the Lestranges for a visit.  
"She thinks she loves a mudblood!" Rabastan shouts furiously.  
Dead silence.  
"B-but, SHE CAN'T! WHY ARE YOU LYING TO US, RABASTAN!" Bella shrieks, drawing her wand.  
"Bella, no! It's true!" I shout. I can't let her hurt him. I still love my best friend. I still love them all.  
All eyes turn towards me.  
"WHAT!" Father bellows.  
"It's true! I'm in love with Ted Tonks! I'm going to marry him!" I shout. Years of contempt at my parents has finally exploded. They never loved me. Now they're trying to keep me from the one person who always will.  
"Why you little-" Mother pulls out her wand.  
"No!" Narcissa shouts.  
"_Protego Totalum!_" I shout before taking off running.  
Despite my spell, I see a cruciatus curse zoom past me. Protego Totalum doesn't stop the unforgivable.  
"_Protego Horribilis_! That should do it. I then turn on the spot, the last thing I see is the heartbroken face of Narcissa and the enraged faces of Rabastan and Bellatrix, before I disappear.

* * *

I open my eyes, and I'm home.  
Not the Black Mansion I grew up in.  
That's not home.  
Ted.  
That's home.

I sway on the spot, weary from shock at what's just happened to me. He rushes froward and catches me. Then, Ted carries me into a house. His house, I suppose. Is that where we are? Ted sets me on a sofa and sits down beside me. I can't be bothered to study the room. My mind is elsewhere.

I'm never going back.

I'll never see Bella and Rabastan again.  
I'll never see Cissy again.

And those two thoughts make me totally fall apart.

* * *

"Ted?" I sniffle after a good pathetic long cry.  
"Yeah?"  
"Why are _you_ crying?" I've just lost my family. What's _he_ blubbering about?  
"Because you're crying." He says, as though it was obvious.  
"You're crying because _I'm_ crying?"  
"Yea? I can't stand seeing you so upset. You've just lost so much. It breaks my heart." He says softly.  
"Breaks _your_ heart?" What about mine!"  
"Look! I'm not saying I know what it's like! I just can't stand seeing you in pain! Why is that so crazy to you?"  
"I've just never met anyone like you, Ted. But I think I might like you." I tease.  
"Oh really. You think?" He replies sarcastically.  
"Maybe. I'm still debating it." I say, and smile sweetly when he scowls. I like his smile better. So I kiss him. Sure enough, his smile returns.  
"Where are your parents?" I wonder out loud, ruining the mood. Oh well.  
"My widowed uncle is ill. They're staying with him for awhile. You can stay here, if you want." Ted offers.  
"Even if I did have an alternative, I'd still say yes." I smile. Then I kiss him again before falling asleep, my head still pounding from crying and stress.

* * *

I'm in love with Ted.

I love how he writes with his left hand but does everything else with his right.  
I love how he carries a sickle which he's always rolling over his knuckles.  
I love how he whistles muggle songs to himself whenever he walks and doesn't care if no one's ever heard them.  
I love how he dots his i's with a smiley face.  
I love how he hasn't worn a matching pair of socks since fourth year.  
I love how good he is at FINDing things.  
I love how the room brightens when he enters it.  
I love how good he is.  
I love how he loves me.

* * *

**Track: Dark Side - Kelly Carkson **_(Ted and Andromeda's song)_

I've been living with Ted for three days. Never in my life have I felt so, safe. Life seems so much simpler with him. Paradise.

The post arrives at its usual time. But something's off.  
There are two handsome tawnie owls accompanying the owl from the Daily Prophet, each carrying a large square envelope.  
"Could it be? Already?" Ted mused aloud. NEWTs, this early? I guess that's why the OWL results took so long to arrive, the delivery owls are busy with NEWTs.

The first owl lands in front of me, the second in front of Ted. They both lift their right leg.  
Ted and I untie our letters and begin to read.  
"Look!" Ted exclaims, reading over my shoulder. "You passed Transfiguration!"

* * *

"Ted, where's the paper?" I ask Ted that afternoon.  
"What? Oh, um, dunno." He says quickly before turning away.  
"Weren't you reading it before I took a shower?"  
"That um, that was yesterday's paper!"  
"You 'recycled' yesterdays paper. Yesterday." Ted told me all about muggle's recycling stuff yesterday. Inventive, these muggles are.  
"I can't lie to you, 'Dromeda." He sighs. Ted hands me a newspaper from under the couch cushion.  
"I didn't want you to see this, you're in such a good mood. But i guess you have to." He says.  
I drop the paper on the floor.

Front page, in bold, black letters, reads the headline:

**Black Betrayal**  
**Andromeda Black Disowned**

_Yesterday, sources confirmed that Druella and Cygnus Black III have disowned their second daughter, thus removing her inheritance, yesterday at the Ministry of Magic._  
_The reason? Countless eyewitnesses from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry have confirmed sighting the former Black heiress publicly engaged in romantic activities the the muggle-born wizard, Teddy "Ted" Tonks._

"Your name is _Teddy_?" I exclaim, forgetting the article for a moment. I can't be real, anyway.  
"Yes! Now can we focus!" Ted replies sharply. I turn back to the Daily Prophet:

_When asked for comment on their daughters relationship, Druella and Cygnus Black III said: "We don't have a daughter named Andromeda! Blacks don't give birth to filthy blood traitors!"  
Narcissa Black denied comment.  
When asked for comment about the recent actions of her sister, Andromeda, the newlywed Bellatrix Lestrange replied: "MY SISTER'S NAME IS NARCISSA! WE DON'T HAVE A SISTER NAMED ANDROMEDA!" She then proceeded to hex the reporter who is now recovering in St. Mungo's._

So that's it then. It _is_ real. What they think of me; in broad daylight for everyone to read. It only took my parents two days to disown me. The small glimmer of hope I had that maybe they'd forgive me has been extinguished. All I have is Ted.

In the end, all I need is Ted.

"They're looking for you." Ted says, reading the rest of the article. For both of us. Rabastan has a 'message' for me."  
"If they find us here, your parents will be in danger. And trust me, they _will_ look here." I say.  
"Fancy a vacation?" Ted asks, grinning.  
"A honeymoon?"  
"Whatever you want, love."

* * *

Ted leaves his note to his parents on the kitchen table, under the newspaper.

_Dear Mum and Dad,_

_I'm going away for awhile. But I'll be back._  
_P.S. I'm in love._

_Your son,_

_Ted._

* * *

I was never Andromeda Black.  
Not really.  
I never truly belonged there, in that house.  
All my life, I've belonged right here, on a broom beside the love of my life, the man who never gave up on me. About to fly away into the setting sun, to our freedom.  
And that's the truth.  
It's a funny thing, the truth.  
It's set me free.

End.

* * *

**Wow. I'm done. The story ends here. I don't know what to say. I never thought this story would make it so far. I'm so proud of what we've accomplished!**  
**Thank you to everyone who reviewed! You guys inspired me to put forth only my best work. You are the reason I kept going!**

**A special thanks to Jannice Sace and Chibi-Lil. You guys were inspirational and motivating with your kind, insightful and motivating words. The quality of this story improved majorly with your support!**

**The sequel is up! "Pure" can be found on my profile!  
Say hello to Narcissaaa! "Pure" is from Narcissa's perspective, and includes all of our favorite characters, plus a few more! (Hello, Regulus!)**

**Thank you for all your support.**  
**Kisses!**

**-IWishIWasAWeasley**


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